
Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/862737.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      One_Direction_(Band)
  Relationship:
      Harry_Styles/Louis_Tomlinson, Harry_Styles/Original_Female_Character,
      Harry_Styles/Original_Male_Character
  Character:
      Harry_Styles, Louis_Tomlinson, Zayn_Malik, Niall_Horan, Liam_Payne
  Additional Tags:
      One_Direction_are_kids, Drug_Use, Non-Graphic_Violence, Underage_-
      Freeform, Orphans, Foster_Care, Alternate_Universe
  Series:
      Part 2 of All_Together
  Stats:
      Published: 2013-06-29 Completed: 2013-07-13 Chapters: 8/8 Words: 42496
****** All Together 2 ******
by Geoffreyofmonmouth
Summary
     Sequel to "All Together". One Direction are kids in a foster home. If
     you haven't read "All Together", some plot points might seem obscure.
     This contains underage. Not just a little underage, but a lot
     underage. Don't complain, because I've warned you.
Notes
     Please note it's Alternate Universe. I don't mean to imply anything
     about the boys' real life parents here. I know in real life, the boys
     are loved very much by their parental figures.
     I last skateboarded in the 1990's and I was never a skatehead. Please
     forgive any awkwardness on the subject.
See the end of the work for more notes
***** No title *****
For two years the five of them had been living under Ms Curtis' roof. Harry was
now twelve, in Year Seven, and Louis fourteen, in Year Nine, with the other
boys in Year Eight, sandwiched between the two.
Harry was pleased to be going to high school at last. He got to hang out with
Niall, Zayn and Liam again. Tom, Callum and Melody also went to the same high
school, so he had plenty of friends from which to choose.
Best of all, Ms Curtis let him skateboard to school, as long as he promised to
stay on the pavement. He and Louis would set off early each morning, and meet
up with a group of other skateheads in one of the carparks at the shopping
centre. The meeting spot had a roadway sloping upwards, a pedestrian ramp and
some steps--plenty of props for them. All the other skateboarders were in Year
Nine and Harry felt thrilled to hang around with the older boys.
Louis was more accomplished than ever. He could get airborne--ollieing, it was
called--and grind his way down the hand-railing of the steps. It looked so
cool. Harry had learned to grind, but only on kerbs and low surfaces like that.
He wasn't a natural like Louis, but he tried hard.
The skateboarders spent their time on their boards or doing tricks, but then
they'd break off, sit around in a loose group on top of their boards, and chat.
Girls was a popular subject.
"Lou, I know someone who likes you," said Darren, a boy with a backwards
baseball cap and who wore shorts and ankle socks even though it was starting to
be chilly. Blue shorts; because the school uniform was blue trousers, white
shirt (a t-shirt was okay) and blue jacket or jumper. The school had official
blazers but mostly the Sixth Formers wore them. Harry aspired to a blazer. He
thought the Sixth Formers looked classy, all grown up, in them.
"What do you mean, someone who likes me?" said Louis, his legs stuck out from
his skateboard, next to Harry's feet.
"I mean, a girl, stupid."
"Yeah, she isn't half obvious," said another boy, Leo, who had spiky hair
somewhat imitating Louis' style.
"Who?" asked Louis, but sounding as if he really didn't want to know.
"Emily, am I right, bro?" Leo said to Darren.
"Spot on," said Darren.
"Emily?" repeated Louis.
"Haven't you noticed? She can't get a sentence out around you. Too busy
giggling."
"All girls giggle."
"She's got it bad for you. You should ask her out. She's shy, she's not going
to ask you."
"Remember," said Cameron, "you have to share with the brotherhood all of the
details."
"I don't want to go out with anyone," said Louis.
Harry examined him. It was two years since Coach Morrison molested him; two
years since he'd had a girlfriend. His confidence and cheek was back to the
Louis of old, but Harry knew why he didn't want a girlfriend; Louis still
thought of himself as damaged goods. Harry had never been able to soothe that
out of him. Right now, Louis looked shuttered.
"I'm telling you man," said Darren. "You're in. Just ask her out."
"I will, if you ask one of her friends out," said Louis.
"Done. I don't back away from a challenge."
Louis had obviously been hoping he would. He closed his eyes for a long moment.
"Come back to me with proof," he said, opening his eyes, "and I'll ask Emily
out."
"You're on, mate. But it counts, even if I get turned down."
"All right."
"Yeah." Darren high-fived Louis.
Cameron stood up. "We'd better get going."
All of the four boys, plus Harry, stood up, and skateboarded out of the carpark
onto the main route to high school. which was just down the road. Harry went in
front of Louis, as usual. Louis liked to keep an eye on Harry, even though
Harry could skateboard without falling off, now. Sometimes he wished Louis
trusted him, but on the other hand he knew it wasn't about trust; it was Louis
looking out for him, as an older brother.
They arrived at school just as the first bell went. Harry separated from Louis
and the boys with a "see you later" before heading to the Year Seven locker
area. Fortunately they had big lockers, and he was able to fit his skateboard
inside. He didn't want to leave it out with his bag; it was too precious. He
shoved his helmet in his bag, however. He knew no one would want to steal his
helmet.
He met Melody in science lab. They'd split up for a time in Year Six, but were
now back together. She was developing breasts and Harry was worried that he
wasn't as fascinated by this as his other friends were. He was high in the
pecking order amongst the boys at school because he'd touched a girl's breast
several years ago. He'd never touched Melody's. So he looked at her in science
class, looked at her breasts, and wondered what it would be like to touch one.
She wore a bra now, he knew; she'd told him with pride.
Harry was popular in high school, too, and nobody teased him that his science
partner was a girl. Today they were doing an experiment; a simple experiment,
but they had to use bunsen burners for the first time.
"Everyone," said the teacher, "collect a mat to put under the bunsen burner,
and a stand to put over it. It's very important that you have both. Then you
can collect your chemicals."
Harry was in charge of the chemicals. Melody got the stuff for the bunsen
burner.
"The liquid will turn into solid white particles," said the teacher. "What
happens is a new compound is formed, and a gas is released. That's a chemical
reaction. I'll write the equation on the board. Write down your hypothesis."
The liquids were clear. At the teacher's instruction, Harry added one liquid to
another and propped the container on the bunsen burner. Melody turned the
burner on. They watched in fascination as, with the application of heat, the
mixture began to turn a cloudy white. The teacher warned them to keep back from
the bunsen burner. Harry wondered what would happen if they were near it. Could
it explode? He watched the white liquid with excitement, but it didn't explode.
It merely bubbled. As liquid burnt off, a white substance began to form. The
teacher warned them to turn off their bunsen burners when this happened. Harry
and Melody waited until they had enough solid before turning off the bunsen
burner. They wrote down their results, and the equation from the board. Harry
liked using the bunsen burner. The orange-to-blue flame was great. He hoped
they got to use it a lot more in high school science.
At break time he went to hang out with Liam and Zayn and Niall. Zayn was
starting to get hormones. He had his eye on a girl called Lucy in his year.
Instead of paying attention to the conversation between the boys, he kept his
eye on Lucy and her friends, of whom Melody was one. Melody hung out with the
older girls because she was more mature than girls her age.
"Ask her out," said Harry.
"Who?" said Zayn, pretending like he hadn't been staring across the courtyard
all break.
"Lucy. I know you like her."
"Lucy?"
"Just ask her out. We could go on a double date to the icecream shop."
"Yeah. Well. It's not that simple," said Zayn.
"Yes it is. You just go up to her and say, 'will you be my girlfriend?' She'll
say yes. Melody says she likes you."
"Come on, Zayn, do it," said Niall.
"Only if you do it," said Zayn.
"But who would I date?"
"Candy, Jessica, Lauren... you've got lots of choices."
"But girls think I'm immature," said Niall.
"At least try," said Zayn.
It ended up all four of them going over to Melody's group. Liam was going to
ask a girl out, too.
Three boys, wanting to talk to a girl in private. That was the ultimate excuse
for giggles amongst the girls. Harry and Melody looked on fondly as their
friends separated into pairs.
"Do you think they'll say yes?" Harry said to her.
"I don't know. They might. They want boyfriends. Your brothers are pretty
cute."
It turned out Lucy said yes to Zayn, Candy to Niall, and Jessica to Liam. Liam
looked panicked at Harry and whispered, "Now what do we do?"
"We all hang out together," said Harry.
And they did, all sitting down, each pair together, on the courtyard. Harry
looked around at his brothers and felt happy. At last they could join in
something he was doing. At last he didn't have to be the only one who had a
girlfriend.
He wondered how Louis was getting on with Emily.
***
It was night. Harry, despite being twelve now, was still afraid at night. Louis
still checked the house for intruders for him, sometimes with Harry in tow.
Tonight, Harry was with Louis. Louis shone the torch, checked behind furniture
and curtains, did all of the things Harry needed to make him feel better.
"Okay?" whispered Louis, when they'd checked Ms Curtis' room.
"Yes."
"Back to bed, then."
Louis had tried to wean Harry from needing to be in bed with him over the past
couple of years, but Harry had nightmares each time he was alone, and Louis
quickly gave in. Harry never had nightmares while sleeping with Louis, and
Louis knew it. Louis was currently going through a phase where he had a hard-on
nearly every morning. Crammed up in a single bed together, it was impossible
for Harry not to notice, since he liked to sleep wrapped around Louis. Harry's
dick got hard sometimes too. Sometimes it didn't even need to be morning; he
could get hard just as easily when they first got in bed together. All he
needed to do was hug Louis, and all of his feelings seemed to spill over.
So tonight, when they went to bed together, he was hugging Louis, chest to
chest, and he felt himself harden up again. He tried to avoid pressing into
Louis' thigh. It was difficult, though. He wanted to hug Louis so tightly.
"Niall and Zayn and Liam have all got girlfriends now," he told Louis, leaving
off the squeezing for the moment, and relaxing back.
"You're kidding. How did that happen?"
"Zayn wanted to ask Lucy out, but he wouldn't do it until Niall and Liam asked
some other girls out."
"Horndogs," said Louis.
"Not me," said Harry. "Kissing is nice, but anything else... I'm not ready
for."
"You don't even want to touch Melody's breasts?"
"No. I don't know what to feel about her breasts. I think I liked her better
without them."
Louis chuckled. "Mate, breasts are what makes a girl a girl. So when you hug
her, you know the difference. Like compared to when you hug me. There's a
difference."
"Yeah, but... I like hugging you better," admitted Harry.
"You'll grow out of it. You're still so young."
"Don't you like hugging me best? You said so."
"I love hugging you, Haz. You're the sweetest little brother anyone could ask
for. But... I'm dating Emily now."
"Oh. So Darren asked a girl out?"
"Yeah. And she turned him down. But I've got Emily."
"That's good," said Harry, trying to ignore the drop in his stomach. "You like
having a girlfriend."
"Yeah."
"You haven't had a girlfriend since Marissa. Even though you hang out with
Marissa like you're still dating her."
"I'm not still dating her. I've got Emily, now."
"Is it okay?" asked Harry. "You're not still worried about... Coach Morrison?"
Louis stiffened a little. Then he relaxed quickly back, reaching out an arm to
put around Harry's shoulders. "I'm over it now," he said, but he didn't sound
so sure. "Let's not talk about it." He began to stroke Harry's back.
Harry was happy not to talk about it. He knew Louis hated the subject. As far
as Harry was aware, he'd never talked about it with anyone, not even the
psychologist that he'd seen for a long time afterwards. Maybe it was better if
he bottled it up. Everyone finding out about it had nearly killed him, after
all.
Harry still had a hard-on but he hugged Louis anyway. Louis had reassured him
enough times that it was perfectly normal. Harry had been masturbating for a
couple of years, now. He liked to imagine lying in bed with Louis when he did
so, Louis right next to him. Imagining Louis watching him was usually enough to
make him cum. He didn't know why that should be so exciting, it just was. A
couple of times he imagined Louis' hand around his dick. That was the most
exciting of all.
He didn't dare masturbate in the bed while Louis was in it, though, no matter
how hard his dick got. Louis was sensitive since his encounters with Coach
Morrison. He might think he was corrupting Harry or something.
Harry fell asleep but woke up early in the morning from a sexy dream. He dreamt
that he and Louis were in bed together and Louis had begun touching him. Now he
had a very sensitive hard-on. Automatically, he pushed up against Louis, his
dick rubbing into Louis' thigh.
"Louis," he murmured, still half-asleep. He reached his hand down into his
pyjama bottoms and wrapped it around his dick. The proximity of Louis was
heady. His smell, his warmth, his body snuggled around Harry. A few tugs and he
was cumming. He felt his pyjamas dampen, and whimpered, wriggling about. It
felt so good.
Louis came awake. "Are you okay?"
Harry whimpered again.
"What's the matter, baby?"
"I came," said Harry, his half-asleep state meaning he couldn't be anything
other than honest.
Louis stroked his back. "You did what?"
"My dick went hard and I came," said Harry, burying his face in his hands.
"You had a wet dream? Don't worry about it, it's nothing to be ashamed of.
You're going through puberty. You'll have them a lot more from now on. Here,
let me get the tissues." Louis clambered over him and fetched the tissues from
the desk. He crouched down on the floor beside Harry. "Here."
Harry grabbed a handful of tissues and attempted to clean himself up. The
dampness had seeped into his pyjamas, however, all along the front. Since the
first time he'd masturbated in bed by himself, when his orgasm was unexpected,
he'd made sure to pull his pants down and have a wad of tissues to clean up
with. But this had been so sudden.
"Enough?" asked Louis.
"Yes."
Louis put the box of tissues back, then climbed over Harry to get into the bed.
Harry tossed the tissues in the direction of the bin. If he'd missed, he'd pick
them up tomorrow. He turned around, his back to Louis, and curled in on
himself. How could he face Louis after that?
"Okay?" said Louis.
Harry made a noise.
Louis slid an arm around Harry. His hand rested comfortably on his stomach,
just above the wet patch. "Don't worry about it. Whatever you dreamed about, it
doesn't have to mean anything. You can't help it."
"I'm not bad?"
"Harry. Of course not. All sorts of strange things happen when you go through
puberty. You'll probably keep having wet dreams. It dries quickly; Ms Curtis
won't know."
"She never said anything to you?"
"No. And believe me, I've had wet dreams."
"What about?" said Harry.
Louis' hand stilled on Harry's stomach. Then he started up again. "It's often
hard to remember. I just wake up having cum."
"Do you ever dream about people you know?"
"Sometimes," whispered Louis.
"Do you ever dream about me?"
Louis jolted. "Harry, don't ask that."
"Louis, you don't need to date Emily," said Harry, moving his own hand down to
encompass Loius' stroking hand. "I can give you everything you want."
"You can't. You don't know what you're talking about."
"I can try."
"No. Harry. Stop thinking like that." Louis brought his hand up from Harry's
stomach to his hair. "Go to sleep, now."
Harry allowed the warm feeling of Louis stroking his hair to envelope him.
Louis thought about him, he knew he did. He fell asleep to the comforting
thought, and to Louis' hand on his hair.
***
Next morning, Harry skateboarded to the shopping mall with Louis, as usual.
Louis tried to teach him to ollie. He'd tried before, and gotten nowhere. This
time Harry managed to become a little bit airborne.
"You've got air!" said Louis. "Just like that, Harry!"
Harry couldn't believe he'd finally left the ground, after trying for so long.
He tried again, but it didn't work. The next time, though, he concentrated, and
managed to achieve it again.
"You can do it! At last, you're a skateboarder," said Louis. "Soon you'll be
able to do this." He performed a kickflip.
Harry aimed himself at the kerb and did an ollie to come down on the kerb,
grinding his way along it. Louis clapped, and he felt pleased. The other boys
were having a competition to see who could go down the slope the fastest. Two
raced together, and the winner raced the next boy.
Darren won. And it was time to leave for school. As usual, the group
skateboarded their way there. They were allowed to bring their skateboards onto
school property but weren't allowed to ride them, just to put them away. Louis
didn't hang out much with his skateboard friends during the breaks. He hung out
with his football friend Jason and his friends, who were a year older. Louis
had managed to divorce football from what Coach Morrison had done to him. Harry
was glad about that, because Louis loved football and was good at it. It wasn't
fair for him to suffer because of Coach Morrison's actions. Louis had rejoined
the Saturday competition after Coach Morrison was put in jail. Ms Curtis now
drove him to all his games when it was football season. Niall had joined the
level below and sometimes all the boys came along to watch the games; other
times they stayed at home. Ms Curtis considered them all old enough now that
they didn't need a babysitter, during the day, at least. On the rare occasion
she went out at night, which pretty much never happened, she got a babysitter.
They arrived home a bit before the other boys. It was a faster journey on
skateboards. Ms Curtis had sandwiches waiting for them. They scoffed the
sandwiches down at the meals table, and then Louis said he was going out to
practise football.
"Want to be my keeper?" he asked Harry.
But Harry had something important to do. "Maybe later," he said, and Louis
shrugged but went out to play football by himself. Just then Niall, Zayn and
Liam came home. Harry wanted to go into Zayn's room. That was where the
computer connected to the internet was located. He waited for Zayn to drop his
bag off, then went into Zayn's room and turned on the computer. He simply had
to look it up.
'Homosexuality', he typed into the search engine.
A whole bunch of results came up. They were either pointing out that
homosexuality was a sin, or discussing what was called the psychological
perspective. One was a Wikipedia entry, and Harry looked that one up first. It
had sections on etymology and history, as well as a section for detailing
homosexuality in many parts of the world. Of particular interest was the
section 'Coming Out of the Closet'. It described how people often 'came out'
during high school or college, at least, in the USA.
None of the results would tell him if he was homosexual or not. Harry
desperately needed answers. He loved Louis. He thought about him when he jerked
off. Did that make him a homosexual or not? Maybe it just made him a pervert,
like Coach Morrison. After all, Louis was his brother.
"What are you looking up?" Zayn had come into the room.
Harry, panicky, quickly minimised the screen. "Nothing important."
"You'd better not look up sex stuff on there. Ms Curtis can find out, you
know."
But Harry knew how to delete the browser cache. He waited until Zayn left, and
did so.
Who could he talk to? Who would be able to give him answers? He felt he could
tell Niall and the boys anything, except for this. There was the guidance
counsellor at school. They were supposed to be confidential. But Harry didn't
feel comfortable talking with the counsellor about the subject. There was a boy
at school in the Sixth Form called Keaton Black who was openly gay. Maybe he
would help Harry. It made him nevous, though, to think about approaching a
Sixth Former. He was only in Year Seven. He'd probably just be laughed at.
He decided to try talking to Keaton first, anyway. He'd be better than any
guidance counsellor, that was for sure.
The next day he left for school early, without waiting for Louis. He bypassed
the shopping mall where the skateboarders hung out and went straight to school.
After dropping off his things, he went to the Sixth Former's area. The Sixth
Formers were awfully big, and seemed to take up so much space. Harry felt like
he could be blown over at any moment. But he had to do this. He went up to a
Sixth Former at his locker and asked him, "Is Keaton Black at school yet?"
"Doubt it. He drives in. What do you want with him, small fry?"
"I need to talk to him."
"Can't help you."
But Harry now knew where to go; to the school entrance that led onto the
carpark where the Sixth Formers parked. He went there, and waited for Keaton.
He watched the cars pull up, looked at the boys and girls who spilled from
them, talking and laughing. They were all so grown up. Finally he saw a tall
pale dark-haired figure. It was Keaton. He was with a couple of friends who
he'd driven in.
Harry felt intimidated but determined. He stood up and waited until Keaton drew
level with him. "Keaton!"
Keaton turned his head to look at him. "What is it, young fella?"
"I need to talk to you. It's private."
"Oh. Okay." He told his friends he'd catch up with them, and pointed along the
lawn area which ran between the carpark and the outlying classrooms. "How about
we go along here a little bit, uh, what's your name?"
"Harry."
"Come along here, Harry. We can talk in private here." Keaton moved a little
way along the lawn and sat down with his back to a classroom. Harry sat down
beside him. "Now, what's the matter?"
"I'm scared I'm gay," blurted Harry.
"What year are you in?"
"Seven."
"You're awfully young to be worrying about things like that."
"When did you know?" asked Harry.
Keaton sighed and looked straight in front of him. "In a way, I've always
known. I was never into girls. I liked to look at boys' bums, even from an
early age." He turned back to Harry and grinned, before turning serious. "Why
do you think you're gay?"
"Promise you won't tell anyone?"
"I promise, Harry. You can talk to me. You wouldn't be the first."
"I think about another boy when I jerk off. I was in bed with him, and got off
on him being next to me."
"You were in bed with him?"
"Yeah. But I don't think he feels the same way."
"Harry, I remember being your age. Everything is so new. You're just going
through puberty. You've started, haven't you? What colour is your cum?"
"It used to be just clear, but now it's white."
"You're definitely going through puberty, then. You've got sperm. Listen, how
long have you known this boy?"
"A few years."
"Have you always felt this way about him?"
"I think so, yeah. In a childish way, I did. I got jealous when he got a
girlfriend three years ago."
"What's his bum like?" winked Keaton.
Harry thought of Louis' bum. He'd seen it naked. It was beautiful. "Really
round and... pert."
"Pert, huh? I wish I could find a guy with a pert arse. Too many guys are as
flat as pancakes. But seriously. I'm not saying you're gay, but it's nothing to
be ashamed of if you are."
"Can't you tell me for sure?" said Harry. "I mean, I've got a girlfriend, but I
don't like her anywhere near as much as I like Louis."
"Why worry about labelling yourself? You're only in Year Seven. Don't get hung
up on this. If you like a guy, you like a guy. Just go for it."
"How?"
"See if he'll do a circle jerk with you," said Keaton.
"What's that?" asked Harry.
"Pull your underwear down together and have a competition to see who can cum
the fastest."
"He won't do it," said Harry. "He's funny about things like that. I've asked to
see his dick before, and he wouldn't let me, even when I told him it was
educational."
"Now that's a pick-up line," said Keaton. "Wait, how old is this Louis?"
"He's two years older than me."
"An older boy? You ever think he might be feeling just as guilty as you?
Because you sound as if you feel guilty, to me."
"It's complicated," said Harry.
"It's always complicated."
"He's my foster brother."
"Now, that's complicated," agreed Keaton. "How long's he been your brother
for?"
"A few years."
"Did you know him before he was your foster brother?"
"No."
"So you've only known him as a foster brother. Still, you're not blood
relatives, are you?"
"No," confirmed Harry. "We've been pushed together by fate."
"You said you slept with him. Surely that's a good sign?"
"I sleep with him all the time. I get nightmares, otherwise. He protects me."
"Does he ever get a hard-on when you sleep together?"
"Yes, but he says it's just hormones. And I know what he means, because my
hormones have been giving me hard-ons when I don't want them lately. Like just
in English class, for no reason. When we were reading 'Lord of the Flies'."
"I remember that age. Yeah, it's tough, but no one ever knows. They're too busy
worrying about themselves, trust me. But your boy. Don't be so hung up on him,
yeah? You're only young. Do some exploring. Experiment. See what you really
like. It doesn't have to be that you're either hetrosexual, or gay. You could
be bi. There's nothing wrong with you, either way." Keaton patted Harry on the
head. "You'll sort this out in your own time. It's five minutes to the bell.
We've got to go get ready for school now." He stood up. "Your secrets are safe
with me. I'm glad you felt you could come and talk with me."
"It was either talk to you, or the guidance counsellor," said Harry.
"I tried the guidance counsellor a few years ago. It seemed like he was pushing
heterosexuality. He's religous, and his bible tells him we're sinners. Don't
believe it. We're no more sinners in God's eye than anyone. 'Let he who is
without sin cast the first stone'. If they're honest, they can never cast the
first stone. We were all put on this earth as sinners. God loves you, he made
you what you are, remember that."
Harry stood up along with Keaton, feeling bouyed. Maybe being gay wasn't so
bad. If God still loved him, it had to be okay, didn't it? Harry fingered the
cross around his neck that his mother had given to him, a couple of years
before she died in the car crash. He believed in God, even though when he was
in his last foster home it was hard. He had just kept thinking of the story of
Job. God was testing him, and he'd been moved on to a much nicer foster home,
with a lady who he'd almost call mum, if it wasn't for Louis and his
reluctance.
"Talk to me again if you need it," said Keaton, ruffling his hair, then he was
gone, into the entrance of the school. Harry followed a minute or so after.
Keaton was right, he shouldn't be so worried. So what if he was gay? Keaton had
handled it all right, and he wasn't a loser by any means. Sure, some of the
boys in Harry's year talked about 'the fag in Sixth Form' as if it was a bad
thing, but Keaton's peers seemed to accept him.
Harry made his way back down to his locker area. He met Niall, who was clearing
out his locker. "How's it going with Candy?' he asked of Niall's girl.
"Great. We snogged. It was awesome. We're going down to the icecream parlour
after school. Want to come with Melody?"
"Yeah, okay," said Harry.
After school it turned out that all of them, except for Louis and Emily, went
down to the icecream parlour. There was Liam and Jessica, Zayn and Lucy, and
Niall and Candy. Harry walked in with Melody and sat at the booth Niall was
sitting in. The other boys were in the booth behind them. A waitress came up
and took their orders, and soon enough they were all scarfing down icecream.
Harry had ordered toffee icecream. Melody had ordered strawberry. They
exchanged licks of each other's cones. The strawberry was nice, but Harry
preferred his toffee icecream.
"Do you want to come back to my place?" asked Melody, when they'd finished.
Harry didn't have to ask Ms Curtis for permission anymore. He was allowed to
stay out until dinner-time at 6:00pm. "Okay," he said.
"My mum's not home," she told him.
"What about your dad?"
"He doesn't get home until just before six. We'll be all alone. Come on."
Having finished her icecream, she stood up.
"Where are you off to, Harry?" asked Niall as Harry shoved the last of his cone
down his mouth and stood up.
"Going to Melody's." he said.
Niall told him to have fun, and Harry and Melody left, Harry carrying his
skateboard. Melody's house wasn't far from the icecream parlour. They went up
the front steps and Melody pulled out a key from around her neck. Harry had his
own key to Ms Curtis' house which he kept around his neck, along with his
cross.
"Here we go," she said, letting him in. "Let's get snacks. Then we can do
whatever we want."
They went into the kitchen and decided on dip and biscuits. Harry felt very
sophisticated, dipping his cracker biscuit into the french onion dip. It was
delicious. "PlayStation?" he said, as he finished up his quota of biscuits.
"We'll go up to my room," Melody agreed.
In Melody's room, she wheeled on him. "Let's kiss," she said.
"I don't feel like kissing."
"Why not?"
"I just don't. Let's play PlayStation instead."
Melody acquiesced and they played video games for a while. But Melody kept
shifting closer to him. "Let's play husband and wives," she said, after they'd
finished their current game.
"I don't feel like it," said Harry.
Melody got to her feet. "Come on. You're the husband, and you have to go out to
work. Let me kiss you goodbye." She hauled Harry to his feet and kissed him on
the lips. "Now you have to go out to work."
Harry was relieved about that. He got to stand out on Melody's balcony while he
was 'at work' which meant she couldn't kiss him. Time passed, and Melody called
him back in. "You've finished work now," she told him.
"Hello, honey, I'm home," said Harry obligingly.
Melody ran up to him and smothered him with kisses. "I've missed you," she
said. "Let's go to bed."
"To bed?"
Melody dragged him by the hand to her bed, which had been turned down. Melody
had taken off her jumper and shoes and was just dressed in her skirt and shirt.
"Come cuddle with me," she said.
Harry was unsure what to do. She wasn't asking him to have sex, was she? He
wasn't ready for that, particularly given his conflicted feelings. He allowed
himself to lie down in the bed beside Melody.
"You can touch me if you want," she said, shyly.
"What do you mean?"
"You can kiss me. And touch me on the breast."
Tentatively, Harry kissed her. He didn't know what he was doing. He put an arm
around her and kissed her again. He didn't want to touch her on the breast.
Breasts weren't his thing. He thought of Louis, how Louis' hard body when they
snuggled together become pliant. He wanted Louis. But shouldn't he take
advantage of Melody when she was offering? After all, what if he wasn't
homosexual? What if the thing with Louis was an abberation?
Harry ghosted a hand past Melody's breast, and Melody sighed into his mouth.
No. He couldn't do this.
Harry propped himself up. "Want to play PlayStation?" he said.
"No, Harry, I want to lie here with you."
Harry sat up properly. "I don't want to lie here any longer. I want to play
PlayStation."
"You're so immature," said Melody.
"Sorry. But I really like playing video games."
Melody gave another sigh, this time in frustration. "All right," she said. "But
next time, you have to promise to lie with me. You're my boyfriend, after all."
"Okay," said Harry, happy that she wasn't pushing the point any further. They
played video games for the rest of the afternoon, until it was time for Harry
to go home. Melody wanted a kiss, of course. Harry kissed her quickly, and
mumbled a goodbye, grabbing his skateboard on the way out.
"I'll see you in school!" she called.
"Yeah. See you!" Harry skateboarded home. He was confused. He had a girlfriend.
It wasn't fair to lead her on. Should he split up with her? But he didn't want
to split up with her. He genuinely enjoyed his time with her, except for when
they were playing husbands and wives. But he didn't feel romantically towards
her. Well, he did, a bit, while he was with her. But it just wasn't the same
intensity that he felt with Louis. How could Keaton be so casual about it all?
This was important stuff.
And so what if he loved Louis? Louis didn't love him back. When Louis got hard-
ons when they were in bed together, Harry allowed himself to hope, but Louis
had never been anything other than brotherly towards him. God, he was so
confused. He fingered the cross around his neck as he skateboarded home,
thinking of his mother in heaven. Did she still love him, despite his weird
tendencies?
***** Chapter 2 *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
That night Harry lay in bed with Louis, and decided to seek what advice he
could. "Are you going to have sex with Emily?" Harry asked.
"I dunno," said Louis. "It's still too soon to tell."
"Have you ever had sex?"
"I've never gone all the way. Why are you asking?"
"I think Melody wants to have sex with me."
"What makes you think that?"asked Louis.
"She likes to play husbands and wives. This afternoon we got into bed together.
I touched her breast."
"You horndog," said Louis.
"I'm not. I don't even think I like it. What do I do?"
"What do you mean, you don't like it?"
Harry couldn't tell the truth. Instead he said, "I'm not ready."
"You know best,"said Louis. "Don't let anyone force you into something you
don't want to do. If you're not ready to have sex with Melody, you're not. I
think you're cool for being able to say so."
"Really?"
"Honestly. You should never feel pressured into having sex. It's a big deal.
You want your first time to be special, don't you?"
"So you don't want to have sex with Emily?" asked Harry.
"I told you, it's too soon to tell."
"Does she make you get a hard-on?"
"A couple of times, yeah," said Louis. "When we've been making out."
"You're gonna have sex with her," said Harry dismally.
"You've never got a hard-on with Melody?"
"No, I have, but it's different. I told you, I don't want to have sex with
Melody."
"Harry," and Louis sighed. He brought his hand up to Harry's hair. "You don't
need to rush things. You're only twelve. Stop thinking about it. When it's the
right time, it'll happen."
Keaton has said the same thing, about him being only twelve. Harry didn't feel
'only twelve'. Everything was so significant.
He stewed about it long after Louis had fallen asleep. Old feelings were
bubbling up to the surface. Feelings about how he was a bad person. He had
sexual thoughts about his brother. Imagine if his last foster father had found
out something like that. He'd get a beating every night until he'd beaten it
out of him. But Keaton had said God created him. Did God make him this way, or
was he an abberation? Was he evil for having these thoughts? Keaton didn't seem
to think it mattered, but...
Harry looked at Louis, in the bed beside him. Their heads were close together
on the pillow, close enough for Harry to feel the gentle remnants of Louis'
breath against his face. Louis lay on his side, facing Harry, his knees curled
up just a little to touch against Harry's leg, his arms folded loosely against
his chest. Louis was quite a bit bigger than Harry now, in the middle of a
growth spurt. Harry hadn't yet started growing. He could tuck his head into
Louis' neck and still not have his feet reach Louis'. He couldn't tuck his head
into Louis' neck tonight, though; Louis' arms were in the way. He settled for
curling his arms up around his own chest so that they touched against Louis'
arms, and lying nose to nose with him. The warmth where their arms met was
tangible. The warmth slipped down Harry's body, to where his leg was touching
against Louis' knees. Louis made him feel so good. How could it be bad?
***
In the afternoons, Harry often hung out with Louis and his skatehead friends at
the skateboarding rink at the park between home and school. It wasn't as good
as the mall, because it was full of kids of all ages and parents too, but the
mall was busy with cars in the afternoons. It wasn't a bad place to hang,
despite the parents. It had a large area for the kids at the front and short
ramps at the far end for the older kids to practice their Tony Hawk moves on.
Louis was particularly excited about a Doncaster-wide skateboarding competition
that was coming up in the summer holidays.
"They're going to build a vertical ramp right here and we get to compete
against each other," said Louis enthusiastically.
"But you've never been on a vertical ramp."
"I'm gonna do it. I bet I can do it. I can handle these kiddie ramps easily.
You could do it too, Haz. You've been getting better on the ramps."
"I can't do backwards turns yet."
"You know how to do backwards spins. It's the same principle. You've just got
to forget about naturally leaning forwards into the turn, and flip the board
backwards instead."
It had taken a lot of effort for Harry to get as good as he was on his
skateboard. Louis and his board were natural together, Louis' board an
extension of him. Harry was more prone to making mistakes, though he hardly
ever stacked it these days.
Louis began drilling him in backwards spins. Harry could handle them easily, he
just got nervous when he was on the ramp. Forward turns came more naturally to
him. When they'd practiced sufficiently, they moved to the children's area so
that Harry could practise turning on the undulating hills. He didn't feel too
out of place. There were plenty of twelve year olds in the area. On Louis'
instruction, he began skating up one of the slopes, and before he dropped back
down to the other side, effected a reverse turn. It worked. He didn't feel
unstable at all. He tried it a few more times.
"You're ready," Louis told him. "Ready for the ramp."
"But what if I stack it? I'll look stupid."
"Kids stack it all the time. It happens."
"It doesn't happen to you."
"I've stacked it my fair share of times. It was before you were old enough to
come out to the skate park, though. Come on. Try it."
Harry followed Louis to the ramp. Darren and Leo were currently using it.
Darren was quite good; however, as Harry watched, Leo stacked it.
"See," said Louis. "A kid two years older than you stacked it. It's nothing to
be embarrassed about."
Harry couldn't do what Louis did, start on the vertical part of the ramp. He
had to start at the bottom, gradually building up momentum as he turned and
went up the slope in either direction. Louis waited above the ramp while Harry
built up momentum. Soon Harry was cresting the ramp. He did forward turns at
first, but he knew Louis was watching, and knew he had to at least try a
backwards turn. On his next go, he crested the ramp and pulled into a backwards
turn. He wobbled a little bit as he came back down, but he did it. As he came
back up to the other side, Louis was clapping. He pulled a backwards turn
again. This time he was more confident, and didn't wobble on the way down. One
more at the far end, then he was jumping his board up to where Louis was
watching.
"I knew you could do it!" Louis patted one hand on his back, while his other
ran through Harry's hair. "Way to go, Curly! We'll get you ready for the vert
competition yet."
"Your turn," Harry told him.
"Okay." Louis balanced with the tail of his board on the lip, waiting to drop
down when the coast was clear. Off he went, threading easily past another kid
who got in his line of movement. Harry sat down on his board and watched. Louis
was fantastic to watch. He actually got airborne, despite the shallowness of
the ramp.
Leo flopped down beside Harry. He wore a backwards cap over his spiky blond
hair. When he'd first met Leo he had flat blond hair. Quickly, however, he'd
copied Louis' style of spiking up his fringe. Leo worshipped Louis, Harry knew.
"He's doing great," said Leo. "I reckon he can give those vert champs a run for
their money even if he's never done vert before."
"Do they get to practise beforehand?" asked Harry.
"Yeah, I think so. The competitors come from all over Doncaster. Some of them
have probably done vert. It would only be fair."
"Are you entering?"
"Not me," said Leo. "I'm not good enough. Darren and Cameron are entering,
though. It's gonna be great. Can't wait until the summer holidays. What about
you?"
"I've only just learned how to flip backwards. I'm not good enough either."
"Keep practising. You could do it. They've got under-thirteens, under-fifteens,
and under-seventeens divisions, as well as the eighteen-plus category."
"Maybe," said Harry.
They watched for a while as Louis continued to conquer the ramp, pulling hand-
holds and turns at will. Soon enough, he jumped up on the lip where they were
sitting and headed towards them.
"I wish this place had bigger ramps," he said. "Damned council regulations."
"I've got an uncle and aunt who've got a concrete underground pool," said Leo.
"They haven't filled it yet for summer. We could practise there."
"What, all of us? Darren and everyone?"
"Yeah, sure. The deep end is steeper than this ramp, it'll be great. I can
organise it for Saturday."
"All right," said Louis, sitting down on his board in front of Harry and Leo.
"I need the practise for the vert competition."
"You'll kill it," said Leo. "You're so good."
"I'm good on a kiddie ramp. I need a real ramp to work from."
"I'll promise, I'll organise it for Saturday."
"Cool."
It was soon five-thirty. Louis and Harry made their way home.
***
The next day, Louis didn't come to the skate park after school. Harry waited
for him on the edge of the ramp, then asked Leo, when he came, where Louis was.
"He's with Emily," said Leo.
"What do you mean?"
"He went over to her house after school. Apparently her mum and her dad both
work, so they've got the house to themselves." Leo winked at Harry.
Harry felt jealousy arise in him. "What are they doing?"
"Probably things you and I wouldn't do. Come on, you skateboarding or what?
There's hardly anyone on the ramp."
So Harry and Leo went on the ramp. Harry practised his backwards turns without
the pressure of too many people watching. After a while, they both came off for
a break. They sat with Darren and Cameron and the others.
"Is your aunt and uncle lined up for Saturday?" asked Harry of Leo.
"Yeah, we're all clear. They'll even serve cordial. They don't fill the pool
until summer, so we've probably got another few weeks of using it."
They all discussed the coolness of the arrangement. None of them had ever
skateboarded a steeper ramp than at the skateboard park, so they were all
looking forward to it.
Harry had another turn on the ramp, but eventually it was time for him to go.
He said goodbye to the boys and skateboarded home. He used his key to let
himself in.
Ms Curtis was in the kitchen. "Oh good, Harry. You can set the table. Remember
to wash your hands first."
Harry did so, and went to set the table. Niall and the others were outside.
Harry went out and joined them.
Louis was home for dinner. He didn't look any different to the way he normally
looked. Harry hoped he hadn't had sex with Emily.
It was that night, when they lay in bed together, that Harry asked him. "Did
you have sex with Emily?"
Louis sighed a deep breath through his nose. "I almost did."
"What did you do?"
"We kissed and cuddled on her bed. She touched my dick."
"What did that feel like?"
"Like... it felt good but I don't know. I couldn't let her keep doing it. She
wanted me to touch her, you know, down there, and I wasn't ready. I don't know
if I'll ever be ready."
"You're not still thinking about Coach Morrison, are you?"
Louis paused. "You don't understand, Harry."
Harry moved his arms up around Louis and snuggled him. "I want to, though."
"You're too young to be burdened with this shit."
"Do you believe Coach Morrison was evil?" asked Harry.
"I don't know. I told you, he was always nice to me. It's hard to think of him
being evil, despite what he did."
"I've been wondering if I'm evil," confessed Harry.
"You? Harry, you can't think that. You're wonderful. You're cupcakes, and
sunshine on a cloudy day, and everything that's good. You're not evil."
"What if I am?"
"What makes you say that?" Louis stroked his shoulder. "Tell me. I won't judge
you."
"I think I like boys."
Louis drew a breath in, though he kept stroking Harry. Eventually he said,
"What do you mean?"
"I don't want to have sex with Melody. It feels wrong. I like boys."
"Haz, you're so young."
"So what if I'm young?" Keaton had pointed out he was young, too. Harry had had
enough of that. "I know what I feel."
"Has any adult talked to you?" asked Louis.
"No. I'm not being molested. I just know I like boys. Do you think God will
damn me?"
"I don't believe in God," Louis reminded him. "But if there was a God, he'd
never damn you. You're one of his angels."
"But I like boys, and that's against the bible. I looked it up on the
internet."
"Don't think like that. Anyone can post an opinion on the internet. You're not
damned." Louis began stroking his hair.
"I don't know who to talk to. I talked to Keaton Black at school. He said that
there was nothing to be ashamed of, but that I was young, and I should take my
time."
"Sounds like good advice to me."
"But Louis, what should I do?" cried Harry.
"Are you interested in another guy?"
"Yes," whispered Harry.
That made Louis clutch him tight, so tight that Harry's thigh slipped between
Louis' leg. Louis had the beginnings of a hard-on, Harry could feel. He himself
also did. His hard-on was pressed against Louis' thigh.
"Harry, it's all right," whispered Louis. "There's plenty of time, you don't
need to rush things. Be sure of this guy, yeah? Are you sure of him?"
"He'd never repeat my secret," said Harry.
"How can you know?"
"I've told him all sorts of things. He doesn't judge me."
"Still, this is a big thing. Harry, you're only twelve."
"I'm sick of being only twelve. It's like no one takes me seriously."
"I take you seriously, baby," said Louis, and moved to plant a kiss on his
forehead. "Just remember, you're not evil. There's nothing wrong with liking
other boys."
"What do I do about Melody?"
"You don't need to break up with her. Just take your time. If things work out
with this other boy, you should split up with her, but I wouldn't be too
worried."
Harry clutched Louis to him. He pressed his boner more firmly against Louis.
How could he tell Louis the boy he wanted was him? Damn that Coach Morrison.
Louis had been funny about anything to do with sex since him.
Louis didn't mention Harry's hard-on. "Stay safe, won't you? Don't just blurt
things out with this other boy. I don't want you getting hurt."
"I know what I'm doing," said Harry, although he didn't know, at all.
"It's a big step," said Louis. "Promise me you'll keep safe."
"I'll keep safe."
"Good. I'd hate for you to be bullied." Louis squeezed Harry tightly. At the
same time, he moved his legs back, extracting Harry's leg from his, so that his
semi-hard-on was not pressed against Harry anymore.
Harry was confused, as usual. Louis got hard-ons with him. Did that mean he
felt the same way as Harry? Or was it just hormones, as Louis insisted. Harry
had hormones now, and while he could get randomly hard in English class or
wherever, the most times he'd gotten hard were in bed with Louis. That must
mean something, surely? But Louis had never said anything, never gave any
inkling that it was anything other than random hormones.
"Goodnight, baby," said Louis, smoothing his hair back from his forehead,
before kissing him.
"Goodnight, Louis." Harry kissed him back, bravely, on the side of his mouth.
Louis just sighed and settled down. Harry stroked Louis' back for the longest
time, until he was more than certain he was asleep. His hard-on had died down
to a semi-erect status, and once again he pressed his legs against Louis', and
fell asleep.
***
Soon it was the summer holidays, and time for the skateboarding competition.
The boys had been practicing at Leo's aunt and uncle's swimming pool for the
last couple of months. They'd all improved, even Harry.
On Thursday, the vertical skateboard ramp set up in the park. After school all
of the skateboarders in the area flocked to the skatepark. Louis and Harry were
amongst the group. Kids were practising on the ramp. They found out they could
have a go if they took a ticket and waited. Louis registered for the Saturday
event, then they took tickets and lined up to use the ramp. Each kid got a few
minutes to practise before it was the turn of the next person. Louis and Harry
waited half an hour. They weren't wasting time. They were checking out the
competition. They recognised a lot of the kids who got up and skated the ramp.
Many had a hard time with it. A few chickened out when it was their turn, so
Louis and Harry got to their turn faster.
"One at a time. One at a time only," said the man in front of the queue. "Come
on," he said to Louis. "When you hear the horn, stop, because that's the end of
your turn."
Louis quickly made their way out to the middle and began to build momentum.
Excitement built up in Harry as Louis climbed higher and higher. The ramp was
awfully high, but soon Louis was cresting the ramp, as if he'd been doing it
all his life. He was going so fast, and reaching so high. Harry saw him twist
in the air two and a half times before landing; he'd never been able to do that
on the park ramp. Harry felt the adrenalin pump up. Before he realised it, the
horn was sounding, and it was his turn. He looked around at all the other kids
watching on. Could he do it in front of such an audience?
"Your turn, kid," said the man to Harry. "Hurry up, now."
He went abreast of Louis, who was leaving the ramp. "I don't think I can do
it," he told Louis.
"Give it a go," said Louis. "It's amazing. Once you start, you won't want to
stop."
So Harry went to the centre of the ramp, and pushed off from the bottom.
Gradually, his momentum built up. He was more than halfway up the ramp, now,
and equal parts scared and excited. What if he fell from here? It was a long
way to the bottom. His helmet only gave him so much protection. He could break
an arm, or a leg.
Excitement won out, and he pushed on. He partially crested the ramp and came
back down. That was awesome. Adrenaline kept pumping. Now he was on the other
side, and coming up even higher. Just when he began to leave the ramp, he
twisted his board. He wasn't going to try backwards turns, not on this ramp.
Going forwards would be good enough. He landed well and was quickly shooting up
the ramp again. It was addictive, being this high.
Before he was ready, his turn was up. He came back over to where Louis was
waiting on the sidelines. Louis clapped him on the back. "You did great."
"I was too scared to do any backwards turns."
"That's okay. You did it, and that's all that matters." Louis pulled him away.
"So, are you going to enter the under-thirteens division?"
"I'm not sure."
"You may as well enter; if worst comes to worst, you can just pull out."
"There's a registration fee, though."
"It's only five pounds. Come on." Louis dragged him up to the registration
area.
Nervously, Harry handed across his fee and they took down his details. "Bring
this receipt with you on Saturday," said the man, "and you can collect your
wristband which marks you as a competitor. You'll need it to enter the
competitor's area."
"This is going to be so much fun," said Louis, as Harry walked away, clutching
his receipt.
"We'll have to tell Ms Curtis."
"She doesn't have to know."
"She does. How else are we going to explain where we are all Saturday?"
"If she sees the ramp she'll freak out at us going on it."
"We'll just say we're going to a skateboard competition at the skatepark," said
Harry. "She's let us go to Leo's cousin's house the past couple of months.
She'll let us do this."
"Just don't tell her about the ramp," said Louis.
"I won't."
Back at home they explained to Ms Curtis where they'd be spending Saturday.
"Please don't stop us from going," said Louis. "We've already paid registration
fees."
"Well, I don't suppose it's much different to what you normally get up to on a
Saturday," said Ms Curtis. "You'll have to take a packed lunch. I don't want
you starving."
"I don't want to carry a lunchbox around with me. There'll be food vendors
there."
"Serving hot dogs and chips and all sorts of rubbish food, I suppose."
"It's just a one-off," repeated Louis. "We're not going to die of cholesterol
after just one hot dog."
Ms Curtis acquiesced. "Make sure you look after Harry, won't you?"
"Always," said Louis.
 
***
Saturday dawned. Harry woke up to the feel of Louis cuddling him tightly.
"Time to get up. It's the skateboard competition," he told Harry joyfully.
"You woke me up, you idiot."
"But isn't it exciting?"
"I'm nervous."
"A little bit of nerves is good for you," said Louis. "I'm nervous too, but I'm
more excited. Come on, let's get up and get down there."
Harry's division, the under-thirteens, started at 8:30am. Louis' division
started at 11:00am. They ate breakfast and made their way down to the
skatepark. Harry wore one of Louis' hand-me-down hoodies while Louis wore his
favourite beanie. It was only eight in the morning, but crowds had already
started gathering. A few rides had been put up near the rink, so that everyone
could have a good time. The vertical ramp had been set up in front of the grass
embankment so that spectators could all get a clear view of the action. Harry
and Louis went to show their receipts and receive writsbands. Harry's was red;
Louis' was green.
"We'll call you in alphabetical order," the man who gave them the wristbands
told them. "Young'un, you'll probably be up around 10:00am. And you," he
addressed Louis, "will have to wait until half past midday. But keep an ear out
for the announcements. Gather at the marshalling area fifteen minutes before
you're due. Here's a program so you'll know what to listen out for."
They poured over the program. It listed both their names.
"I'll easily know when to head to the marshalling area," said Louis. "Cameron's
two before me. His last name is Sutcliffe. We've got a few minutes before the
action starts. Let's go on a ride."
Louis and Harry went on the Twister. The Twister shifted them about this way
and that, going up and down in the air. They kept crashing into each other,
with giggles.
"You're heavy!" exclaimed Harry.
"Sorry, Haz. I keep losing my grip--oh." Louis crashed into Harry again.
In truth, Harry didn't mind. He liked the body contact. He only pretended to
prostest as Louis leaned against him.
Then it was eight-thirty, and the competition had started. Louis and Harry sat
down on their skateboards on the embankment, towards the top. Harry's division
was up first. The first couple of boys weren't very good; they both stacked it.
The third boy was better, but Harry wasn't outclassed until the fourth boy, who
was able to pull off his turns with ease and didn't stack it.
"He was good," said Louis.
"Yeah. Better than me."
"Don't put yourself down, Harry. You're just as good, given you've had hardly
any practice on a vert."
Time passed quickly. Darren and Leo and the gang rocked up, sitting down around
Harry and Louis. After every turn they graded the performer's score. Harry kept
an eye on the program. When Peter Rigan was up, Harry knew it was soon to be
his turn. He stood up.
"Want me to come with you?" Louis asked him.
"No. I can do it by myself."
"Best of luck, Curly."
The other boys chorused their well-wishes, too. Harry went down to the
marshalling area, showing his wristband, feeling chuffed at the well-wishes.
Peter Rigan finished, then Sam Smith had his turn. Then they were calling out,
"Harry Styles".
Butterflies rose in his stomach. He felt a little nauseus as he made his way
out to the middle of the ramp. He hesitated for a moment. He didn't look at the
crowd watching because he'd never be able to do it then. Taking a deep breath,
he started up, quickly gathering momentum. It began to feel fun. Before he knew
it, he was cresting the ramp. He did a forward turn and came back down. He was
pumped. He went into another turn. Did he dare try a 540? No, he did not. But
he did a backwards turn. He didn't wobble at all. He threw himself into the
ride, feeling exhilarated.
Before too long, the horn sounded, and he slowed to a stop. The judges were
lined up at a table in front of the ramp. He smiled and waved at them, and a
couple waved back. He went back up to Louis and the boys, feeling on top of the
world.
Louis stood up, his face flushed. "Well done, Curly. You looked really good out
there." He pulled Harry in for a one-armed hug, Harry's skateboard getting in
the way of a full hug. The other boys congratulated him too. Harry sat down
once again beside Louis, feeling bouyed. He wasn't going to place in the top
three, he knew, but he did all right for someone so inexperienced on such a
high ramp.
Soon enough, the under-thirteens division ended. One of the judges stood up to
the loudspeaker to announce the winners. They counted down ten places. Harry
came seventh, although he didn't get a ribbon or anything. The ribbons and gift
certificates were for the top three. Harry was ecstatic just to have come
seventh. All the boys were equally as pleased.
"You did us proud," said Darren, ruffling his hair. "Seventh! That's
fantastic."
"We'll have to work really hard to beat you," said Cameron.
The under-fifteens started. Darren was soon up, because his surname was Barlow.
They watched as Darren took his turn. He'd been practicing hard at Leo's
cousin's pool, and it showed. The boys all made sure to pat him on the back
when he came back up to them. "You could get top three," said Cameron.
"Nah. It's early days yet," said Darren. "Still a ton of kids to go."
It was another hour before Cameron was up. As Cameron was announced, Louis
stood up. "I'd better get down to the marshalling area," he said.
"Good luck, Louis!" chorused his friends.
Harry watched Loius' course down the embankment as the others watched Cameron.
Once the ground levelled out Louis made it to the marshalling area. Only then
did he turn his gaze to watch Cameron. Cameron did well, although not as well
as Darren. He stopped his board at the horn and saluted the judges, before
making his way back to where they hung out. All the boys, including Harry,
congratulated him. Then they waited with bated breath for Louis.
After a couple more boys, it was Louis' turn. He went out to the middle of the
ramp and began his takeoff. He quickly built up momentum and began pulling
turns as he crested the ramp. He did 540s with ease, both backwards and
forwards. Then, at one particularly high launch, he tried for two and a half
turns at once. He landed it, only wobbling a bit as he came down. Harry felt
pride rise up in him. Only a couple of boys had landed one of those.
Louis waved to the judges then came back up to their group. They all stood up
to congratulate him.
"That was fantastic," said Leo.
"I reckon you're good enough to win," said Darren. "I haven't seen anyone to
beat you."
They all sat back down and waited until the end of the under-fifteens. There
was silence for a few minutes, before one of the judges stood up to announce
the winners. Once again, they counted down from ten. Darren got sixth place.
Then the judge got to number three.
He announced a name that Harry didn't quite catch, but it definitely wasn't
Louis Tomlinson. The named boy came up, all smiles, and accepted his ribbon.
When was Louis going to be called out? He'd definitely been in the top ten.
"Second place goes to," the judge paused, "Louis Tomlinson."
Their whole gang jumped to their feet. Hugs were all around, until Louis had to
break off to go and accept his ribbon. Harry watched as he went up to the
judge, and the judge pinned the ribbon onto him. He felt so proud he was
bursting. Louis had got second!
He didn't bother to listen to who had got first, solely focussing on Louis
coming up the embankment again. He flung himself at Louis as Louis reached
them.
"You're so wonderful," Harry said, embracing Louis.
"Settle down, I only got second."
"You should have won," said Harry firmly, not letting him go.
"Nah, I wobbled on one of my landings. But I'm happy."
"You rule," Darren told him, taking over from Harry.
"Yeah, mate, you killed it," said Leo, hugging him on the side. All the boys
hugged him. Louis looked ecstatic. He had the blue ribbon embossed with the
sponsor's name and the event pinned to his shirt and carried a gift certificate
from Skate Pro.
Eventually the gang let him go and they sat back down to watch the under-
seventeens compete. Harry snuggled in close to Louis.
"Can I touch your ribbon?" he asked.
"Of course." Louis presented his chest to Harry. Harry stroked the ribbon. It
felt smooth under his touch. "You hungry?" said Louis. He swivelled around. "Do
you lads want to eat something?"
"Fetch me a hot dog, extra sauce," said Darren, pulling out some money. "I'll
look after the boards."
Harry, Louis and Leo went to get the food while the others waited with the
skateboards, saving their space. When they saw Louis' ribbon, several strangers
stopped to congratulate him. Louis was chuffed. Harry walked proudly alongside
him. They collected hot dogs for the gang and made their way back to continue
watching the action. They graded the skateboarders, made bets on who would win,
and joked around.
"What are you going to buy at Skate Pro?" Harry asked Louis.
"I'm going to upgrade my skateboard. I've got some money saved to cover the
cost. This one has had it."
Harry agreed. The design was rubbing off, the grip tape was all cracked, and
the trucks had gouges dug into them from grinding. "Have you ever been to Skate
Pro?"
Darren said, "Skate Pro's rad. I bought my board there."
"It's supposed to be bigger than Mick's," said Louis.
"I like Mick's," said Harry. Occasionally they would take the bus and go there
on a Saturday afternoon just to hang out. They took their boards and, when they
weren't in the shop watching DVDs or pouring through skate mags, would perform
tricks in the alley. The shop assistants never hassled them to buy anything.
"I do, too," said Louis. "But I'd be foolish not to use the voucher for a new
skateboard when I need one so badly. I've been saving for months, now. I
thought it would be next year before I got one."
"I'll come down with you next Saturday to Skate Pro," said Darren. "I know
which bus to catch."
"I'll come too," said Leo.
"And me," said Harry.
"Let's all go. I haven't been there before, either," said Cameron.
All the lads agreed that they'd go. There was going to be quite a group turning
up at Skate Pro next Saturday.
Chapter End Notes
     Sorry this is skatehead heavy. The plot thickens in the next chapter.
***** Chapter 3 *****
Louis pinned his ribbon on the cork board in his and Harry's room. It sat up
there with the athletics ribbons he'd earned; firsts in the school competition,
thirds in the interschool competition. Louis' growth spurt meant that he was
now of average height, no longer the small boy he'd been. He was taller than
Liam, now. He was the tallest of them all. Harry was still the shortest.
On the next Saturday, the gang took the bus to Skate Pro. Louis brought the
voucher, and the money he'd saved. Hopefully it would be enough to get a
quality board. Harry brought all of his money, too. He didn't know why, he just
did.
It was exciting, going to a new skateboarding shop. Skate Pro was situated just
near a shopping mall and was much busier than Mick's. It was divided into two
sections; gear, and boards. To get to the boards you had to bypass all of the
skateboarding gear; cool stuff like shirts and jackets and cargo trousers.
Harry wanted a pair of cargo trousers. Right now, he could afford them, but was
it really wise to spend all of his savings on a pair of trousers?
They went into the second room, where the boards were. The middle wall was in
Louis' price range. The boys enthusiastically helped Louis with his choice.
Names like Toy Machine, Element, and Plan B were thrown about. Louis checked
out a few but wasn't content. He looked with longing at the right wall.
"I want a Blitz deck," he said. "That's Tony Hawk's brand." He pulled a board
off the wall and examined it.
"Once you add the trucks and wheels, that's out of your price range," said
Darren.
"Maybe I can bargain the guy down."
"May as well give it a go."
Louis took the deck over to the counter. "How much for this?" he asked.
"Like it says on the price tag," said the shop assistant.
Louis fished out his voucher. "I won this. I want to use it as part-payment,
but I don't have enough money for trucks and stuff if I have to pay that much
for the board."
The shop assistant looked interested at his voucher, but said, "Are your
friends buying anything?"
"Yeah, I want this shirt," said Darren, pulling a shirt off the rack.
"I'm gonna get this hoodie," said Cameron.
"Look, I can knock it down by ten percent," said the shop assistant. "That's as
good a deal as I can do."
Louis conferred with the others. Now he could afford the deck, but didn't have
enough money to cover the trucks and wheels.
"I'll pay the difference," said Harry.
"Harry, what? You can't do that. It's your allowance."
"You can pay me back," said Harry. "I have the money right here."
Louis' eyes fixated as Harry drew his money out of his pocket. "But Haz, that's
all your savings."
"You're only borrowing it."
"I'll have to get a part-time job. I'm nearly old enough to."
"Whatever. Take what you need," said Harry, pushing the money at him.
Louis looked deeply into Harry's eyes. Realising he was sincere, he took
twenty-five pounds from Harry's hand. "This'll be enough."
"You're not compromising on quality?"
"No." He approached the shop assistant once again. The shop assistant collected
trucks and bearings and wheels and offered to put the board together for him.
Soon, Louis had a brand-new board.
"Thank you so much," he told the shop assistant. He waited impatiently while
the shop assistant rang up Darren's and Cameron's purchases, and then they all
left. Louis immediately dropped his new board down to the pavement and rode it.
He rode it to the end of the block. They all had their boards with them, and
followed him.
"How is it?" asked Darren.
"It's great. It's so smooth compared to my last board."
"I don't know how you rode that board, it was really stuffed up."
"I was used to it. Now I'll have to get used to a new board." Louis kicked the
board up into his hand. " It won't take long. It's really smooth. Thank you so
much, Harry. I'll pay you back every week from my allowance."
"No problem," said Harry.
Louis slung an arm around his shoulders. "You're the bestest brother."
"You'd do the same for me," said Harry with conviction.
Louis kissed him on the side of the head. The other boys didn't care; they were
used to the affection between Louis and Harry. They accepted it as part of
their brotherly bond.
"Let's go back to the skatepark, try out your new board," said Darren.
Soon after, the bus came, and they all crammed onto it, taking up the back of
the bus with their presence and their boards. The other passengers stayed away
from them. Harry supposed they were rather loud, yelling across the aisles at
each other. They poured out back at the skatepark and Louis was able to put his
board though its paces. It passed with flying colours.
"This board is great," Louis told Harry, and Harry felt very happy for him. He
deserved it.
***
On the first Wednesday back at school after the summer holidays, Louis was
called up to administration over the school's public address system. At
lunchtime, Harry went to find out what it was all about. Louis hadn't got into
trouble for a long time.
Louis was with Jason and company, his football friends, and they were kicking a
football back and forth, trying not to let it touch the ground. Louis saw Harry
and broke away from the game.
"What's up?" he asked.
"Why did you get called to admin?"
"Ms Curtis had a message for me. My social worker's coming over after school,
so I have to go straight home." They didn't have personal phones as they were
too expensive, so Ms Curtis wouldn't have been able to contact him in any other
way.
"Why didn't the social worker give you any notice? Normally we get plenty of
notice when they're coming over."
"This is a special visit," said Louis. "I don't know what it's about. The
message didn't say."
"Maybe you're getting to see your sisters again." Harry knew Louis missed his
four sisters dreadfully.
"I hope so. I can't think what else it would be about."
"At least you're not in trouble," said Harry. "I was worried."
"I don't get into trouble anymore. This high school's a much nicer place than
primary school was." He looked back at his friends. "Want to hang out, play
some football?"
"You know I'm hopeless at it. I'm going to hang around Melody. All the boys are
hanging around the girls this lunchtime."
Louis pulled him more to the side, and whispered in his ear. "Has Melody
pressured you into having sex?"
"She still likes to play husbands and wives. She took her top off last time we
lay in bed. She only had her bra on. I didn't know what to do."
"Just tell her you're not ready."
"I tried, but she brushes it off. She really likes me."
"What about this boy you said you like?" said Louis. "What's happening there?"
"I like him, that's all. I don't think I dare tell him."
"Maybe that's for the best. You don't want to come out at the age of twelve.
There's plenty of time."
"But I feel like I'm lying to everyone."
"You're not," said Louis, patting him reassuringly. "How can you be lying, when
you've never said either way? Other people should be more accepting, that's
all. They shouldn't assume everyone likes girls."
"But they do," said Harry.
"I know. Have you thought about telling Ms Curtis yet?"
"No. I'm not ready to tell anyone except you."
"I've been okay, haven't I? I haven't made you feel bad."
"No, you've been great."
"Lou!" called Jason. "You coming back?"
"Yeah, just give me a minute," said Louis.
"I'd better get along to my friends," said Harry.
"Okay. Are you going to the skatepark after school?"
"Not without you. Maybe I'll go get icecream with Melody."
"Be careful with her. You don't want to hurt her."
"I'm just so confused," said Harry.
The football sailed over to Louis. Louis kicked it up in the air a couple of
times, and sent it back.
"I don't blame you for being confused," said Louis. "Know that whenever you
want to talk, I'm here for you."
"I know. I'd better go back to Melody and the boys."
Louis ruffled his hair, and Harry went back into the Year Eight courtyard where
his friends were hanging out.
After school, Melody wanted him to come back to her house, but Harry said no.
He wanted to find out what was happening with Louis and the social worker. The
social worker's car was in their driveway when he got home. He let himself into
the house with his key, and Ms Curtis came up to him immediately.
"Harry. Either go outside or go to your room."
"Why?"
"Louis is having a visit with his social worker."
The trouble with such a small house was there wasn't anywhere to sit except the
meals table, and Louis and the social worker were currently seated there.
"But I'm hungry," said Harry.
"I'll bring you some cheese and biscuits. Now, what will it be, your room or
outside?"
"I guess I can do homework," said Harry, heading off to his and Louis' room. He
couldn't help but glance over at Louis and the social worker. Louis sat in his
usual place at the head of the table and the social worker sat adjacent to him.
They were both whispering. Louis caught Harry's eye for a moment. He looked
panicked. Harry wondered what they were talking about.
Niall, Liam and Zayn were dispatched to their rooms when they came home. Ms
Curtis brought them all cheese and biscuits and slices of apple. Instead of
doing homework, Harry went and hung out in Niall's and Liam's room. Zayn was
there, too.
"What's so important that we can't hear what's going on?" said Zayn, eating
from his plate of food.
"He looked scared," said Liam. "Mum wouldn't move him to another foster home,
would she?" Liam had called Ms Curtis 'Mum' for a long time now, as had Zayn
and Niall. "He's been on his best behaviour lately."
"She wouldn't," said Harry, certain. "Ms Curtis loves all of us. She doesn't
want to give us up."
"Louis in the past has been pretty hard to love, though," pointed out Zayn. "He
got into fights, he used to get detention all the time."
"He hasn't since he's been in Year Eight," Harry defended Louis. "That's two
years of good behaviour."
"All I know," said Liam, "is I've never seen that expression on his face
before."
The boys speculated, and came up with more wild ideas, but none of them were
satisfactory. They would have to wait to ask Louis himself.
Eventually, they heard the social worker leaving. The boys walked up through
the passage into the main room.
"What's going on, Louis?" asked Niall.
Louis looked pale. His fourteen year old face showed the strain. "Nothing," he
said.
"You only saw your social worker recently," continued Niall. "What did she want
with you?"
"I don't want to talk about it. I've got homework to do." Louis brushed past
them on the way to his and Harry's room. The boys looked at each other. It was
obvious they weren't satisfied with Louis' answers.
"Harry, try to get the truth out of him," urged Zayn. "You're closest to him."
Harry didn't have the opportunity before dinner. Louis collected his homework
and took it out to the meals table, letting Harry work at the desk in their
room. He was distant even for the short period of time they were in the room
together. Harry didn't want to discuss it at dinner with the others. He hoped
to catch Louis in their bedroom after dinner, but Louis went straight off to
have a shower. Instead of returning, he went out and watched TV, even though
Louis wasn't that much into TV and would much rather hang out in their room,
playing music or strumming awkwardly at the guitar Ms Curtis had picked up from
charity. Niall was the best at guitar. He practised for hours.
Harry got into bed at the usual time, but lay awake, waiting for Louis. Just as
he was drifting off to sleep, Louis came into the room and got into bed. Louis
was always considerate; he didn't turn the light on but rather got changed in
the dark.
Harry waited some more, then slipped out of bed. He made his way past the piles
of clothes on the floor to Louis' bed. "Louis. Can I come in?"
"Little monkey, of course you can."
Gratified, Harry lifted back the covers and crawled in beside Louis. Louis was
on his back. Harry lay on his back, too, not wanting to crowd Louis, who he
guessed from his conduct earlier tonight was sensitive.
"I'm thinking about breaking up with Melody," said Harry.
"No, really? You've been together for so long."
"She keeps pressuring me into playing husbands and wives. She wanted me to go
back to her place after school. I know what she wanted."
"It's not the girl that's supposed to be the agressor; it's supposed to be the
guy."
"Melody's definitely the agressor," said Harry.
"I don't know what to say, Haz. You don't want to lead her on if you're not
willing to go as far as she wants to. Maybe you should break up with her."
"That's different to what you said last time."
"Last time she wasn't putting so much pressure on you."
"I like her," said Harry. "But how I'd like a friend, not how I'd like a
girlfriend... or boyfriend."
"You still hung up on this boy?" said Louis.
"It's not going to go away."
"Harry... Keaton Black's old enough to deal with the fall out. You, you're only
a Year Eight. People are mean. They'll get at you. And you don't know if the
boy returns your feelings. He could ruin your reputation."
"You always care so much about rep."
"It's important, Harry. Anything that saves you from being bullied--and I know
there's bullies in your year so don't pretend there isn't--anything that saves
you from being bullied is worth it." Louis hugged him. "I couldn't stand it if
you were bullied. I'd have to get involved, and you know what that means."
"Detentions and suspensions," said Harry, all too familiar with the Louis of
old.
"Please think carefully about it, if you ever decide to tell him."
Harry enjoyed the feeling of being bundled up in Louis' arms. He slung an arm
around Louis' back, returning the hug. He wanted to stay enveloped in this
feeling, but he had to ask. "Louis? What happened with the social worker this
afternoon?"
Louis pulled away from him and lay on his back once again. "You don't want to
know."
"I do. You looked really strange."
Louis breathed deeply in and out. "I can't say it."
"Please Louis. We don't keep secrets from each other."
Louis breathed deeply a few more times. "It's... it's my father."
Harry was confused. "What about your father?"
"He wants me back."
Harry took a few moments to process the thought. "What, he wants you to live
with him?"
Louis shuddered out a breath. "Yeah."
"But how can he? How can he just come back into your life after all this time?
He's had nothing to do with you."
"He's gotten remarried. He wants me back. It doesn't make sense to me, either."
"He's totally ignored you!"
"He's applied to the court for custody. Apparently he can't just have me.
There's a legal process to go through, because he hasn't been in my life for so
long. Ms Curtis is going to help me."
"If it's a competition between Ms Curtis and your dad, Ms Curtis will win,"
said Harry confidently.
"She might not. Everyone has to be assessed by a psychologist. Including Ms
Curtis. Including me. You know what psychologists are like."
Harry had experience of psychologists. Apart from the relaxation techniques
taught to him, he thought they did more harm than good. Certainly Louis thought
so.
"I've got an appointment with the court-appointed psychologist next week," said
Louis. "What should I do? I could misbehave, but that could make Ms Curtis look
bad. So I have to behave well. But what if the psychologist thinks I'm well
adjusted enough to take the change?"
"Just tell the psychologist you don't want to live with your dad," said Harry.
"They have to listen."
"But Ms Curtis has never adopted me. If she'd adopted me he'd have a harder
time. I'm still just a foster kid, in limbo. I know what the courts are like.
They try to make sure family is with family."
"Will you get to testify?"
"You bet I will. And I'll be demanding to stay with Ms Curtis. I don't have any
memories of my father; he never saw me after he divorced my mother and he's
never wanted to see me the whole time I've been in foster care. Most
importantly," and Louis wrapped his arms around Harry once again, "I can't lose
you."
"You'll never lose me," promised Harry, returning the hug. "They can't make you
go." Surely the decision was up to Louis. Louis was the one affected by it all.
"They're the courts," said Louis pessimistically. "They can make me do anything
they want to."
Harry just held on tight to him. He never wanted to let him go.
***
The next evening, while Louis was in the shower, Ms Curtis came and knocked on
the doorframe of the bedroom. "Is it okay if I come in?" she said.
Harry sat up from where he was lounging on his bed, reading. "Yes."
Ms Curtis came in and sat down at the desk's chair, facing Harry. "Harry, I
love you very much. You know that, don't you?" Harry nodded. This sounded like
a serious conversation. "You don't have to say yes, but I was wondering how
you'd feel about adoption?"
"You mean, you adopting me?"
"I want to. If you'd like."
"What about the others?"
"I want to adopt all of you, but it's going to be hard with Zayn's and Liam's
parents still alive. I should be able to adopt you and Niall without too much
trouble as you've no immediate family, but the others... all the boys have told
me they want to be adopted so I'm going to do my best."
"Are you going to try and adopt Louis, too?"
"Yes. I should have done this years ago. I just never thought anything like
this would happen. I don't know what I was thinking; I should have known
better."
"I want to be adopted," said Harry, coming forward to hug her.
"I'll look into what I have to do tomorrow," promised Ms Curtis, hugging him
back.
***
Louis had his appointment with the psychologist. While Harry waited after
school for him, he and the boys played football. The season was starting up
again and they all, Niall in particular, were keen to get some practise in.
Harry enjoyed playing but wasn't very good at it; his keeping skills weren't
bad because he'd had a lot of practise in that position, but his kicking and
intercept skills were lacking. Without Louis there they couldn't have a proper
match, so they just played kick-to-kick.
They heard Ms Curtis' van pull up in the driveway.
"Louis should be coming out soon," said Zayn. But Louis didn't appear.
"That means things went badly, doesn't it?" said Liam after a few minutes.
"I'll go ask him to come play," said Niall, and jogged into the house. He came
back with Louis, togged up in his football boots, so it couldn't be too bad.
Harry shifted to goal, and they played two-a-side with their usual pairings;
Louis and Zayn versus Niall and Liam. Louis and Niall were the two best players
so they never got to be on a team together, for fairness' sake.
"How did the appointment with the shrink go?" asked Niall.
"He wasn't a shrink, he was a psychologist," said Louis.
"Whatever. How did it go?"
"I don't know." Louis intercepted a pass that Liam had intended for Niall.
"Concentrate on your football, Niall." He passed off to Zayn, who had a shot on
goal, and put one through Harry's defences.
As Harry went to fetch the ball, Niall said, "What do you mean you don't know?"
"I don't know what I was supposed to be aiming for, so I don't know how it
went," clarified Louis.
"Yeah, because you don't know whether you were helping your father, or Mum,"
said Zayn.
"That's exactly it. But I made Ms Curtis sound like the best mum in the world,
so I did the best I could. Let's not talk about it anymore, now."
Harry waited to throw the ball back into play, because everyone seemed to have
stopped.
"Ms Curtis is moving forwards on our adoptions, she told me," said Niall.
"Nothing's certain so far, but she's hoping."
"My parents are so fucked up, they'll probably resist, just to be bastards,"
said Zayn.
"I'm worried about my parents, too," said Liam. "Even if they've never visited
me."
"You should be," said Louis. "If my dad can turn around and suddenly want me,
who's to say it won't happen to you?"
Liam shivered. "I hope the adoption goes through," he said. "If any
psychologists want to talk to me, that's what I'll be telling them."
"Me and Harry should be okay," said Niall. "I'm just worried about you guys."
"If the adoption people worry as much about bedrooms as my father's lawyers,
you won't necessarily be safe," said Louis.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, they're pushing the fact that I'd get my own bedroom if I lived with
my dad."
"But I don't mind sharing," Liam said to Niall. "Do you?"
"No."
"And I like sharing with you, Louis," said Harry.
"I don't know if they'll care," said Louis. "They seem to think children need
their own bedrooms, even though I learnt in Social Studies that it was a fairly
modern belief, born of the rising middle class."
"Ugh, don't talk about classes with me," said Niall. "We're doing them right
now. I don't get it."
"If you need any help," said Louis, "I can help you."
"Thanks. I'll take you up on it. It's hard for an Irish boy, learning UK
history for the first time."
"Want to get into it now?"
"Yeah, all right," said Niall, surprised. Louis would generally play football
or skateboard until called in for tea.
Louis clapped Niall on the back. "Right. Let's go."
Zayn, Liam and Harry exchanged looks as Niall and Louis went off into the house
together.
"I think Louis is upset about his psychologist appointment," said Liam.
"What, he can't do a nice thing?" said Harry.
"Of course he can. He's done nice things for me before, helped me with my
Maths, for example. It's just... he wouldn't normally leave a game of
football."
"Especially not when he's winning," said Zayn.
"I don't feel like playing football anymore," said Harry, worried about Louis.
"Nor do I," said Liam and Zayn in unison.
They walked back to the verandah, Harry depositing the football next to the
skateboards. Liam and Zayn went inside, while Harry took his skateboard out the
front. He practised tricks until the sun went down and it was dinner time,
wondering all the while about Louis.
***
Louis watched TV, unusually, after tea, so Harry didn't get to talk to him. It
was only in the intimate small hours, when they slept together, that he could
ask Louis.
"Harry, we really shouldn't sleep together," said Louis as they came back from
checking the house, but he sounded resigned.
Harry crawled into Louis' bed anyway. "What's your excuse this time?"
"I'm turning fifteen in a couple of months."
"And I'm turning thirteen. I still want to sleep with you."
"Baby... if my dad gets custody, we won't be able to be together anymore."
"Don't say that."
"It's true, though," said Louis. I told you, he's offered me a room by myself.
The courts will look upon that more favourably than me sleeping in with you. Ms
Curtis' house is crowded."
"Get into bed," said Harry, as Louis was still hovering beside it.
Loius sighed, crawled over Harry, and settled in against the wall. "I just wish
I knew what he was up to. He can't really want me. Not after all this time."
"How did the psychologist's appointment go, really?" asked Harry.
"I tell you, I don't know. I kept repeating I didn't want to live with my dad,
but I don't know if the psychologist will listen. I don't know how much say the
psychologist has over everything. In the meantime, my dad's got visiting
rights."
"What does visiting rights mean?"
"He gets to see me every second Sunday, until the court case is over with. But
I don't want to see him."
Harry couldn't imagine, having his parents alive and them not wanting him. He
didn't understand what Louis' father was doing. After all this time, to
suddenly decide he wanted Louis? It wasn't fair. Not fair to any of them. "They
can't make you, if you don't want to see him."
"They can. He's got rights, too."
Harry bundled up Louis in his arms, slipping a leg between Louis'. He was safe
to do so, because he didn't have a hard-on. Louis clutched him back tightly.
"Haz," said Louis, whispering warmly into his neck, "you're so fucking precious
to me."
"You're precious to me, too."
"I can't believe this could end."
"It won't," said Harry confidently. "Ms Curtis is the best mother. They can't
take you away from her."
"It's not up to Ms Curtis."
"Your dad's a horrible parent. Anyone can see that."
"He reckons he's reformed. That he wants family back together, under one roof.
He's got a daughter, you know."
"Over my dead body," said Harry.
"Don't say that."
"You said it once. Only over your dead body you'd let anyone hurt me again."
Louis sighed. "I meant it, too. I still mean it. I'll always come after you. If
my dad wins custody, I won't go. I'll stay here. They'll have to get the
psychiatric emergency team out again to make me go."
"I don't want to see them, ever again," said Harry.
"Nor do I. Hospital was a horrible place. Harry..." Louis trailed off.
"What?"
Louis clutched him tight. "I have a bad feeling about this."
Harry wriggled against him, trying to transmit his love. "Don't say that."
"Monkey," said Louis. "I love you so much." He kissed Harry on the temple.
"I love you, too."
"Let's not talk about it anymore. Sleep."
Harry was tired. He loosened his grip a little. "You sleep, too."
"I will."
Still Harry couldn't shake the feeling, even as the warmth of their bodies
caused him to drift to sleep, that Louis wouldn't be sleeping much tonight.
***
Then all of a sudden it was Sunday, and Louis was heading off to see his dad
for the first time in many many years. They were meeting at a relationships
centre, to take make things easier for everyone. Ms Curtis drove him. Harry
wanted to come along for the ride, but Ms Curtis said he would be distracting,
so he, along with the other boys, waved them off.
"Let's go down to the mall," said Zayn, so the four of them locked up the house
and headed down to the mall, which was close to the high school. They met
others of their peers down there and all went to hang out outside the front of
the mall, where the trolleys were returned. There was quite a group of them. A
security guard came up and told them they were disturbing customers, and could
they please move on. Zayn stood up and said they had a perfect right to be
there. The security guard shot back that they were loitering, and could be
charged by police. At that, several of them stood up and challenged the
security guard. Harry felt nervous. He didn't want to get into trouble with the
police. It all ended. however, when Niall stood up and said they were going in
the mall to get something to eat. The security guard couldn't stop them.
He followed them, however, all the way into the food hall, and scrutinised them
as they visited the Chinese place, the Italian place, the KFC, the Indian
place, to get their meals. They all sat down along the side of a large fake
plant, sitting either side of the tables. The security guard still watched
them.
"Hope he's getting a thrill," said Niall, tucking into his KFC.
"Dunno what he thinks he's doing," said one of the other boys.
They spent their meal laughing at the security guard, who seemed determined to
get them into trouble for some reason. Eventually, however, he left, and
everyone could relax.
"What was that guy's problem?" said Zayn.
"I guess he doesn't like young people," said Niall.
"What a wanker."
They all finished eating, and then Harry said to Niall, Zayn and Liam, "I'm
going home."
"Louis won't be back yet. He was supposed to have two hours," said Zayn.
"I'm still going back. I want to be there for him."
"You sure you don't want the security guard harrassing you some more?"
"No," said Harry. "I don't like him."
"Louis would have something to say, if he were here."
"You bet he would," said Harry.
Zayn ruffled his hair and Niall patted him on the back, and Harry left. He got
home and let himself in with the key around his neck. He was the only one home.
He paced for around half an hour until Ms Curtis and Louis drove up, when he
ran out to see what was going on.
"How was it?" Harry asked a strained looking Louis.
"Torture. He's a total stranger. Imagine spending two hours with a total
stranger." Louis turned to Ms Curtis. "I don't want to do it again. Do I have
to?"
"I'm afraid that every second Sunday is what he's allowed," said Ms Curtis. "I
can't stop it. Not until the court case is decided one way or another."
"When's that going to happen?"
"Not for a while. The courts don't move quickly, I'm afraid. He's been granted
an interim order."
"I just hope Zayn's and Liam's families leave them alone," said Louis, as he
walked beside Harry into the house.
"Where are the others?' said Ms Curtis, upon entering and finding things quiet.
"At the mall," said Harry.
"All right. Louis, do you want me to get you a late lunch? I know you couldn't
eat before you had to see your father."
"Yes, please," said Louis.
"A ham and cheese sandwich?"
"That's great, thanks." Louis sat down at the head of the table, where he
always sat.
"Harry?"
"No thanks, I ate already." Harry sat down in his own chair, adjacent to Louis.
"What happened, really?" he said, when Ms Curtis went back into the kitchen.
"My dad saw me. He tortured me. Then he left."
"He tortured you?"
"Just by being there. I honestly didn't even recognise him. He could have been
any man on the street. And it was a supervised visit, so there was another
stranger there, too."
"Why was it surpervised?" asked Harry.
"Part of the court order," said Louis. "Just for the first visit, though. Next
time he's taking me to his house. He's going to show me where my room will be
and everything. He's getting a bed for me already, can you believe? And I'm
going to meet my half-sister."
"Did he say why he wanted you after all these years?"
"Just that he'd settled down, it was his third marriage, and it was time for
family to be together. I challenged him as to why he'd never wanted to see me
before, and he said he'd been in a bad place for a number of years, but that
he'd got his life sorted out now."
Ms Curtis came out just then with Louis' sandwich. She sat down at the table in
Zayn's seat. "Your father knows I want to adopt you," she said to Louis. "Our
lawyers have already contacted his. He said to me he'd fight it every step of
the way."
"I'm nearly fifteen," said Louis. "Why doesn't what I have to say matter?"
"He has rights as a biological parent," said Ms Curtis.
"But he's never been around."
"The courts don't see it that way, unfortunately."
"The courts suck arse," said Louis, and Ms Curtis didn't even berate him for
language, but simply agreed.
***** Chapter 4 *****
The days continued as usual, with school, trips to the mall, and trips to the
skatepark all featuring heavily on the roster. One day after school Niall, Zayn
and Liam, Harry's schoolfriends Tom and Callum and Jamie, Jason and the
football gang, and Louis' skateboard friends all turned up at the mall at once.
A boisterious group of nearly twenty boys made their way around the mall,
several with skateboards. They went into clothes shops, sports shops and
department stores, blocking the aisles wherever they went. Harry found a
keychain with a minature skateboard on it in one of the gift shops and bought
it for Louis while Louis was exploring the rest of the store. He'd give it to
him for Christmas. Louis had his key on a standard keyring right now which he
kept in his right trouser pocket. Louis didn't like things around his neck the
way Harry did.
The security guard who didn't like them was unfortunately on duty. They
enountered him whilst they were walking through the mall and he warned them
against blocking other shoppers.
"You can't walk around with twenty of you in a gang. Gangs aren't allowed in
the mall," he said.
"We're not a gang, we're just friends," Louis told him.
"You're a gathering, therefore a gang. Break it up, or I'll be forced to call
backup."
They didn't listen to him. They were having too much fun. Inevitably, they made
their way to the food court. Everyone split up to buy food, before reconvening
back at a group of empty tables. A large group of St Joseph's students, their
rival school, was also there, dressed in their ties and formal blazers and
polished shoes. The St Joseph's guys began catcalling to them, calling out the
hole in Jason's trousers, the too-small jacket Louis was wearing.
"They're just wankers," said Jason to Louis. "Ignore them."
Louis managed to, until they started picking on Harry, calling him 'girly-
hair'. Louis wouldn't stand for anyone picking on Harry. He stood up and
presented himself to the chief name-caller, a boy called Clinton. Clinton had
beaten Louis by one position in an athletics carnival before, and thought he
was superior.
"Take that back," said Louis.
"Oh, if it isn't Louis Tomlinson," said Clinton, as his friends laughed. "Still
failing on the athletics track?"
"I prefer football."
"I bet I'd beat you at that, too."
"Take back what you said about Harry."
"About who?" laughed Clinton.
"About my brother, who you called girly-hair."
"You said it yourself, he's got girly hair. Now, I can't take back something
you agree with, can I?"
"Take it back, or you'll regret it," said Louis.
"What are you going to do, Tomlinson? Beat me up, like the primate you are?"
"Take it back," said Louis fiercely.
"No. He's got girly hair."
Harry had stood up by this stage. "Please don't fight," he said to Louis.
But several others of their group were backing Louis up. All of his
skateboarding friends had stood up, swishing their boards menacingly. They
wouldn't allow an insult to the brotherhood.
"Harry, sit down," said Louis.
Harry spoke to Clinton. "Call me girly-hair all you want. I don't care. I've
got more friends than you."
"Is that a challenge, girly-hair?"
"No, it's a fact," said Harry honestly. Clinton and his friends, about a dozen
of them, were definitely outclassed for sheer numbers compared to Harry's lot.
"You want to start a brawl?" said Jason, standing close to Clinton.
All of a sudden, Clinton looked nervous. "Yeah, because that's the only way you
primates can settle things, right?" he said, laughing uneasily.
"You insulted one of our brothers," said Jason. "Take it back."
"All right. Girly-hair doesn't have girly-hair."
"That's not taking it back."
"I can't tell a lie."
Both Jason and Louis got in his face. "Take it back!" they both said.
Clinton's friends tried to pull them away, but Louis and Jason weren't budging.
In the meantime, several other boys, including Zayn and Niall, had stood up.
"I don't have a fight with you," said Louis, shaking off the boy trying to grab
him. "Stay out of it."
"He's our leader," said the boy.
"Maybe you should follow somebody else."
Jason was in Clinton's face. "At least Harry's not a girly-boy, afraid to
fight."
"I'm outnumbered," admitted Clinton.
"Just you and me," said Jason.
"No, just you and me," corrected Louis.
"You've probably got a knife or something."
"I don't have a knife. Come on, Clinton. Put your words into action."
"Fighting doesn't prove anything," said Clinton. "So what if you can beat me?
I'll admit you can beat me. I'm not fighting you. If you can't handle a few
words, that's your problem."
"Louis, please just let it go," begged Harry. "That security guard's back."
That only seemed to make Louis more angry. He grabbed Clinton across the table
by his collars. Clinton was forced to stand up. "My brother does not have girly
hair. He has curly hair. I think you're mistaken."
But Clinton was foolish, rather than sensible. "It's girly, to me," he said,
and gasped, as Louis pulled him over the table, scattering the leftovers from
his burger and chips.
All of a sudden the two groups were pushing against each other. No one was
actively fighting yet. Even Louis was only shaking Clinton.
"Don't fight," said Harry.
Just then, the security guard came up. He'd obviously been keeping an eye on
them. "Leave off," he shouted. "Don't you dare fight in here. You'll be banned
for life."
Louis let Clinton go, and he landed back on his side of the table. Just as
quickly, though, Clinton surged forward, a fist aimed at Louis' face. Louis
ducked. "You want a fight?' said Louis. "I'll give you a fight." He grabbed for
Clinton again, but Clinton darted away. Jason, however, grabbed him.
"I've got him for you," said Jason to Louis. "Come around the table."
Meanwhile boys from St Joseph's were pushing against Harry's friends. If the
tables and chairs hadn't been bolted down, someone would have thrown one by
now.
"Take it back, Clinton!" shouted Louis, coming around the table, fists
clenched. Harry followed him, begging him not to fight.
"I don't care what he says," said Harry pleadingly to Louis. "He's not worth
it."
Clinton was being held, arms to his side, by an enraged Jason. He shook in
Jason's grip, looking frightened. "This isn't fair."
"Let him go, Jason. I'll deal with him," said Louis.
Jason left off, and immediately began fighting a boy who'd been banging on him
whilst he was holding Clinton.
"Square up," Louis told Clinton, even though Louis was smaller.
"I take it back!" yelled Clinton, his face pinched with fear.
Louis dropped his fists. "Apologise."
Just then, a group of security guards descended upon the two fighting groups,
trying to break them up. Some still went at it more enthusiastically than
others, however. Their skateboarding friends were particularly eager for a
brawl, shoving and insulting the St Joseph's boys.
"I'm sorry," said Clinton to Harry.
"He doesn't have girly hair?" said Louis.
"No."
"That's enough, Louis," said Harry.
Louis left off Clinton. Just then, he was grabbed by a security guard. "Get
back!" shouted the security guard, hauling Louis bodily away and flinging him
towards the outer reaches of the food court. Louis stumbled, but remained on
his feet. Then Harry felt himself grabbed, and bodily forced out of the area.
Louis didn't like that. He ran up to Harry's security guard and yelled, "Leave
him alone!"
"Stay back!" said the security guard, releasing Harry in the direction of
Louis.
The fight was breaking up. Several boys from either side had run out of the
way, to the far side of the food court, Clinton included. As far as Harry could
see, no blood had been shed; it had only been boys pushing at each other. He
was glad. He didn't want to fight. If only Louis wasn't so protective of him.
He felt pride and dismay in equal measure; pride that Louis would stand up for
him over anything, and dismay that it had led to this.
A whole bunch more of their friends, including Jason, Darren, and Leo, had been
pushed back to the outskirts where Louis and Harry were.
"Get out of this mall!" shouted the security guard dragging Jason. "Get out,
and don't come back again! I'll recognise you."
"I hope you're saying the same to the St Joseph's lads," said Jason.
"Both of you lot! You're not welcome here. Next time we'll call the police.
Come on!" He began dragging Jason away, and the other boys followed, telling
him to leave Jason alone.
"Are you going to leave the mall?" asked the security guard.
"Yeah, we'll leave your stupid mall," said Louis.
The guard finally let go of Jason. "And don't come back. The police will be
called, if you do."
"Like the police can stop people from walking around a mall," said Darren, as
the security guard left them.
"You want to risk it?" said Jason.
"We're still gonna hang out and skateboard. The security guards don't pay
attention to us, anyway. They hang out in the mall, not around the carparks."
"I don't know what I'm supposed to do if I can't hang around the mall," said
Jason. Several other boys voiced their agreement.
"I reckon as long as we don't come back as a gang, they won't care," said
Darren. "They'll forget us quickly. They must see hundreds of people a day.
Give 'em a week."
"We showed those St Joseph's boys, anyway," said Leo. "They won't be looking to
fight us again in a hurry."
"St Joseph's boys are wankers," agreed Darren. They were out of the mall by
this stage, released into the carpark areas. "Who's coming skateboarding at the
park?"
Niall and Liam begged off, as did Harry's schoolfriends, and Jason and his
friends. Surprisingly, Zayn said yes. The others went their separate ways and
the skateboarders, including Louis and Harry and Zayn, went to the park.
"I've wanted to learn to skateboard for a while," Zayn told Harry.
"You can practise on my board. Come on. Let's go to the main area, where it's
easier."
"Yeah. I'm not ready to start on ramps just yet."
Zayn picked it up quickly, quicker than Harry had. He was able to do 180s on
the board by the time Harry decided he wanted to use his board. They walked up
the grassy embankment above the ramp to where Cameron and Leo and Graham and
Hugh were hanging out. They were keeping an eagle eye on the action. As they
arrived, Louis came up from the ramp, along with Darren. Darren flung himself
down on the grass, and Louis sat beside Harry on his board.
"How are things going with Emily?" Darren asked.
"All right."
"Remember, you have to tell us the details," said Cameron.
"There's not that much to tell."
"I know you've been going over to her house while her parents aren't home,
don't tell me you've been doing nothing."
Louis blushed a little. "It's private."
"We're the brotherhood. You have to tell us. We've got a deal."
"When one of you guys makes it with a girl, then it'll be fair. Until then..."
"I've made out with a girl," said Leo.
"You're kidding," said Darren. "Who? When?"
"Cynthia. Two days ago, outside the toilet blocks. I touched her boob."
"You're not dating her."
"Not yet. But I'm gonna ask her."
"Leo, my man," said Darren, patting him on the back. "All right, Louis, it's
your turn now."
"My turn for what?"
"To tell us how far you've gone."
"We've touched each other," said Louis reluctantly.
"Has she jerked you off? Did you cum?"
"Yeah."
"Woah. Tell us all the details," said Darren, as the other guys leaned forward
interestedly.
"No big deal. She just jerked me off. It was good, once I put my hand down and
helped her."
Harry instantly felt jealous. Some girl had made Louis orgasm?
"Did you touch her?" said Darren.
"Yeah. On her pussy. But I didn't know what I was doing any more than she knew
what to do with me. She had to guide me. There was lots of stickiness."
"Stickiness?" said Leo.
"Girls get wet," explained Louis. "Like precum, but more."
"Wow," said Leo.
"You're such a kid," said Darren to Leo. "Louis, you got her off?"
"She said so. I dunno. It's not like with us, when you can tell, because of the
cum. You have to trust her."
"She's still dating you, right? She must have got off. Why would a girl date a
guy who couldn't bring her off?"
"Yeah, I guess so," said Louis.
Harry wanted to block his ears. He didn't want to hear about Loius with some
girl. At the same time he was aroused, at the thought of Louis orgasming. He
had to keep listening.
"You're in, man," said Darren.
"I guess so."
"When are you going to have sex with her again?"
"None of your business."
"Are you going to do intercourse?"
"I don't know. That seems like a big step. I don't know if she's ready for it,
either."
"I'm glad Melody hasn't made me do that," said Harry.
"Oh, Harry." Louis draped an arm around his shoulder. "I'm two years older than
you. You've got plenty of time. You're only twelve."
Not if the way Melody was putting pressure on him was any indication. She'd not
only made him touch her breasts, she'd insisted upon running her hand over his
crotch. He'd been semi-aroused, but anything aroused him these days. It wasn't
specific to Melody. She'd exclaimed at his hardness, and Harry knew it was only
a matter of time before Melody wanted to have sex with him. He simply didn't
know what to do.
"Nearly thirteen," said Harry, feeling that he didn't have plenty of time, at
all.
"Wanna come down and skateboard?"
"I think Zayn wants to," said Harry.
Zayn protested, but Harry insisted. He took Zayn down to the middle of the
ramp, where he could start off without too much pressure.
"Just keep pulling 180s as you get momentum," said Harry.
Zayn followed his intructions, and was soon peaking out on the small ramp. He
was a natural at pulling 180s forward so that he could swing back up the other
side. Harry was slightly jealous. He'd taken so much longer to get used to
skateboarding. Then again, he knew Zayn had practised before, on Louis' and
Harry's boards. Zayn wasn't a complete novice.
Zayn eventually pulled off the ramp, handing Harry's helmet and skateboard to
him. "That was wild," he said.
"You looked really good," said Harry, happy enough to be magnanimous.
"Thanks, mate. Have your turn now?"
Harry needed no second invitation. He propped his board on the lip of the ramp,
as he'd seen Louis do countless times, and dropped down when there was a way
clear. He was so much more confident on the ramp, now, ever since the
competition. He pulled backwards turns with ease. He'd even begun to land on a
somewhat regular basis 540 degree turns. Only when he was confident, though.
Fortunately, they all came off when he did them. He'd hate to stack it.
Eventually, the boys began standing up, and Harry knew it was time for them to
go. He leapt up onto the ramp on the side of the embankment, and caught his
board, before making his way over.
"See you tomorrow, Lou," said Darren, and the other boys echoed similar
sentiments.
Zayn went home with him and Louis, so they couldn't skateboard, but rather
walked. Zayn dominated the conversation, saying he was going to buy a
skateboard.
"Do you have enough money?" asked Harry. "They're not cheap."
"I've been saving my money for a while. For no real reason. I might as well
spend it on a skateboard."
"We'll go with you to Mick's on the weekend, if you're keen," said Louis.
"Mick's. That's your favourite skateboard place, isn't it?"
"Yeah. They've got a whole range. They'll have something for you. Now we just
have to get Niall and Liam into skateboarding."
"Niall calls skateboards demon-things," said Harry.
"I know. He's funny," said Louis. "And Liam's too scared about cracking his
skull open. We'll never make skateboarders out of them."
"Liam doesn't make sense to me," said Zayn. "You know how he's all keen on
boxing right now? You get your head hurt far oftener in that."
"He thinks he's got more control when it comes to boxing. And he believes in
referees."
"Liam's so gullible, he'd probably believe in fairies if you told him they were
real."
"I'm telling him that," said Harry.
"Go ahead," said Zayn. "Tell him you believe in fairies, and see what he says.
The correct answer being, of course there are fairies. They hang out in gay
clubs."
Harry felt his stomach drop. Zayn wasn't homophobic, was he? "I'm friends with
Keaton Black," he burst out, it being the only thing he could think of to say
that wouldn't give him away completely. Keaton always said hi to him and waved
when they saw each other.
Zayn looked at him, surprised. "It wasn't a slur, Harry. It was just a joke."
"It wasn't funny."
Harry glanced at Louis, to see what he was thinking, but Louis was already
talking. "It might seem funny to you, Zayn, but people can get hurt by stuff
like that."
"All right." Zayn held his hands up for peace. "I'm sorry. I won't say stuff
like that."
"You're not homophobic, are you?" said Louis.
Zayn paused. "You know, I've never really thought much about it? I don't feel
like I'm homophobic. I've got nothing against gay people."
"Good."
Harry was glad Zayn didn't press Louis further. He just wanted the subject
dropped. Louis was protecting him again, although Zayn didn't know it. Harry
wasn't ready to come out to anyone except Louis, and he didn't want to be
forced into explaining so that Zayn would know why Louis was being so
insistent.
***
Christmas passed. Louis turned fifteen. He was enraptured with Harry's
Christmas gift. Louis was a fidgeter by nature, and he was always pulling the
skateboard off the keyring and doing finger-tricks with it. He was doing them
now, whilst talking with Harry and the boys about how the court case was going.
Tomlinson versus Austin had started. Because Louis was at school, Ms Curtis was
his representative, although Louis himself would have to appear before the
court soon.
"Are you scared?" asked Niall.
They were all sitting together on the front steps.
"Yeah," admitted Louis. "They could take me away from you guys."
"But Mum is the best mum there is. Surely that has to count for something?"
"Ms Curtis told me there was something they were using against her. Apparently
in the past she had a boyfriend who beat one of her foster kids."
"That must have been before us," said Liam, "because I don't remember any such
thing."
"It was years ago. She split up with him straight away, she told me," said
Louis. "That's why she's never had a boyfriend since, because she puts her kids
first. She doesn't want any of us to ever be hurt. But my father's using it
against her. His lawyers have access to all of her records."
"That's totally unfair. If she split up with him straight away, she can't be
responsible for it," said Zayn. "Some people are just bastards."
"My dad or the boyfriend?" said Louis, sounding as if he thought Zayn should
mean both.
Zayn obliged him. "Both of them."
"Aren't court cases expensive?" asked Niall suddenly. "How can you afford the
lawyers?"
"I've got Legal Aid on my side," explained Louis. "Ms Curtis contacted them,
and they took us on."
"Thank god for Legal Aid. Do you get your say in front of the court?"
"I'm being called up, yeah, by my lawyers. I'm just going to keep repeating
that I don't want to live with my dad, that I want to stay with Ms Curtis."
"If they're at all fair," said Liam, "they should listen to you."
"Here's hoping so," said Louis.
They discussed the case for a little while longer, until Ms Curtis pulled up in
the driveway. Louis jumped up immediately and ran to the driver's side. Harry
could see him having an animated conversation with Ms Curtis. She hugged him
and they came around to the house.
"You're home early," said Liam. Normally the court didn't let out until four.
Ms Curtis looked at Louis. He shrugged back. "You can tell them."
Ms Curtis explained, "Louis' father was the next called to give evidence. They
decided, since he'd take a while on the stand, that they'd break a little
earlier than normal."
"Good, so it's not bad news," said Liam.
"Not yet," said Louis.
"Keep your chin up, honey," said Ms Curtis. "We still have to present our case,
yet."
"Can I come, tomorrow?"
"You know you've got school. What kind of responsible parent would I look,
letting you skip school to come to a court case?"
"I suppose," muttered Louis.
"Have any of you had anything to eat?" asked Ms Curtis.
"No, we haven't gone into the house yet," said Zayn.
"How about grilled ham and cheese sandwiches?" It was her staple comfort food.
They all said yes.
***
The next day after school, Louis and Harry went to the skate park. Zayn joined
them. He had his skateboard now, which Harry and Louis helped him buy. And he
was a natural on it. Harry would have felt jealous, if he didn't love Zayn so
much. Louis wouldn't dump him for Zayn, he was sure. And now there were seven
of them hanging out at the mall before school. The security guards never
bothered them in the carpark; they left them to their own devices.
Louis wanted to go to the skatepark most particularly, because today was the
day of his father's testimony, and he was feeling anxious. He needed something
to take his mind off things. The other skateboarding boys went with him. They
were well-known in the skatepark and no one bothered them. Except; Adam had
started hanging around the park. Louis' old friend from primary school. And he
wasn't a savoury influence.
"He deals drugs," Darren told Harry.
"What kind of drugs?"
"Pot, and amphetamines. Sometimes E's, or LSD. Whatever he gets his hands on."
Harry looked over to where Louis was talking to him. "Louis' not doing drugs,
is he?"
"No, not from what I know. But apparently he used to be friends with Adam?"
"Yeah," said Harry. "Back in primary school."
"Louis' feeling a little lost right now. Perhaps that's why he's friends with
Adam again."
Adam had his binoculars around his neck. Harry remembered those binoculars from
primary school. As Harry watched, Adam let Louis borrow them. Louis pointed
them towards the skate ramp, and began exclaiming. Harry looked away. He didn't
want to see Louis exclaiming over anything of Adam's.
"Do you want to go on the ramp?" he said instead to Darren.
"Yeah, all right."
They both stood up, leaving behind Leo and Mark, and walked towards the ramp.
Harry was aware of Louis pointing Adam's binoculars in his direction. He tried
to do his very best, even pulling a reverse 540 without mishap. Whenever Harry
looked up, Louis had the binoculars pointed in his direction. That wasn't to
say he was looking at Harry, particularly, but Harry still felt gratified. At
least his attention was off Adam.
That night, at around 1:30am, Harry crawled into Louis' bed. Louis woke up as
Harry kissed his face.
"Wha-, Harry? You need me to check the house?" he said through the thickness of
sleep.
"No, I'm not scared tonight," said Harry. Often, these days, he wasn't scared
at night. It was still habit, however, for him to wake up in the small hours of
the morning and not be able to get back to sleep. Sleeping with Louis was
always the solution. Louis still occasionally chided him about sleeping
together, but it was never whole-hearted, and Harry ignored him.
Louis rolled over, so that he was on his back. Harry snuggled in beside him,
putting his head on the pillow.
"What did Ms Curtis say happened in the court case today?" he asked.
"It was about my dad. Just how my dad told them how he'd turned his life
around, how he wanted the family together, how he was decorating a bedroom for
me, and stuff. He was on the stand for most of the day, apparently. Then his
wife took the stand, to have her say. But now it's my turn."
"Is your dad paying for his side?"
"So far as I know, yes. I don't know what he's up to. Why's he spending a
bundle of money on me? I'm happy enough. Why can't he leave me alone?"
Harry reached up an arm to stroke Louis' shoulder. "I hope he loses."
"So do I."
They were silent for a time, Harry stroking Louis, Louis petting Harry
occasionally on the back, when Harry spoke up again. "I saw you with Adam
today."
"So what?"
"Darren says he's a drug dealer."
"Maybe he is," said Louis. "I'm not buying."
"So why were you talking to him?"
"I wanted to use his binoculars. You've improved out of sight, Harry. I was
watching you."
Harry felt like preening. He said, "I'm still pretty rubbish."
"You're not. You got seventh in that skateboarding competition, you've really
improved. You pulled a backwards 540 today, I saw you."
"Yeah, well... Zayn's catching up to me."
"Zayn's a natural, I'll agree, but you've worked so hard. I'm proud of you."
Louis hugged him. Their thighs met. Harry automatically checked for a Louis
hard-on. He didn't have one, but Harry had a semi. Louis said nothing, as
Harry's hard-on pressed into his thigh.
"You're right," said Harry, "I've worked really hard."
"I'm so proud of you, baby," Louis repeated, hugging him tightly, not bothered
by his hard-on. Louis would be used to them by now. Harry got them often enough
in bed with Louis. "Do you know, I've found out about a skate park that has a
vertical ramp. It's not as big as the one we had the competition on, but it's
better than the kiddy ramp down at the skatepark. It's in Sheffield. You
interested?"
"Yes."
"One of the boys coming to our skatepark used to live around there. I'm going
to tell the other lads in the morning."
"Cool," said Harry, remembering the buzz he'd felt on his first vertical ramp,
during the skateboard competition.
"We'd only be able to go there on weekends, though. The travelling will eat up
the time we have on school days."
Harry bumped his face into Louis' neck. He smelled so good. He breathed in,
deeply. "We'll just go on weekends, then."
"It's not fair the Council won't build a decent ramp at our skatepark. They're
too worried about liability, if anyone gets injured. That's what Darren says."
"The Council sucks," agreed Harry, his lips on Louis' neck. He didn't kiss,
precisely, he just murmured his lips over Louis' neck, his body pressed into
Louis'.
***
It was Louis' turn to take the stand. He couldn't eat breakfast. Ms Curtis made
him drink orange juice and packed an apple and some meusli bars along with the
sandwiches they'd have for lunch.
Louis was wearing a tie over his white button-up school shirt and underneath
his school jumper. He only owned one pair of shoes--his Converse--but he still
looked very grown up to Harry. At fifteen, his nose had begun growing, his baby
fat dropping off, his voice deepening. Harry still hadn't started growing yet.
Louis had assured him that boys who start growing later end up taller but Harry
wasn't convinced. Even Niall was shooting up.
Court didn't start until later than school, so Louis had time to kill. He came
out to watch cartoons with the others, something he rarely did.
"Do you have to go to school after you give testimony?" asked Liam.
"It's Ms Curtis, what do you think? I don't expect to be on the stand all day,
or anything."
"Will you be back by lunch, so we can ask you how things went?" said Niall.
"I don't know. Ms Curtis is packing lunch for me. You'll probably have to wait
until after school."
"Well, I wish you all the luck in the world."
"Me, too," said Liam.
"Go get 'em," said Zayn.
Harry had already wished Louis good luck that morning so he said, "You'll do
great."
"Thanks, lads," said Louis.
"You look very nice in your tie," said Zayn.
"Oh, shut up."
Soon it was time for Harry and the others to leave for school. Ms Curtis came
into the room and called them. She was driving them because it was snowing.
"You want the TV left on?" said Liam to Louis.
"Yeah, leave it on," said Louis. "Give me the remote." He switched the channel
to a music station. "For once I get to watch what I want to watch."
"Sorry if we aren't as trendy as you."
"You'll grow up," said Louis.
"Good luck," Liam said again.
"Get out of here."
At break, Harry met up with the boys again. They were all sitting with their
girlfriends. They were quite popular, now, having girlfriends amongst the group
of popular girls. The most popular boy in Year Eight, William, came up with his
friends and asked Harry if he wanted to play football.
"All of you lads are welcome," he added.
Harry and the boys all looked at one another.
"Maybe lunchtime," said Harry. The other boys nodded.
"Cool. So you'll come at lunchtime? I'll organise a game for then."
"It's been snowing all morning," said Niall.
"There's no more forecast for today. I'll see you at lunch," he said, leaving
with his friends.
The boys all had their mind on Louis' court case. "How do you think it's going,
really, Harry?" said Liam.
Harry basked in pride, being the one Louis confided in. "I don't know," he
admitted. "So far Louis' lawyers haven't presented much of their case. And
they've still got the psychologist to testify."
"Why isn't the psychologist testifying on behalf of the father?"
"The psychologist is a neutral. It's not like other court cases where you have
the prosecution and the defence. The psychologist speaks for the court."
"So he should be on Louis' side, then," said Zayn.
"I don't know," said Harry. "I don't know how it all works."
"I can't believe we could lose him."
"Don't think that way," said Niall. "Think positively. What claim does his
father have? I don't think being a biological parent should be enough."
"When your parents don't want you, they shouldn't ever have you," said Liam,
who had experience of being unwanted by his parents.
"I agree," said Zayn. "Doesn't anyone ever think of us?"
"Louis says it's all about parental rights," said Harry. "They pretend to care
about the rights of the child, there's a whole lot of criteria they have to go
through, but Louis' lawyers have told him children end up with bad parents all
the time."
"And anyway, his dad hasn't ever proven to be a bad parent, just an absent
one," said Niall.
"It should count," said Zayn.
"I simply can't believe the courts would give his dad custody," said Liam. "Not
when Mum has been so good to us. Not when Louis testifies about that fact. The
psychologist, too, he must see how well-adjusted Louis has become since he's
been with Mum. He'd been shuffled around before, he told us; now he's stayed
steady for years."
"Do you remember what he said to us when he first came?" said Niall. "'Don't
bother getting to know me, I won't be here for long'. He had such a chip on his
shoulder, as Mum would say."
"He had a lot of pain. He didn't think anyone could ever love him."
"We proved him wrong," said Zayn. "He's one of us, now. He can't leave."
"There must be something that we can do," said Liam. "Can't we testify?"
"If the lawyers wanted us to, they'd have asked us," said Niall.
"Maybe they haven't thought about it," said Liam. "Maybe we should offer. I'm
going to contact his lawyers and ask them. Louis knows their phone number. He's
got their card."
"Do that. If they're willing to hear you, I'd like to join in."
"Me, too," said Zayn. "Harry?"
"Of course."
"Tell those lawyers it's the four of us, wanting to testify. It's not fair that
our opinions should be disregarded. Not when we're like brothers."
Harry felt a bit more settled. Liam's idea was a good one. Surely if they all
testified about how much they loved Louis, the judge would be swayed?
***** Chapter 5 *****
Louis must have been dropped back at school some time in the afternoon, because
he came home down the street like usual, kicking up snow. Harry was waiting for
him on the front steps, sitting on his skateboard since dry bits were hard to
find at this time of year. "Louis is here!" he called into the house, and the
boys rushed up to see him, coming outside.
"So Mum took you back to school," said Liam, when Louis was close enough to
talk to. He'd taken the tie off but still looked so grown up, thought Harry.
"Yeah, after lunch," said Louis. He reached the bottom of the steps, and began
to climb up.
"How did it go?" asked Zayn.
Louis dropped his bag into the snow, and leaned against a pillar on the step
below Harry. "I don't know. It was so hard to know what the judge was
thinking."
"You got examined, and cross-examined, right?" said Liam, who watched the odd
crime drama.
"Yeah. My lawyers were cool. My dad's lawyers weren't. They kept asking all
sorts of stupid questions, about if Ms Curtis had ever been violent, if we had
enough clothes and things; stupid stuff."
"But Mum has never been violent," said Liam. "And the records would show that."
"They just want to put the idea in the judge's mind, the lawyer says. The judge
has already had the tesimony about Ms Curtis' violent boyfriend from the past,
and they even brought up the stuff about Coach Morrison to make Ms Curtis look
bad. My father's lawyers are trying to make an association, says my lawyer."
"Your father's lawyers are scum of the earth," said Niall.
"I told the court I wanted to look after Harry. The judge didn't even know who
Harry was. The judge doesn't know any of you guys."
"We're planning to rectify that," said Liam. "I'm going to call up your
lawyers, see if they'll let us testify."
"Would you?' said Louis.
"It seems the obvious solution. That way we can get across how well you're
doing with Mum's care, and how well Mum is doing to look after you."
"I don't know if they'll listen," said Louis. "They're worried about the trial
deadline, which is close. If it goes over allocated time, they have to make
extra dates, and it could be months before we get a decision."
"That's another few months you'll get with us," Liam pointed out.
"I hate this. I hate the not knowing."
"I'm sure our testimony will help you."
"Yeah, yeah," said Louis. "Do it, then."
"Give me your lawyers' card," said Liam, and Louis fished in his back trouser
pocket and handed it over. "I'm going to call them now," he said, standing up.
"I'll be as persuasive as possible."
"Good luck, Liam," said Louis.
Liam gave him the thumbs-up gesture and went inside.
"How can the judge make the correct decision if he doesn't even know any of you
guys?" said Louis.
"We'll testify," said Niall. "You can bet on that."
Liam eventually came back out. "I managed to convince your lawyers to call me
to the stand," he told Louis. "Not the rest, I'm afraid. I'll be everyone's
representative."
Immediately, Liam was swamped with comments as to what he should say from all
the boys, including Harry. That Louis had stabilised under Ms Curtis'
influence, that Louis was the best big brother, that Louis helped them out with
their homework whenever they asked. That they couldn't function properly
without Louis. That he was integral to their family.
"I'll remember everything," promised Liam.
Harry got up and wrapped his arms around him. "Speak for all of us, Liam."
"I will," said Liam, determinedly.
***
Liam was called to the stand two days later. Everyone was especially anxious,
because this was the last date the trial had been set down for. Any over-run
would mean another couple of months before the case was concluded. Harry's
birthday was very soon, but he didn't think about it much. There were far more
important things to think about.
It was Liam who got to stay home this morning. He watched cartoons with little
enthusiasm. "Maybe we could switch to music TV," he said.
"Yes!" said Louis, who was also watching cartoons with a lack of interest.
"But I want to watch the big monster destroy downtown," said Zayn.
"Music TV, who votes?" said Louis.
Louis and Liam put their hands up. Harry joined them quickly. He liked music TV
better than cartoons.
"All right!" said Louis. "Majority wins."
"But we always get to watch cartoons in the morning," protested Niall.
"Not this morning. Come on, Niall. Broaden your cultural horizons." Louis
changed the channel and stood up and began bopping to Rhianna. Harry joined
him. They both did a very bad dance to the song on the TV. Britney Spears came
on next, and they continued to bop.
"This song's rubbish," protested Niall.
"It's rubbish, but you can dance to it," responded Louis. "Come on, Nialler.
Let's see your moves."
"There's nothing wrong with my moves," declared Niall, and got up to bop along.
"Oh, why don't we?" said Liam to Zayn, and they all got up. Ms Curtis was very
surprised to come out of the kitchen, lunchboxes packed, and see all of the
boys up dancing, bumping against each other.
"It's time to go to school," she said. "Your lunchboxes are on the kitchen
counter."
"Thanks!" chorused the boys, all except for Liam, who was going to court. Liam
had on Louis' tie.
They all collected lunchboxes, packed them into backpacks, and made their way
to school. The snow cover meant that there was no skateboarding, so Niall,
Louis, Harry, and Zayn all walked together.
"How do you think Liam will go?" asked Niall.
"He'll do the best he can," said Zayn. "I trust him."
"I trust him, too," said Harry.
Louis said nothing.
"Louis, what do you reckon?" said Zayn.
"My dad's lawyers are tricky," said Louis, "They could have him saying
anything. I don't know if Liam can stand up to them."
"He'll do it," said Zayn. "For you. For us."
***
Liam hadn't returned to school by lunchtime, so Harry forced once again to wait
until after school to get the news. The others had classes with him, but Harry,
being in the year below, obviously didn't. He wanted to catch him straight
after school but the teacher in their last class made them stay back to lecture
them on the perils of not doing homework, so the other boys had already left by
the time Harry got out. Harry ran as much as he could in the snow to get home
by the time the others did. Two blocks from home, he saw Louis walking, and
shouted at him to stop.
"What's up?" said Louis, when he drew level.
"I just didn't want Liam to have to repeat everything," said Harry.
"Silly monkey. You had me worried for a minute."
They continued on together. Louis was obviously not in the mood for
conversation. Harry asked him if he'd heard anything from Liam, Louis said no,
and that was it. Normally Louis would have something to chat about, but not
this time. Harry could see the tension in his clenched jaw.
They arrived at the house and shucked their snow-covered shoes off. "Liam!"
called Louis.
Liam came up, along with Zayn and Niall.
"You want to know about how it went," said Liam.
"Obviously."
"Come and sit on the couch, and I'll tell you."
Niall, Liam and Zayn sat on the good couch, and Louis and Harry sat on the
adjacent couch.
"I suppose you lot already know," said Louis to Niall and Zayn.
"He didn't tell us everything," said Zayn. "He wanted to save it for you."
"Thanks, Liam."
"I figured it was only fair," said Liam. "Right. Well, I got to court an hour
early to meet with the lawyers so they could check out what I'd be answering to
their questions. It was all very last minute so they had lots of questions for
me. Then it was time to go in. Your lawyers started first. They asked me about
what it was like, living with Mum; did I find it overcrowded? I said it was
great, that we were all like brothers, and that I never felt like it was
overcrowded."
"At least until three people decide they want to use the toilet at once," said
Zayn archly.
"That wasn't necessary to mention," said Liam sternly. He turned back to Louis.
"He was talking on an interactive, day-to-day basis. Actually, I think he was
asking it because he knew your father's lawyers would ask about overcrowding."
"Yeah, they've made an issue of that throughout the trial," said Louis.
"Well, I let them know that I personally didn't feel it was overcrowded, that
we were all really close, that we rarely argued. Which is all true. I didn't
speak anything but the truth."
"Of course you didn't, Liam."
"I was worried about doing it," said Liam, "testifying to a court, and it was
scary with all those people there looking at me; what else could I do but tell
the truth? Nothing else came to my mind. Anyway, next I was asked a few more
questions about living here, what it was like, how we were fed, how we were
looked after, then he got onto you, Louis. He asked what you were like when you
first came to the home. I said you were sullen, moody, disruptive, difficult to
get along with. That you had a massive chip on your shoulder. I'm sorry, I hope
that was right."
Harry remembered the Louis of those earlier days, the Louis that had entered
the house only three months before he did. That Louis had gone skateboarding
without permission, had gotten drunk at Christmas, had gotten numerous
detentions for various classroom infractions.
"You did good, Liam," said Louis. "That's exactly the impression we want to get
across, that I was this disruptive kid, and then I became, well, domesticated."
"I hoped so because next he asked what you were like today, and I really piled
it on about how happy you were, how you wanted to stay with Mum and didn't want
to leave, how you were the best big brother, always looking out for us. How
much we needed you, to complete us. He asked if I was closest to you, and I
said no, that Harry, our youngest, was closest. I said in particular that Harry
would be lost without you. I'm sorry, Harry, but I told about some of your
past, how you had abusive foster parents, how you got nightmares when you came
and how Louis helped you. I hope you don't mind."
"It's exactly what I would have said," said Harry. "Louis helped me and I don't
care who knows."
Liam said, "Then he asked, did your father ever visit the entire time you've
been living with Mum? I said no."
"Good. They drummed it in," said Louis.
"But then came the cross-examination," said Liam. "Your father's lawyers got
really stuck into me. First they harped on about the crowdedness of the house.
I replied that I'd already anwered it wasn't overcrowded-"
"Good for you."
"-yeah, but then he was going, 'You're thirteen years old, you're old enough to
warrant a room of your own', I just had to keep saying I was happy sharing. He
made me sound like a robot. Then he asked me, did we ever go out as a family,
and I said, not except to free events, because we couldn't afford it; and he
was like, 'Don't you feel like you're missing out?' and I was like, no, we have
plenty of fun, we go to the markets sometimes on the weekend, or the pool, or
just down to the river for a picnic. Honestly, it's like this guy thinks fun
has a price tag. Then he was like, 'so, you're latchkey kids' because we've got
our own keys to get in and out, and honestly, I just couldn't believe this guy.
I'm thirteen, I can take care of myself after school; Mum always gets a
babysitter at night. He seems to think all teenagers should be babysat until
they're like nineteen or something. I'm glad I'm not his kid."
"It's normal for people our age to get their own keys," said Harry. "Melody's
parents don't get back until 6:00pm; she has her own key."
"So does Emily," said Louis. "Honestly, my father's lawyers are, what's the
word... reactionary!"
"What does that mean?" said the others, so Louis had to explain that
reactionaries opposed change, that he learned about it in Social Studies.
"Anything else, Liam?" asked Louis.
"I was on the stand for quite a while, but there was nothing that stands out
much. Just plenty of questions from your father's side implying that Mum was
incompetent to look after five of us, which I think I answered pretty well."
Louis got up and hugged Liam awkwardly on the couch. "Thanks, Li. You did a
great job."
"It was the least I could do," said Liam. "I really do think of you as my
brother, you know."
"As do I, all of you," said Zayn.
They all responded with similar sentiments, driving the sappy meter up quite a
bit, until Zayn turned on the TV. "Afternoon cartoons!" he crowed.
"I'm starving," said Niall. "We haven't had anything to eat yet, waiting for
you lads to get home."
"Let's go raid the kitchen, then," said Louis, and all of them except for Zayn,
who was rapt in his cartoons, went into the kitchen to get something to eat.
Niall grabbed cheese and biscuits, a banana, and an oatmeal biscuit; Harry a
banana and an oatmeal biscuit, Louis a sandwich, and Liam an apple, and an
oatmeal biscuit.
"You're not having an oatmeal biscuit?" Harry asked Louis. They were homemade,
and delicious.
"Later," said Louis. "I want my sandwich first."
"What kind of sandwich are you making?" Harry asked with interest, as Louis got
a whole heap of stuff out of the fridge.
"A super-special everything sandwich. Niall, leave the cheese out."
"Sure, bro," said Niall, as Louis went to the fridge for more.
Harry listed the ingredients Louis had assembled. "Ham, tomato, mayonnaise,
chutney--what are you getting now? Pineapple and broccoli? That's gross."
Louis put all his ingredients down. "Just need some onion."
"This is going to be the grossest sandwich ever."
"Are you kidding? It's going to be great."
"I didn't think you could eat raw broccoli."
"Sure you can."
Harry munched on his banana whilst Louis made his sandwich. He used several
knives and made quite a mess. "You'd better clean up," said Harry.
Louis placed the top on his sandwich and sliced it. "I was going to after,
mini-mum."
"Minimum," said Harry, laughing.
"Not this sandwich. It's maximum." Louis took it out to the meals area and sat
down. Harry followed. The other boys were glued to the TV.
Harry, dawdling by the table and finishing his banana, watched with interest as
Louis bit into it. Bits of broccoli and pineapple fell out, whilst mayo and
chutney oozed out the sides. Louis chewed thoughtfully.
"I was right. It's gross," said Harry.
"No, it's actually not. It's quite delicious."
"I don't believe you."
"You need to broaden your horizons, young Harold," said Louis.
"Don't call me Harold, Lewis."
"Ahh! I hate it when people do that. Harold's cute. It suits you."
"It's not my name," Harry pointed out.
"It's a nickname. Like monkey. Like baby. You like it when I call you those."
Harry actually liked it when Louis called him any pet name, even Harold. But he
wasn't going to tell him that. "I'm getting too old for names."
Louis put his sandwich down. "Really? But I like calling you things."
Harry sighed, shuffled his feet. He looked down contemplatively at his banana
skin. "I guess I like it when you call me things," he said to the table.
"Are you sure? I don't want to offend you."
"I like it when you call me monkey," admitted Harry, looking at Louis, "because
it's special between us. I like it when you call me baby because it makes me
feel like I belong to you."
"You do belong to me," said Louis. "My father is not going to take me away from
you. I'll keep coming back for you, if he does, until he gets so sick of
picking me up all the time that he lets me stay here again. He lives in
Sheffield so it's not like he'll have to just drive down the road."
"Do you think he's going to win?"
"He's got sneaky lawyers. I just don't know. Go throw that banana peel away. I
can smell it and its affecting the taste of my sandwich."
"The bad taste of your sandwich," teased Harry, but went to throw his banana
peel away. He fetched Louis' oatmeal biscuit, because Louis had nearly finished
his sandwich.
"Thanks, monkey," said Louis, finishing up the last of his sandwich. "Hey, want
to play snow-tag?"
"If the other lads do."
"Go ask them."
Harry, munching on his biscuit, crossed over to the TV area and asked the boys.
"Yeah, all right," said Zayn. "My favourite cartoon isn't on until five."
The other boys also agreed, and they came over to the sliding door in the meals
area, where Louis was finishing up his biscuit. They all went out onto the
snow-covered lawn and began playing. The rules were simple, but it was fun.
Harry got caught more often than the others because he was the slowest, but the
boys did try to chase down the others when Harry had had a bit much of it.
Louis was the worst. He was the fastest, and loved shovelling show down their
shirts. They all hated to be caught by Louis. Eventually, four boys with
sopping shirts and one almost completely dry, stopped as Ms Curtis came out on
the back verandah. Louis, the dry-shirted one, noticed her first and ran up to
her.
"Did the trial finish on time?" he asked.
"Yes," said Ms Curtis. "The psychologist gave testimony last, and the closing
statements weren't too long, so we ran a little overtime but it was all wrapped
up. The judge now has to consider his verdict."
"How long does that take?"
"It could be several weeks. The judge has lots of evidence to consider."
"What did the psychologist say?" asked Louis.
Harry had run up with the other boys by this stage.
"You don't mind me telling in front of everyone?" asked Ms Curtis.
"No," said Louis.
"The psychologist was equivocal. He said that your current living environment
was appropriate, but that you may benefit by being back with blood relatives."
"So he was on my dad's side."
"No, he wasn't, Louis. He was as neutral as it was possible to be in the
circumstances."
"Sounds like he took my dad's side, to me," said Louis.
"You had to be there for all of it. He said that he couldn't diagnose you with
any current psychiatric impairment, that he saw little evidence of ADHD but
that might be down to the effectiveness of the medication, but that he thought
in the past, before you came to stay with me, you suffered from at the very
least an adjustment disorder. He was saying you improved under my care."
"I did," said Louis. "It doesn't take some stupid psychologist to figure that
out. Liam's testimony was good enough."
"Liam's testimony enhanced the psychologist's testimony," agreed Ms Curtis.
"Liam was very impressive."
"What did the psychologist say about you, and my dad?"
"I didn't agree with what he said about me. He said I was highly stressed. I
don't agree with that. He said that looking after five boys was taking a toll
on me. I can only presume that was because I told him I had no outside
interests and wasn't interested in a relationship. He couldn't seem to
understand that you boys were enough for me."
"But what will you do when we're all grown up?" said Niall.
"I hope you'll still come and visit me."
"Of course. You're my mum. But you'll be lonely, without us around all the
time."
"I'll worry about that when it comes time," said Ms Curtis. "By the way, the
adoption is moving forwards for all of you, except you, Louis."
"What, my parents are playing along?" said Zayn. "I thought they'd refuse just
to screw things up for me."
"Same here," said Liam.
"I believe they were reminded that the courts could send you back to them at
any time they felt appropriate," said Ms Curtis. "That tended to sway their
thinking."
"My parents suck so much," said Liam.
"Is mine and Niall's adoptions progressing?" asked Harry.
"Yes, love. I'm cautiously optimistic about you both."
"But mine's not," said Louis.
"No. Your father has to agree, and he won't do that at the moment. Maybe when
the court case is all done with."
"You think we're going to win."
"I saw no good reason in the trial to upset the status quo," said Ms Curtis.
"For every benefit in going to your father's, there's a downside. I can't see
why the court would uproot a child at the age of fifteen, who has been in
stable accomodation for years and would prefer to stay there, to give custody
to a man who has never been involved in his life." She turned to go back up the
stairs. "Come inside, all of you. You look damp and I've turned the heating
up."
"Yeah, wonder why we're all damp, Tommo?" said Niall, shoving Louis good-
naturedly. They entered the house and immediately the warmth reached them. They
stripped off their shoes and coats and lounged on the couches like sleepy
housecats, until Ms Curtis shouted about who had left the mess behind in the
kitchen.
"Oops," said Louis, and went to clean up.
***
Life went on as usual. Harry and Louis and Zayn began making the trip every
Sunday to Sheffield to skate on the vertical ramp; although every fortnight
Louis had to leave early to have his visit with his father at two o'clock.
Louis continued to resist bonding with his father. The judge continued to
consider his verdict. Harry's birthday came and went. He was now thirteen, a
teenager. Thirteen didn't provide any more clarity than twelve had. He'd
finally begun growing. He was still the smallest, but he could tell he was
beginning to catch up to Niall. His balls were getting bigger, and so was his
dick. This was a source of enormous pride. He and his schoolfriends Tom and
Callum and Jamie compared sizes; Harry had the biggest balls and the second
biggest dick, although there were arguments over the latter. The boy with the
biggest dick in Year Eight was William, a fact he was not afraid to show off in
the sports changeroom. His was really big. Everyone was envious. Harry
occasionally hung out at William's house after school; both his parents worked
and he had a huge house with a pool table and two PlayStations, one in his room
and one in the games room, so lots of kids hung out at William's. One day
William invited Harry to a circle jerk taking place in the lower back yard.
Apparently, Harry had learned from the others, William loved circle jerks
because he got to show off his big cock. So Harry found himself with four other
boys kneeling in a circle, their pants down around their knees, jerking off.
"Last one to toss off is a loser!" said William.
That made the boys all pull eagerly at their dicks. Harry, realising the eyes
of the others were focussed on their own dicks, looked around. William's dick
really was impressive. The head had reddened quickly, the length and girth
filling out. Harry watched as his balls tightened. He could tell William was
going to cum quickly. Sure enough, after another minute, William was yelping
and cumming straight up in the air and over his hand.
"I win!" crowed William.
"You always win," complained one of the others.
"That's because I'm the biggest."
The boys all seemed to accept that. Harry wondered. He didn't cum any more
quickly via masturbation just because his dick had gotten bigger. He was
excited right now at being surrounded by several other boys wanking and could
tell he was going to cum soon. That was because of the boys, not because of the
size of his dick. He looked up into William's eyes. William was still stroking
his dick very gently, looking around at all the other boys' hard-ons. And Harry
knew. William was gay. That was really why he liked circle jerks so much, and
not because he had the biggest dick.
It was immaterial. Harry was sexually excited and came soon after William, the
warm feeling rising in his balls and shooting through his abdomen out his dick.
He breathed heavily as he continued to jerk off. He looked up, and William's
eyes were on his still-pumping dick. He looked at William, who was biting his
lip looking at Harry. Could he be attracted to him? He was a good-looking boy,
with textured dark hair and reddened lips and cheeks. And that was not even
mentioning his dick.
"You came second, Harry," said William, finally looking up. "Not bad for just-
turned-thirteen."
"I bet I can cum quicker than you next time," said Harry. It was an idle bet;
he didn't think he could. He was just interested to hear what William would
say.
"You're on," said William.
One by one, the other boys finished. Harry had, in the meantime, wiped himself
with a couple of tissues and tucked himself back up. William still kept his
trousers down, until the last boy finished.
"You lose, Trent," he said.
"So? Just proves I'm not a fag," said Trent.
"Watch it, Trent."
"I'm just saying, that's all."
"Maybe you're just not mature enough for this," said William, tucking himself
back into his boxer-briefs.
"No, I'm mature. I was just saying. I lost, all right? I admit it."
"Anyone who calls anyone a fag during these can just fuck off," said William.
"I'm sorry," said Trent, looking nervous. "I didn't mean it."
"You better not have," said another of the boys, pulling up his trousers.
"Because I ain't no fag."
A chorus of voices around the circle agreed. Harry said nothing, but no one
noticed.
As they got up, Harry hung back. So did William. Harry began walking, and
William, coming up beside him, whispered in his ear. "Just you and me,
tomorrow?"
"Okay," said Harry, feeling a thrill.
He didn't tell Louis about his experience. The next afternoon, after school, he
went over to William's. He collected a coke and a pack of crisps--William's
parents were loaded and provided him with whatever snacks he wanted--and went
into the games room. William was playing on the PlayStation but as he noticed
Harry he begged off and came over.
"Hi, Harry," he said.
"Hi, William."
"You want to go for that circle jerk?"
"I'm still finishing my chips," said Harry.
"Hurry up and finish them."
"I can finish them outside," said Harry.
"I thought we'd go into the guest room. More privacy that way."
"Okay," said Harry, agreeably, shoving more chips into his mouth. He soon
finished, and William bade him leave the empty packet on a table and took
Harry, carrying his coke, upstairs. They passed William's room, where people
were hanging out, playing PlayStation. They went into the guestroom at the end
of the hall. William shut the door, and went over to the bed. He pulled the
covers back. "Come on, Harry."
Harry went forward nervously. "It's just a circle jerk, right?"
"Yeah, but our knees may as well be comfortable." William straddled the bed,
undoing his belt. "Come on."
"If you win, what does that mean?"
"It means I've got the biggest dick. Don't worry, Harry. I'm not going to
ridicule you. I'm the biggest, I should come first."
"So," insisted Harry, "why do you want to compete with me?"
"You challenged me, remember?" said William. "Besides, it's just a bit of fun."
"Just a bit of fun," agreed Harry, straddling the bed opposite William and
undoing his trousers. William's dick was half-hard already, whilst Harry was
still soft.
"Not fair," said Harry.
"I'll let you catch up," said William. "Here, do you want me to help you out?"
"What do you mean?"
"If I touch you, you'll get hard faster."
Harry paused. He thought of Louis. He thought of how he was never going to get
anywhere with Louis. "Okay," he breathed.
William shuffled closer, then reached out a hand to touch Harry's dick. William
knew exactly how to jerk him. Before he knew it, he was hard. The sensations
felt so good. Harry had to keep himself from thrusting into William's hand.
"If you touch me," said William softly, "we can do it that way."
"But then how do we decide who won?"
"We don't worry about it," said William. "We just do what feels good. Doesn't
what I'm doing to you feel good?"
"Y-yeah," said Harry. "It feels good. But I don't know if I'm ready, to touch
you."
"That's okay. I can touch myself. But let me touch you, please."
"Okay," said Harry. They were close together. William kept pulling Harry's
dick, whilst Harry let his hands flutter uselessly at his sides. He wanted to
touch William, but at the same time he was scared; what if he didn't do it
properly? William's hand moved on his own dick. He was easily as aroused as
Harry. Harry moved forwards, bucking into William's grip. They were so close
now.
"I don't know what I'm doing," whispered Harry, groping forwards to touch
William. Their thighs were practically together.
"It's okay," said William. "Here, let me guide you," He grabbed Harry's hand,
scrabbling around his thigh, and brought it up to his dick. Harry opened his
hand, touched his dick, and William's folded over it.
"Oh," breathed Harry. Being jerked, whilst touching anther boy, was
indescribable. The sensations in his own dick increased.
William began moaning, and muttering. "Oh yeah, Harry, that's right, that's
good, oh fuck, Jesus."
Harry had to keep back his own litany. He was so close. He thought he'd better
warn William, in case he wanted to take his hand off. "I'm so close."
"Yeah, Harry," said William, "come on, yeah."
Harry made a couple of noises. He couldn't hold back. Cursing, he came,
shooting up over his stomach and William's hand. With a couple more tugs by
Harry, William came likewise.
William collapsed onto Harry, holding him close. "Fuck, yeah. That was
amazing."
Harry continued to breathe heavily. He hoped his heavy breaths consoled
William.
"You okay, Harry?" asked William.
"Yeah, I'm fine," breathed Harry.
William looked earnestly at Harry. "You sure you're all right?"
"Do you have any tissues?"
"Sure." William grabbed a box off the bedside table and threw it down between
them. They each grabbed a handful of tissues and cleaned themselves off, before
doing up their jeans again.
"Give me your tissues," said William. "I'll dispose of them."
Harry handed his tissues across to William, trying to wrap up the stickiness.
"I came first. What does that mean?"
"It means you're sexy, Harry. I want to do it again. Can we?"
"Yeah, all right," said Harry.
After that, William and him seemed to be an item, just like Melody and Harry
were. The difference was the secrecy. Neither William or Harry admitted it;
they didn't even hang around together at school much, unless William's friends
were organising a football game. But Harry knew. He knew, every time William
asked him back to his place (which was all the time) that they were going to go
to the guest room, going to touch each other. They progressed to lying down
together, to performing frottage, whilst still mostly clothed. They didn't
kiss, but Harry had never felt so sexual in his life. At the same time, he
still wanted Louis. The desire for Louis didn't dissipate, like he thought it
would. He was interested in William, wanted to touch him and to be touched, but
Louis had a hold over him. To be touched by Louis would be the pinnacle; would
be more than he ever was with William.
***** Chapter 6 *****
Chapter Summary
     Sorry this was a little short; the next two chapters are my usual
     length.
Harry still hadn't told Louis about William. He didn't like keeping secrets
from Louis, but had a feeling Louis wouldn't approve. He wrestled with the
decision for some time. And finally, one night in bed with Louis, he worked
himself up to admit, "I've got a boyfriend."
Louis jerked. "What? Did you tell that boy you were after?"
"No. It's not him. But it's another boy."
"You're with another boy?" said Louis. "What about the first boy?"
"It's going nowhere with him," said Harry. "But with this boy... we've had
sex."
"Harry. You're too young."
"No, I'm not."
"What do you mean by sex?" asked Louis.
"Touching each other," said Harry. "Rubbing off together. Getting it on."
"You've cum with him?"
"Yes," said Harry.
Louis bundled him up into a hug. "Harry, you're only thirteen."
"It doesn't matter. I'm ready."
"Do you even love this boy?"
"No," said Harry honestly. "But he's sexy."
"Harry, you shouldn't just get it on with someone because they're sexy."
"What about Emily?" asked Harry.
"That's different," said Louis. "That's like, it's a mutual thing. And it means
something."
"So does me with William."
"William, I know him," said Louis. "Isn't he the boy voted most likely to make
Head Boy in your year?"
"That's William," said Harry, feeling proud.
"Jesus." Louis breathed a long breath out. He released his hold on Harry. "I
can't believe you're having sex. We really shouldn't sleep together anymore."
"What does that have to do with it?"
"You're not a kid anymore," said Louis. "You're growing up."
"You keep me safe."
"Harry, you're old enough now to not be afraid anymore. I know you're not
afraid. You don't get me to check the house anymore. Why do you still want to
sleep with me?"
This wasn't going well. Harry wished he hadn't said anything to Louis about
William. "I get nightmares when I sleep by myself," Harry reminded him.
"That was years ago," Louis pointed out.
"I'll stop seeing William."
"Really? To keep sleeping with me, you'd stop seeing William?"
"I need you more than I need him," said Harry.
"Harry, don't you get it?" Louis said. "I'm worried I'm a bad influence on
you."
"You're not."
"How can you know I'm not? I put the idea into your head about sex, I know it."
"This is not about Coach Morrison again." Louis startled against him. Harry
said fiercely, "Lou, you're nothing like Coach Morrison."
"I've talked about sex in front of you before," said Louis. "That makes me just
like him."
"No, it doesn't. You're my older brother, I'm supposed to learn things like sex
from you."
"See what I mean? I did put the idea into your head."
"You did not," contradicted Harry. "William and me and some other boys did a
circle jerk, and that started it off. You had nothing to do with it. Have you
ever even done a circle jerk?"
"No, but that's not the point. I talk about Emily to Darren and the lads, right
in front of you."
"You don't say that much about her. You just talk about how you feel."
"What if that made you want to try it?" said Louis.
"It didn't. William and me doing a circle jerk made me want to try it."
"Jesus," said Louis, again.
"Why are you acting so weird? It has to be that arsehole Coach Morrison."
"Swearing. That's another thing you got from me."
"I've never even heard you say 'arsehole' before, don't be ridiculous," said
Harry. "You wouldn't even teach me how to kiss, and I asked once, remember?"
"You'd already kissed Melody."
"Yes, but I didn't know if I was doing it properly."
"What are you going to do about Melody, now that you're with William?" asked
Louis.
"What should I do?"
"Don't ask me. I don't want to influence you."
"Stop that," said Harry sternly. "You wouldn't be influencing me, you'd be
helping me, like a big brother should."
Louis sighed heavily. "I'm glad I don't believe in God."
"Well, I do, and I know that God wants you to help me, like any big brother
would."
"How serious are you and William?"
"Not that serious," said Harry. "I just go over to his house sometimes after
school and we jerk each other off, or whatever."
"Harry, I don't know what to say. I don't have any experience with gay sex."
"It's all just sex in the end. How serious are you and Emily?"
"I don't love her, I know that," said Louis. "But I like her a lot. She's
someone different to talk to. I like hearing what she has to say."
"Same with me and Melody."
"Do you like Melody or William more?"
Harry didn't have to consider his answer. "As a person, I like Melody more. But
I don't want to give William up. I really like what we do together."
"How will Melody react, if you split up with her?"
"I don't know."
"You've dated her for years," said Louis. "I don't think she's going to react
well."
"I still want to be friends with her," said Harry. "I'll tell her that."
"Somehow I don't think that'll console her much," said Louis wryly.
"It should, because I mean it. I want to still be her science partner and
everything."
"Harry, you don't understand about girls. "
"You and Marissa stayed friends," Harry pointed out.
"We didn't at first," said Louis. "She hated me for a while. You've got to
expect Melody will do the same."
"But we've never had sex."
"It's not just about sex," said Louis patiently. "It's about the girl's
emotions. I've seen you two together when you've been over here. She really
loves you, Harry. You're going to break her heart. Promise me you'll be gentle
with her."
"I promise," said Harry, "but does that mean you think I ought to split with
her?"
Louis sighed. He shuffled in the bed. "I think it's only fair to her."
"But what if she doesn't want to be friends with me, still? I really like her."
"It's a risk you'll have to take," said Louis. "You can't predict these things.
You can only do the right thing."
"When did you split up with Marissa? I don't remember."
"I split up with her when Coach Morrison was..." and Harry could hear the
intake of breath, "doing what he was doing. I couldn't face her. I was glad
when she hated me. I thought I deserved it."
Harry hugged him tightly. "You deserve nothing but love and happiness." Louis
fell silent at that, and Harry tried to gauge how he was feeling through the
limpness of Louis' body in his arms. He could guess what he was thinking. "It's
true, Louis. You're a wonderful person. Don't you dare tell me you're damaged
goods."
"Haz..." Louis fell silent. Then he said, softly, "I've been thinking I should
split up with Emily."
"Not because you think you're damaged goods?" Harry took Louis' silence as
confirmation. "Loius, you can't think like that. It's not true."
"If she knew the truth, she wouldn't want to be with me," said Louis.
"I know the truth, and I want to be with you."
"But you... you love me unconditionally, for god knows what reason. I don't
think there's anything that I could do, or have done to me, that would drive
you away."
"You're right, there's nothing," said Harry, hugging him close.
"I'm so lucky to have you," whispered Louis, reaching up to clutch one of
Harry's arms.
Harry was just glad that the talk about him moving out of Louis' bed seemed to
be delayed once again. "I'll break it off with Melody, I promise," he said.
"Good. But like I said, be gentle. She's really got a thing for you."
They fell asleep together, as usual.
***
The next day Harry resolved to break it off with Melody. Unfortunately, the
girls sought the boys out at break time, and Harry didn't feel he could do it
to her then. She would need the support of her friends. It was during a break
between periods that he caught up to her.
"Melody, can we talk?"
"We've got to go to class," she said. "Tell me there."
"No. It's too important. Here." He pulled her into a recess between lockers.
"Look, I've been thinking," he said, looking earnestly into Melody's blue eyes.
She was clutching her books to her chest. "I think we should split up," he
rushed out.
"What?" She looked at him uncomprehendingly.
"Melody, I really like you. You're one of my best friends. I want to stay best
friends. I just want to split up with you."
"But why?' she wailed. She was close to crying already, Harry could tell.
"I don't like playing husbands and wives," he said, honestly.
"But Harry, that's everything. How could you not like it?"
"I just don't."
"Do you like someone else?" she asked.
"Not as much as you," he said, truthfully.
She looked, shocked, at him. "You like someone else? Since when?"
"I told you, not as much as I like you."
"Then why are you breaking up with me?" Tears were forming in her eyes.
"I'm confused and I need a break," said Harry.
"We can take a break, if you want. It doesn't have to be a break-up. Please,
Harry, don't break up with me." Melody was really crying now.
"Melody, we need to go to class," said Harry, aware that the corridor was
emptying of students.
"How can I go to class, now? What are you doing to me, Harry?"
Melody was right. She was a mess of tears; she couldn't go to class right now.
Harry tried to think of somewhere they could go, where hopefully a random
teacher wouldn't spot them too soon. There was an alcove near the canteen, that
wasn't far away. "Come with me," said Harry. He took Melody's hand and led her
along the nearly empty corridor, around the corner and to the alcove. "Sit
down." She sat, clutching her books to her chest, sobbing. "Don't cry. I didn't
mean to make you cry."
"Why are you doing this to me, Harry?"
"I need a break," said Harry.
"For how long?"
"I don't know. But I still want us to be friends, to do everything together
that we do now, just... no kissing, and no playing husbands and wives."
"But I wanted to lose my virginity to you!" said Melody.
Harry couldn't say he was surprised, exactly. That was what the games of
husbands and wives had been leading up to. "I'm sorry," he said, "but I'm just
not ready for it."
"Why do you have to be so immature, Harry? It's your only fault, how you'd
always rather play PlayStation than kiss."
"I'm just not ready," he repeated. It was a lie, since obviously he was ready
to do it with William; but William didn't want kissing, didn't want great
passionate gestures of love the way Melody did. William was happy just to get
off, the way Harry was.
There was a pause, as Melody tried to collect herself. "Who is this someone
else?" she asked him.
"Nobody important. It's not why I'm splitting up with you, honestly." At least,
it shouldn't be the reason. He should have split up with Melody before now,
ever since he had that talk with Keaton Black, after which he was in little
doubt about his sexuality.
"Tell me who it is," she said. "I deserve to know."
"I can't."
"Tell me, Harry. It's only fair."
Harry hesitated, breathing in quick bursts. Could he tell her? Dare he tell
her? He opened his mouth, and stared at Melody. His lips wouldn't form the
words.
"Who is it, Harry?" insisted Melody.
"William Brown," Harry blurted out.
"Who?" She looked confused.
Harry ducked his head, before meeting her eyes once again and saying, softly,
"William Brown."
Melody stared him in the eyes, open-mouthed. "Harry, what are you saying? Are
you gay?"
"Yes."
"Since when?"
"I don't know. I only figured it all out recently."
"But Harry... did I mean nothing to you, then?"
"No, Melody," said Harry fiercely. "You're one of my best friends. I love to
spend time with you. I just... don't feel romantically towards you."
"But you feel romantically towards William Brown?" she said.
"No, I don't, either, but... he's sexy," admitted Harry. "Don't get me wrong,
you're sexy too, it's just that I can't appreciate you in the same way."
"I'm so confused," said Melody. "All these years we've been together, except
for that one period, and none of it counted?"
"Of course it counted. I told you, you're one of my best friends. I don't want
to lose you. I want things to stay as they were, only with no kissing and
stuff. Well, we can still kiss, like friends do, just not full-on."
Melody was wiping her face. Her books were in her lap, not clutched to her
chest anymore. She faced Harry, sitting as sideways as possible on the bench in
the alcove. Their knees touched. "Harry, this is all so sudden. I don't know
what to do. I don't know if I can be friends with you."
"It would make me very sad if you couldn't," said Harry. "But I'd understand."
"Oh, Harry, all the plans I had for us."
"I'm sorry for wrecking your plans."
"Don't be," she said. "You can't help it. Being gay, I mean. You just should
have told me, as soon as you knew. Every day I've been getting in deeper with
you." She turned her face away, then, as a bout of fresh tears rose in her. "Oh
my god, I can't believe it's over between us." Harry let her cry, knowing
nothing he could think of to say would help. "What do I tell people?"
"Please don't tell them that I'm gay," said Harry, really not having thought
this through. Of course people were going to expect a reason.
"But what do I say?" said Melody. "That you broke up with me. But why?"
"Because I'm a cad," said Harry.
"What's that?"
"Someone who isn't very nice."
"But you're nice. You're just... something you can't help."
"You're being so good about this, Melody."
"Harry, you're like my best friend," said Melody. "If you were just my best
friend, I'd want to be there for you, to support you. But it's more complicated
than that. I have to think of myself, too. I just don't know how to react. But
I know that I'll need my friends to lean on, and I need to give them a reason
as to why we broke up."
"Tell them that I'm immature. That we decided a break was the best thing."
"But that's a lie," wailed Melody.
"It's not a lie that I'm immature. That's even what you said. Just tell them
that." Harry heard footsteps down the corridor. "Shh. Someone's coming."
Melody tried to stay silent but she began hiccuping. A teacher came into their
view, looking curiously into the alcove, straightening up when she saw the two
of them sitting there.
"Why aren't you in class?" she demanded, before noticing Melody's condition.
"Are you all right?"
"No," said Melody.
"You, boy. What are you doing?"
"I was helping her. Melody, do you want to go lie down in the sick bay?" Harry
asked her.
She sniffled, still hiccuping, and nodded.
"She needs to go to the sick bay," Harry told the teacher.
"Come along, the both of you. You're going to need a hall pass, young man." She
led them to the student administration's sick bay, dropping off Melody, before
sorting out a hall pass for Harry and a note to their teacher to explain
Melody's absence. Melody's last words to Harry had been for himself and the
boys to stay away from their group at lunchtime so she could have the support
of her friends.
Harry decided he'd tell the boys straight away. He had a hall pass, after all.
As far as he knew all the boys had Maths together this period. So he went to
their classroom and asked to speak to them. The teacher looked bemusedly at him
until he waved his hall pass, then released them.
"How come you're not in class?" asked Liam.
"I broke up with Melody."
"You what?"
"I broke up with Melody," he repeated. "She needs her friends at lunchtime;
we're not to go up to them."
"You broke up with Melody? But why?" asked Zayn.
"I'm too immature for her. We decided to take a break."
"I'm sorry, man."
"It was my idea. Melody's the one that needs sympathy."
"You did it?" said Liam. "Harry, we never saw any sign. You never said
anything. Everything's looked fine between you two."
"It's been fine, except, I decided to take a break, to work out what I want."
"But you've been together for years," said Niall.
"It was just time for a break," repeated Harry. "Anyway, I've got to get to
class. Just wanted to let you boys know not to go up to the girls at lunch."
"We'll hang out in our old area, then?" said Liam.
"Yeah. See you then."
The boys went back into class and Harry began walking down the corridor. He
looked at his watch. Less than fifteen minutes to go to the end of period.
Almost no point. With his hall pass as protection, he fetched 'The Lion, the
Witch and the Wardrobe' from his locker and sat down on the floor in a recess
between lockers to read.
***
Harry, Niall, Zayn and Liam met back at their old spot at lunchtime. They
finished eating and then Harry noticed William coming up to the group. Just
William by himself. Usually he'd have his friends with him, because he'd want
to play a game of football. So this was unusual.
"Harry," he said. "Want to come hang out with us?"
"No, I'm happy here," said Harry.
William looked perturbed at this. He beckoned Harry out of earshot of the other
boys. Curious, Harry went up to him.
"I'm really horny right now," whispered William. "I thought we could go
somewhere and get off."
"There's nowhere to go," said Harry.
"Yeah there is. The changing rooms. No one would be using the showers at this
time of day."
William must really be horny to want to take such a risk. Harry looked down at
William's trousers. There was a definite bulge going on.
"You'll have to go jack off," said Harry. "I'm not risking it."
"Please, Harry. I'll give you a blowjob."
William had never done that before. Still, Harry wouldn't be swayed. He wasn't
feeling especially horny at the moment, so it was a risk he was simply not
willing to take. "No," said Harry.
William looked infuriated at him. "Then don't bother coming back to my place
this afternoon."
"Fine by me," said Harry, annoyed. He stomped back to the boys.
"What was that about?" asked Zayn.
"Nothing," said Harry.
"You and William have been awfully close lately. I hear you even go back to his
house after school. What's that like?"
"Just a bunch of guys, some snacks, pool, PlayStation," said Harry. "A swimming
pool for when it's summer."
"Must be nice, being rich," said Niall.
"I think his parents neglect him," said Harry. "They give him whatever he
wants, except their time."
"In that case, I'd rather not be rich," said Liam. "If my parents suddenly
became loaded and wanted me back, I still wouldn't give Mum and you lads up for
anything."
"Yeah, when you put it that way," said Niall.
So that afternoon, Harry didn't go over to Melody's, or William's. He went to
the skatepark instead. Zayn didn't come; he had something else to do. Louis
wasn't anywhere to be seen.
"Long time no see," said Leo, high-fiving him. "What have you been up to?"
"This friend, he's loaded, it's a free-for-all at his place after school," said
Harry.
"Sounds like a handy friend. You coming down to the ramp?"
"Yeah."
Harry lost himself in the movement of his skateboard against the concrete ramp.
All his worries evaporated; about Melody, about William, about Louis. It was
just him and his skateboard, as one. He skateboarded until it was time to go
home: to discover he'd missed the big event.
***** Chapter 7 *****
When Harry got home, he noticed nothing unusual at first. Ms Curtis was cooking
dinner in the kitchen; he decided to go in and say hi after dropping his bag
off in his and Louis' bedroom. The boys were outside kicking a football around.
Harry walked down the passage, into his shared room.
That was when he knew something was off. There were no mounds of clothes on the
floor, no junk spread about on Louis' side of the room. Louis' bed was made up
neatly, and that was it. There was nothing else to indicate Louis' presence in
the room. Harry quickly looked at the corkboard and breathed a sigh of relief.
Louis' athletics and skateboarding ribbons were still hung up, the postcard
from Jason who had gone to France over the last summer holidays, the bits and
pieces he pinned up from time to time. For some reason, he'd obviously just
decided to be tidy.
Harry dropped his bag off, changed, and went back to the kitchen. "Hi, Mum!" he
called. He'd started to call Ms Curtis 'Mum' ever since she'd decided to adopt
him.
"Hello, Harry." She left off chopping onions to hug him. "How are you?"
"I'm good. What's for dinner?"
"Spaghetti bolognese. You can set the table if you've washed your hands."
"I've washed them." He was used to Mum's rituals by now.
"Only set five places. Louis won't be here."
"Where is he? At Emily's?"
"You don't know yet." Mum left off her chopping once again. "Of course you
don't, you weren't home. Harry, Louis' court case was decided today. The
judge's verdict was that he should live with his father."
Harry felt his stomach drop. "What?"
"I know, it's a shock. I must admit, I thought the judge would find in our
favour. It seems he was swayed by the extra privileges Louis would get at his
father's home."
"Huh, but... it doesn't make sense. What extra privileges?"
"His own room, a half-sister, regular outings that his father can afford; the
judge described me as an overburdened woman who would clearly benefit from
having less children in my grossly overcrowded home... Harry, I can't believe
it." And Mum started crying.
Harry felt his own tears beginning to fall. He ran up to Mum and hugged her.
Mum hugged him back. "Oh, it was awful, Harry. I had to bring Louis back here
to pack, which he point-blank refused to do, so I did it all, trying to soothe
him, but he wouldn't be soothed, he was crying, he was refusing to go to his
father's; so when his father came to pick him up, he wouldn't go anywhere, so
his father ended up calling the police, and showing them the court order when
they arrived, and the police dragged Louis off bodily... it was so traumatic."
"He's left all his ribbons behind, from athletics and skateboarding," sobbed
Harry.
"Oh darling, that's not all he's left behind. He didn't take his skateboard,
his football... I was so hopelessly unprepared for this. I really didn't think
it would happen."
"Do the boys know?"
"They know."
With a deep inpull of breath, Harry stepped back. "Do you have Louis' new phone
number?"
"Yes, I do. Do you want to call him? Let me get the number." Mum washed her
hands, dried them on the kitchen towel, then took Harry out to the hallway
where the phone was. There was a cork board there, too, and on it was pinned
Louis' new phone number. "This one, Harry. You should call him now. They
wouldn't be having dinner yet, unless they're particularly early."
Mum left, and Harry dialled the phone. It was a cordless phone, so he took it
off to Louis' and his bedroom and lay down on Louis' bed.
"Hello?" a girlish voice answered.
"Can I please speak to Louis?"
"Who's calling?"
"Harry."
"Just a minute." The girl shouted, "Louis! It's Harry!"
The sound of running footsteps was heard, then the phone was picked up. "Hello?
Harry?"
"Yeah, it's me. I only just got home from the skate park."
"I'm in Sheffield," said Louis.
"Mum told me."
"Did she tell you what the judge said in his statement? That she was
overburdened in caring for five teenage boys, that it would be of benefit to
everyone if I was placed in my father's home-"
"She told me. She said that the judge emphasised the overcrowding."
"The judge may as well have been in my father's pocket. He pandered to
everything he said. Did Ms Curtis tell you?" said Louis. "The police had to
drag me away. The only reason I'm here at my father's is because they
threatened to take me back to the psychiatric hospital. I'm not that desperate,
yet."
"Mum said you'd left your skateboard, your football, behind."
"All the more reason for me to come back again."
"But you're in Sheffield."
"I won't even see you at high school," said Louis. "I've been taken out of
ours, and put into some Sheffield one."
"You're not even going to our school?" said Harry.
"Nope. Tomorrow I start here in Sheffield."
"But everyone you know, all your friends, are at school here."
"I know that. But what can I do about it? If I turn up to our school, well, I'm
no longer enrolled, my father's seen to that. So they'll just send me straight
back here anyway."
"What about the Saturday leagues?"
"No," said Louis, "I won't be able to play the Saturday football leagues. I've
already asked the man who calls himself my dad, and he says he won't be able to
drive me over. I've worked out on the bus it'll be two hours to get there,
because there's no connecting bus to Doncaster for ages. He's completely stolen
me away from my life."
"How close are you to the Sheffield skatepark?" asked Harry.
"That's the only good thing about this. I'm less than fifteen minutes walk
away."
"So we can still come and see you on Sunday at the skatepark. And you won't
have to leave early to get to a two o'clock appointment with your father
anymore."
"Yeah, well the man who calls himself my father had better leave me to my own
devices on the weekend. I don't know what I'd do if I couldn't get out to the
skatepark on Sunday. Harry, will you be home tomorrow afternoon?"
"I can be," said Harry, immediately cancelling any plans he had to go to the
skatepark.
"Because I'm coming to get my skateboard," said Louis. "So be there, will you?
I never got a chance to say goodbye properly."
"Of course I'll be here."
"Good."
"I'm going to miss you so much," said Harry. "I'll be sleeping in your bed."
"I'm going to miss you, too," said Louis. "More than you can ever know."
"It won't be the same, sleeping without you."
"Maybe it's for the best. You had to wean off me sometime, Harry. You couldn't
still be sleeping with me as an adult."
"Why not?" said Harry. "I love you. I want to sleep with you. I'm going to miss
you so badly."
"So you said."
"It's true. I don't think you know how much I love you."
"I love you, too, monkey," said Louis.
"I really really love you." Harry tried to project all of his feelings into the
words.
"You're a sweetheart," said Louis. "Look, I'm being called to dinner. Don't
miss me too much, okay?"
"I'll miss you like I miss the sun on a dark morning," said Harry.
"Baby... I love you."
"I love you, too."
"Bye."
"Bye," said Harry, holding the phone to his ear, hoping to catch any last
remnant of Louis. The dial tone soon sounded, though. Louis had left.
He went back out to see Mum. She was stirring a pot. "I'll set the table, now,"
he said.
"Did you talk to Louis?"
"Yes."
"How did he sound?"
"Pissed off. He's coming back tomorrow, he said, to pick up his skateboard."
"Oh, dear.," she said. "I hope that's all he's coming back for."
"What do you mean?"
"I don't want the police to have to be called out again."
"Why would they?" asked Harry.
"If Louis were to sit himself down on the couch, and refuse to budge, how else
could his father get him back to his home?"
"He should just leave him be," said Harry.
"He has a court order," said Mum. "He has all the rights, and I have none. I
don't even have visiting rights. That's how bad this court order is."
"What, you can never visit him again?"
"Not if I want to, no. If he comes here, that's a different story, but even
then, I'll have to shoo him off back to his father's before too long, because
that's where the court has madated he live."
"But that's totally not fair," said Harry. "That judge didn't listen to Liam at
all."
"It doesn't seem like he did, no."
Harry collected cutlery to take out to the table. After he'd set the cutlery,
he got out the mugs. Everytime he went to put something down on Louis' place,
he felt rattled. Louis wasn't here anymore. He got five plates out in the
kitchen and placed them on the kitchen bench. The five plates matched for once.
There was no sixth plate, of a different kind to the others, the one which
Harry had always had. Now he'd graduated to the senior plates. The mismatched
plate stayed by itself, in the cupboard.
Dinner was subdued. Everyone kept glancing to the end of the table opposite
Mum, where Louis would normally be sitting. Instead there was an empty space.
Harry felt acutely the loss of Louis, since Louis normally sat adjacent to his
left elbow. They all ate in silence, mourning the loss of one of their own.
"Great dinner, Mum," said Niall, finishing up.
"Yeah, it was great," said Liam.
"Delicious," said Harry.
Mum looked happy. "I'm glad you all liked it. I added some broccoli this time
to give it extra flavour."
"It worked," said Niall.
"Have you all finished? Take your plates to the kitchen; I've got some trifle
for dessert."
"Yum," said Niall, eagerly standing up and taking his plate to the kitchen.
They ate desert, and did the dishes afterwards, as if everything was as usual.
Harry had a shower, grabbed his robe, and went back out to the TV room, where
everyone was lounging around on the couches as usual, watching a nature
program. Harry sat on the unpopular adjacent couch and watched with his side-on
view. As the nature program ended, it was nearing his bedtime. He desperately
wanted to talk to Louis. Sleeping without him that night seemed downright
strange. He remembered that time when Louis was in hospital; he'd only felt
better sleeping in Louis' bed. He knew the same thing would happen tonight,
that he would sleep in Louis' bed for comfort. But he needed to talk to him.
He snuck out to the hall and rang up Louis' father's number. A lady's voice
answered. "Hello?"
"Hi, please can I speak to Louis?"
"Who's calling, please?"
"Harry."
"I'll get him for you."
There was a pause, while the lady obviously found Louis. Then Louis was on the
phone. "Haz."
"Louis. I'm about to go to bed."
"I figured it was about your bedtime."
"What's been happening?"
"Nothing much. I just had a shower, and now I'm reading a book in my room."
"What book?"
"Catch-22." Harry knew Louis had read that book heaps of times. It was a
comfort book for him, even as he said that Harry wasn't mature enough to read
it. "Am I mature enough to read it now? I'm having sex."
"Don't remind me. It makes me feel like I failed as a big brother."
"You didn't fail. It would have happened anyway. You know, William's putting a
lot of pressure on me. He wanted me to go with him during school and have sex
in the sports showers."
"At school? You're kidding."
"I said no. I wasn't comfortable."
"Good for you, Harry," said Louis. "I think having sex at school, well, it's a
bit desperate."
"He's really horny all the time, he's told me. He needs to get off several
times a day."
"I know a guy like that. He has a terrible time. It really sucks. I'm lucky I
wasn't born a horndog."
"Me, too," said Harry fervently.
"What?'" Louis pulled the phone away from his mouth, sounded like he was having
a conversation. Harry could make out bits of it. Someone wanted him to get off
the phone, even though it wasn't his bedtime. That was unfair. Soon, Louis came
back. "Haz, I have to get off the phone."
"I heard."
"I love you, baby," said Louis. "Sweet dreams."
"Same to you," said Harry. "I'll see you tomorrow, yeah?"
"Yep. I'll be there, picking up my skateboard. Come home straight from school
so that I can see you."
"I will. Bye, Lou."
"Bye, baby."
The dial tone sounded in Harry's ear. He reluctantly hung up the phone, and
went to sleep in Louis' bed. It smelled like him, and comforted him. He hoped
Mum wouldn't change the sheets too soon.
***
The next day Harry woke up in Louis' bed alone. And remembered. He sat up, and
looked around the bedroom. It looked so different, without Louis' stuff
everywhere. It felt different, too. A little less like home. Then he remembered
he would be seeing Louis that afternoon and cheered up a little.
As he got ready that morning, he kept being afflicted with an almost tangible
feel of something missing. No Louis getting changed beside him. No Louis at the
breakfast table. The other boys must have felt it, too; they were
uncharacteristically quiet.
As they sat on the couch deciding whether to go to school or not--Liam and Zayn
liked to go as late as possible, Niall liked to be early, and Harry fluctuated-
-Zayn spoke for all of them. "It feels really weird without Louis around."
"Yeah," said Niall. "I keep catching myself thinking there's something missing,
then realising there really is."
"I hope he's getting along okay," said Liam.
"He's coming over this afternoon to get his skateboard," Harry told them.
"I suppose he'll want his football back, too," said Niall. "One of us lads had
better buy one."
All day at school Harry wondered how Louis would be doing at his new school;
would he be accepted, would he make friends, would he be up with the school's
curriculum?
Jason, Louis' Year Ten football friend who Louis hung out with at school, came
up to Harry at breaktime. "It's true, Louis is really not coming to school
anymore?"
"Yes, it's true. He's going to one in Sheffield now." Harry and the boys were
sitting in their old spot once again as Melody's friends had taken her off
somewhere different to hang out today, somewhere where there were no boyfriends
or ex-boyfriends to taint them. Harry had understood from what Jessica said to
him that morning that boys were most definitely not welcome at the moment.
Jason said, "He told me on the phone yesterday, that his dad had won custody,
and I could hardly believe it."
"We can hardly believe it, either," said Niall.
"So he really isn't living with you guys anymore?"
"He really isn't," said Harry.
"He told me that he's out of our Saturday footie team. I mean, obviously he's
out of the school team, but why does he have to be out of the Saturday team?"
"It takes him two hours just to travel there by bus."
"I don't get why his dad can't drive him," said Jason. "We've got the final to
play this Saturday."
"I don't think his dad wants to."
"His dad's a prick. It's just for the one game."
"His dad told him he thinks footballers are prima donnas," said Harry. "He
wants Louis to play rugby."
"That's what he said to me. Louis' too small for rugby. He's never going to
have the frame for it." Jason sounded exasperated. "It's not going to be the
same, without Louis around."
"No, it isn't," said Harry.
That afternoon Harry sat out on the front steps, reading. But it was hard to
concentrate on reading when Louis could walk up the street any minute. After a
while, Harry set aside his book and went to fetch his skateboard instead. He
went up and down the street, without wearing his helmet. Mum wasn't home so she
couldn't tell him off. It was about an hour after he returned home that Louis
appeared at the end of the street, dressed in an unfamiliar uniform, grey
trousers and a green jumper and green and red striped tie. Harry skateboarded
up to him.
"Louis!" He wanted to hug him, but settled for punching him on the arm. Louis
was funny about public displays of affection these days. It felt like ages
since he hugged him, but in fact it was only two nights ago.
"Harry, you're not wearing your helmet," said Louis.
"You don't wear yours all the time."
"I'm older than you."
"When you were thirteen you didn't wear it all the time."
"Yeah, well, I wasn't any wiser at thirteen than I am at fifteen," said Louis,
as they began walking down the street. "Seriously, Harry, you still stack it
sometimes. I worry about you hitting your head."
"I don't stack it majorly, I just come off. Onto my feet. I've never had a
major stack."
"I never want you to have a major stack. Wear your helmet."
"Honestly, I was just going up and down the street," said Harry. "You know how
unbusy it is. Anyone who comes down it lives here, and knows who I am."
"Promise me," said Louis, "you'll wear your helmet whenever you leave home."
"But Louis..."
"Promise me."
Harry sighed. "I promise."
"Good. Because I'm going to be worrying about you a lot now, and I want to make
sure you keep safe."
They reached the house and went up the front steps. Harry opened the door and
yelled out, "Louis is here!"
The boys dashed into the hallway. "Louis, man, didn't expect to see you so
soon," said Zayn.
"I can't live without my skateboard, you know that."
"Why didn't you take it yesterday?"
"I was being dragged out by the cops. I forgot."
"How is it, living with your dad?" asked Niall, as they moved out of the
hallway.
"It sucks," said Louis. "It's just alien. No beanies at the dinner table. I'm
supposed to freeze my head off, apparently."
"Don't they have heating?"
"Yeah, but to save electricity they keep it just above freezing. Anyway, I hang
out in my room most of the time. Except I had to be with them for dinner."
They flung themselves down on the couches, Harry making sure he got next to
Louis. They weren't touching, but the proximity comforted him.
"How was dinner?" asked Zayn.
"It was awkward," said Louis. "Helen, his wife, kept trying to make small talk
at me. I can't warm to her. She was like, how was school? It sucked, thank you
very much. Can I go back to my old school? Oh, but it's too far away."
"Can't you catch a bus?"
"I looked it up; I can get there by bus if I'm willing to journey for well over
an hour. But they've unenrolled me. I can't go back to school, they've made it
impossible."
"Did you make any friends at your new school?" asked Liam.
"I don't need any more friends. I have enough friends already."
"But someone to hang out with."
"I'm not interested," said Louis.
"You'll be lonely, all by yourself," said Harry. "I don't want you to be
lonely."
"I just can't be bothered. I've got plenty of friends."
"Who you're not going to see as much as you're used to," Niall pointed out.
"I've got a phone now." Loius pulled it out of his pocket. "It'll be easier to
keep in touch with people."
"Your dad bought you that?"
"Tried to bribe me with it. He keeps buying me stuff. He even asked if I wanted
an Xbox or a PlayStation."
"Get an Xbox," said Niall. "Everyone I know has a PlayStation."
"I don't like being bribed," said Louis. "I told him I didn't want either."
"Are you crazy?" said Zayn. "The man's handing out Xboxes and you say no? What
are you going to do all day without us to talk to?"
"Skateboard, now that I'm getting my board back," said Louis.
"What about at night?"
"Telephone people."
"What are you going to do about Emily?" asked Harry.
Louis shrugged. "Split up with her, I guess. I can't carry on a long-distance
relationship." He didn't sound that cut up about it.
"You haven't talked to your girlfriend?" said Zayn.
"I had too many other people to phone last night, I just didn't get around to
her."
Harry dashed out into the hall, where the corkboard above the phone was, and
grabbed Louis' home phone number and a pen. He rushed back into the room. "Give
us your mobile nimber," he told Louis.
Louis did so, and Harry wrote it down and went back to pin the piece of paper
to the corkboard. This was much more private than having to ring the residence
and speak to strangers.
"What's it like, having a sister that you never knew of?" he heard Liam ask.
"I've got four sisters. I don't need another one. We don't have much to say to
one another."
"Yeah, I can just see you, Lou," said Zayn. "Just like when you first came
here. 'Don't bother getting to know me, because I won't be here long'. You're
doing the same thing with your sister, I bet."
"So what if I am? It's no business of yours."
Zayn held his hands up. "Just saying, man."
"Honestly, I don't know her. Those few times I met her while he had the court
order to see me, she didn't make much impression on me. It's not her fault, but
she's not what I need. I just don't need another sister."
"Even one you can see every day?" said Liam.
"I don't need any more strangers in my life. I want to come home, back here. I
just don't need this," said Louis, looking distressed.
Seeing this, Niall changed the subject. "I suppose you want your football
back," he said.
"Nah, the man who calls himself my father has bought me one, so you can keep
mine," said Louis. "I do want my skateboard back, though." He stood up and went
towards the sliding door in the meals area. After loooking at one another, they
boys all stood up and followed him.
Outside, Louis had picked up his skateboard from beside Zayn's, and was looking
it over.
"Lads, do you want to play football?" asked Zayn diffidently.
"I'm in, if everyone else is," said Niall. The others all agreed, except for
Louis, who stood there with his skateboard, loolkiong down at it as if seeing
it for the first time in a long time. "Lou, you in?"
"What? Yeah," said Louis.
They played their usual teams, Niall and Liam versus Louis and Zayn, with Harry
the keeper. Harry was used to it. There was enough action to keep him
interested, and anyway he was the worst football player of the lot. Even on the
rare occasions when Zayn played as keeper and Harry played with Louis, Harry
was enough of a liability to guarantee Louis would lose. With their current
pairings, they were more evenly matched, although Zayn and Louis won more than
the other two.
Louis' phone went off in the middle of their play. He stopped to answer it.
"Jase!" he said. "What's up?"
The others left him to it. Harry came out of goal and paired up with Zayn. They
didn't play a proper game, just kick to kick, because it wasn't fair for Harry
to take over from Louis; Zayn and Louis, currently leading, would lose for
sure. Harry tried not to listen in on the conversation Louis was having with
Jason but he caught certain words. Louis seemed happy about something. He hung
up and came back to the group.
"Jason's dad is going to pick me up tomorrow, so I'll be able to play the
football final after all!"
"Hi-five, man," said Zayn, and held his palm up. The others followed suit and
Louis slapped all their palms.
"I'd better get home," he said. "Don't want to risk getting grounded for
tomorrow."
"How strict is your dad?" asked Niall.
"I don't know. I haven't done anything wrong yet. We'll see. He's told me,
though, if I'm not home for dinner I'll be grounded. Don't want to test him
out. I'll be miserable if I'm grounded."
The boys followed him back up to the verandah, where his skateboard and helmet
was. Harry felt desperate. He needed a hug; he'd been craving one all
afternoon. He'd have to ask for one in front of all the others. Not that they
weren't used to Louis and Harry hugging, but still, he felt embarrassed at his
neediness.
"Louis," he said, just before Louis picked up his skateboard.
"Yeah, Haz, what?"
Harry rushed at him and put his arms around him. Louis, obviously surprised,
took a moment to return the hug, but when he did, he hugged Harry back firmly.
"When will you be coming back next?" Harry asked into Louis' ear.
Louis released him. "I dunno. It's a long way from my father's house to here."
"Can I come down and watch you play the final tomorrow?"
"I'd like to, too," said Niall. "My team didn't make the final."
"Anyone who wants to come down is welcome," said Louis. "Kick-off at ten-
thirty."
"I'll come," said Liam, and Zayn echoed his words. Harry felt happy. He'd get
to see Louis tomorrow, too.
Louis put on his helmet, picked up his skateboard, and turned around. "See you
lads tomorrow, okay?"
"Look forward to it," said Niall, and the other boys echoed his sentiments.
They all followed Louis out to the front, still chatting.
"Well, this is goodbye, otherwise I'll miss my bus," said Louis.
"Can I call you tonight, on your mobile?" asked Harry.
"Of course."
"At bed-time?"
"They don't like me taking personal calls so late at night, but I'll be in my
room and I'll set the phone on vibrate, so they won't know." He continued up to
the road.
"See you, Louis!" called the boys. Louis stopped at the top of the drive,
dropped his skateboard, and with a wave, sped off.
***
Since they all wanted to see the football the next morning, Mum drove them
down. She was looking forward to seeing Louis, too, Harry could tell. There was
an anticipation on her face.
They arrived at the pitch about ten minutes before the scheduled start. Mum and
the boys made their way onto the grassy sidelines to find somewhere to sit.
Harry spotted the Robinsons and led them over that way. They'd all met before,
when Mum had come down to watch Louis in the past. Harry hung out happily with
Ryan Robinson, whose brother was Jason. Mum seemed to get on well with the
Robinsons.
"They're just warming up,"said Mrs Robinson.
Harry sought out Louis amongst the group of boys. There he was, completeing
drills with the other members of the football team. Very soon, the teams were
called to the sidelines and they begn receiving a last minute pep talk from the
coach, before running out to take their positions. Louis was in the starting
eleven, along with Jason.
The match unfolded before them, Jason at half-back giving Louis first use of
the ball in the forward fray more often than not. Louis set up several scoring
assists, all of which failed. The other team scored a goal. Half-time sounded.
The boys on Louis' team gathered around the coach to hear what he had to say.
"Louis needs to get into the forward line, not play on a wing,"said Mum.
"Yeah," said Niall, "I've seen him enough times to know he can be competitive
in a foward position."
"My Jason's doing a good job, though," said Mrs Robinson.
"Both Jason and Louis have been stand-outs," said Mum. "But the forward line is
malfunctioning. Louis plays forward well. They should give him a chance. And I
think they should move Jason up to centre-half-forward."
"I wouldn't be disappointed to see that," said Jason's mother. "What are they
now? Nil-one against. It couldn't hurt to change things up."
"I'm going to talk to Louis," said Harry.
"Don't get in the way," warned Mum.
"I won't."
The coach was talking earnestly to all the boys. He seemed convinced that they
could win this. After all, they were only one down. "Jason," he said, "I'm
moving you to cenre-half-forward. Louis, you're going forward. Raoul, you'll
take Jason's place. Chad, you'll cover Louis." Harry cheered inwardly. "The
rest of you, keep alert for opportunities. We can win this, but only if you're
all on the same page."
The team took advantage of the orange quarters that were handed around and
munched appreciatively. Harry went up to Louis. "We're all here. Mum, and
Niall, and Zayn, and Liam."
"I'll come up." Louis followed Harry back to where the family was.
"Oh, Louis," said Mum, hugging him to her chest.
"Hi, Ms Curtis. Hope you didn't come down because of me."
"Why else would we come down?" said Mum.
"I didn't do too well."
"You did fine. You weren't played in the best position for the team."
"Well, I'm playing on the forward line this second half. Hopefully things will
be different."
"Exactly what we've been saying all along," said Mum. "I'm sure you'll do
fine."
"I should get back," said Louis. "We're not supposed to talk to parents during
the break."
Mum looked happpy as Louis ran back. "I have a feeling this second half will be
different from the first."
The second half soon started up. Immediately there was a difference. Jason
playing in the centre was able to trap the ball's movement to the team's
advantage. Louis playing forward created more opportunities on goal. Soon
enough, with Louis' assist, they put one through. Sohail, the goal kicker, ran
on a victory sprint up to the other goal, the team running to catch up with
him. Soon, another assist by Louis set up another goal. Sohail put a second one
through. He was ecstatic, pulling his shirt over his head, running around like
a headless chicken.
Louis' team was two-one up. It was a tightly fought contest after that, with
neither team gaining a further advantage. When the final siren sounded, Louis'
team had won.
Mum, the Robinsons, and the boys all jumped up in triumph. Harry was cheering
like crazy. He watched as the boys on the field ran towards each other and
congratulated each other. It was so exciting. Louis' team had won.
Eventually the team ran to the sidelines to be praised by their coach. A swarm
of supporters, including Mum, the boys, and the Robinsons, had arrived down to
congratulate the individual team members. It was a frenzy of boys and parents
and siblings. Harry and the boys, more spritely than Mum, reached Louis first.
He was flushed and bright-eyed and still panting. There were slaps on his back
and hugs all around.
Mum finally cut through the gathered crowd. "Louis," she said.
"Mum," said Louis, before looking shocked and saying, "I mean, Ms Curtis."
A play of emotions moved across Mum's face. This was the first time Louis had
ever referred to her as mum. She didn't mention it, though, just bundled him up
in a hug. "I'm so proud of you," she said. "You should get player of the
match."
"Nah, there were others better than me. Sohail got two goals."
"He wouldn't have gotten them if it weren't for you."
"Jason was good, too."
"You were all fantastic," said Mum.
Mum turned out to be correct. At the presentation of trophies, Louis won player
of the match. He collected his trophy, before proudly taking it back to his
team, who slapped him on the back and ruffled his hair. Then they all received
their trophies for the match, to much clapping.
The team were going out to McDonald's to have a celebratory lunch. Louis came
back up to Harry and the boys and Mum before he left. After more congratulatory
hugs, Mum said to him, "You're always welcome in our home, remember that.
You're a son of mine, even if it may never be official."
Louis looked down and mumbled something, looking embarrassed. Mum took the
opportunity to kiss him on the side of the head.
Jason came up. "We're heading off to McDonald's. You coming, Lou?"
"Go on," said Mum.
"You'd never let me eat at McDonald's," said Louis.
"Oh, go on, you. You know I'd let you eat it for a special occasion such as
this."
"You'll be going to the Sheffield skatepark tomorrow?" asked Harry.
"You bet. See you there. Bye, everyone!" Louis raced over to the Robinsons, who
began to leave.
"He seems happy enough," said Mum.
"'He's high on football success," said Zayn.
"He didn't look that happy yesterday," said Liam.
"He says he doesn't want to make friends at school," Harry told Mum.
"Oh dear. He could be retreating into his shell again, like the boy who came to
me all those years ago,"said Mum.
"Me and Zayn are seeing him tomorrow," said Harry. "That will cheer him up."
"What about next week, though?" said Zayn. "With school and everything, we
won't see him again until the following Sunday."
Harry wasn't looking forward to that.
***** Chapter 8 *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
But Zayn turned out to be incorrect. They saw Louis in the middle of the week,
a Wednesday, at the Doncaster skatepark. About an hour after school finished,
he turned up, skateboard in hand. Everyone was overjoyed to see him, especially
Leo, who hero-worshipped Louis. Harry and Leo clung to either side of Louis as
he told the skate boys about his tribulations in Sheffield.
"Their skateramp during the weekdays is really territorial,"said Louis to the
boys gathered around him. "There's this group of Sixth Formers who control the
ramp, who get to say who goes on and who doesn't. It's not like Sunday when
it's free-for-all. They really think they own the ramp."
"Do they let you on?" asked Leo.
"After I kept turning up, they let me on for a trial. I passed, and so now I'm
one of them. Only I let slip that I knew a guy who could get them drugs, so I
think that's really why I'm in."
"What drug dealers do you know?" asked Leo.
Darren hit him. "Adam, idiot."
"Look at this." Louis pulled something out of his back trouser pocket. It was a
wad of several hundred dollars.
"Wow," said Darren. "Whose is that?"
"A bit from each of the gang. I'm going to hit up Adam, see what he has."
"I don't know if Adam can furnish you with that much. He's got whatever he's
got."
"They're not fussed. Their dealer was recently arrested so they need someone
else."
"But Louis," said Harry, "it's illegal."
"What else am I supposed to do?" said Louis. "Skateboarding is all I have. I
got stir-crazy at my dad's house; I spend every moment I can at the skatepark.
If I want to skateboard, I have to do what these guys want."
"You don't," said Harry. "You could keep coming here."
"Haz, it takes me an hour to get here, another hour to get back. I'm lucky if
I've got an hour, an hour and fifteen, to spend here. I have a curfew; 6:00pm.
If I'm not home by then, I'm grounded. The bus is touch and go. If I skateboard
all the way home, I can get back by six. If I miss the bus, though, the next
one's not for half an hour."
"I hate your dad," said Zayn.
"I'm not fond of him either," said Louis.
"So you've only got an hour or so here?"
"Yeah. Then I have to head back." Louis stood up abruptly. "There's Adam. Watch
my board."
They all watched him go over to Adam and have a short discussion, before Adam
beckoned him off to the toilet block.
"He's really going to do it," said Darren.
"Shit, he must be desperate," said Cameron.
"Wouldn't you be, moved to another town, away from all your friends, away from
those you've known as family?"
"I know. I know what's happened to him. But shit, he must be desperate."
Harry thought about Cameron's words. He was right, Louis was desperate. Stuck
in a house with strangers, forced to go to a foreign school, the only outlet he
has was skateboarding, and if his right to skateboard meant pleasing these
other boys, then that was what he had to do. They watched as Louis came back.
His right hoodie pocket was zipped over something bulky, something that hadn't
been there before.
"You did it, didn't you?" said Darren.
Louis picked up his board. "Don't worry about it. It doesn't affect you."
"As long as you don't start getting into drugs. They'll fuck you up, man."
"I won't. It's strictly for the lads. This haul should get me privileges for a
while."
"You bought Adam out?"
"Pretty much. I've asked him to bring extra each Wednesday."
Darren was clearly still displeased. "All you're doing is contributing money to
that sleaze Adam. He's going to move higher up the game if you keep buying in
volume."
"What can I do?" said Louis. "Let's drop it, and skateboard."
"Louis, you don't need to sell drugs," said Harry. "People like you for you.
You don't need to do it."
But Louis shook his head. "These guys mean business. I don't have a choice."
"But you could go to prison."
"I won't go to prison, monkey. Don't worry." Louis tried to console him by
patting him on the back and smiling.
Harry looked across at Leo, to see if this new twist had affected his hero-
worship in any way. It obviously hadn't, judging by the rapt look on Leo's face
at his idol's every word. Harry didn't like it, didn't like it at all, that
Louis was dealing in drugs. Something bad could happen to Louis.
He couldn't talk further to Louis about it, though, because he was already
heading down the embankment to the ramp, along with Darren and the rest,
including Leo but not including Zayn. Zayn obviously wanted to talk to Harry.
"I don't like it," said Zayn.
"Nor do I," said Harry.
"What can we do?"
"I don't know. He's not listening. We just have to be there for him, I guess."
"That's hard, when he's over thirty miles away,"said Zayn. "I talk to him on
the phone every couple of days, I don't know what else I can do."
"I talk to him on the phone every night," said Harry, for whom nightly calls to
Louis' private phone had become a ritual. It didn't in any way make up for
being able to sleep with him, but it was of some comfort.
"He still hates it at his dad's, doesn't he?"
"Yeah," said Harry. "I don't think being charged with a drugs crime would
bother him that much. I think that's the problem. He's got nothing to lose."
"Mum had him well sorted out," said Zayn. "He definitely knew he had something
to lose, living with us. He's back to how he used to be, when he came to us. He
doesn't care."
"What made him care?"
"Time. Support. Love. And you coming along didn't hurt, either. He really took
to you, especially once Nat Pringle got his clutches into you. I think he needs
someone to look after. In the past, he had his sisters; then he had you, had
all of us really, given the way he looked out for us. Now he's got no one,
unless he accepts his half-sister."
"I still talk to him every night," Harry repeated.
"It's not the same over the phone," said Zayn. "He wants to be looking over us,
like a guardian angel. That means being involved in our lives. Seeing us once
or twice a week doesn't fulfil it, particularly if it's only at the skateparks,
where he won't see Niall or Liam. Honestly, you don't know what he was like
when he first came to us. He didn't care about anything. He's going that way
again."
Harry looked towards the ramp. Louis was skating on it, up and down, pulling
moves every time he crested. He had to talk to him seriously, tonight. He
wasn't going to get an opportunity right now.
Louis spent all of his available time either on the ramp, or hanging out with
old friends. Then it was time for him to go. He said goodbye to his friends,
and to Harry and Zayn who'd, in the meantime, come up to the ramp.
"I'll call you tonight," Harry promised him.
"You'd better, little brother," said Louis. "See you all on Sunday!"
They all shouted affirmations back at him. Then he was striding down the grass,
past the kiddies area, out onto the road. Harry watched him drop his skateboard
down to the pavement, watched him push off down the street. He watched him
until he could see him no longer.
Leo, beside him, was doing the same. "I hope he'll be okay."
"I hope so, too," said Harry, thinking of the burden of drugs in Louis' pocket.
***
As usual that night, before he went to bed, Harry called Louis. But a message
kept repeating; the phone was either switched off or out of range. Harry tried
again and again, with the same result. Finally, he had to bite the bullet and
call the residence's home number.
"Hello, Austin residence," said a clipped, female voice.
"Hi, can I speak to Louis, please?"
"I'm afraid you can't. He doesn't have telephone privileges at the moment."
"What do you mean?"
"He broke curfew. That means no phone calls for a week."
"Are you kidding me?" Mum at her strictest had never prevented Harry from
taking phone calls.
"He was home late yesterday," said Louis' stepmum. "He knew the consequences."
"But I can't sleep without talking to him."
"Who is this, Harry?"
"Yes."
"I'm sorry, but you simply can't talk to him. And if I were you, I wouldn't
call so much. You're prolonging his adjustment to his new home."
"But he's my brother!" said Harry.
"I'm sorry, but he's not. He's an Austin now. He has a blood sister who is more
important to him than you."
Harry knew the woman didn't know anything about how close he was to Louis, but
it still stung. "Can't I at least say goodnight to him? He doesn't have to
speak."
"No, I'm afraid not."
"Then can you tell him goodnight from me? Please?"
"On one condition. That you don't call for the next week of his grounding. It's
disturbing to us all."
"Fine, I won't. Wait, can he come out on Sunday as usual?"
"No, he's grounded, I tell you."
Harry wondered how Louis was going to get the drugs to the gang. Maybe he went
to school with them. He'd called them Sixth Formers, like he knew them. "Can
you just please tell him goodnight, and that I'll speak to him next week."
"Very well. Goodbye now, Harry."
"Goodbye, Mrs Austin."
Harry hung up the phone with a heavy heart. Louis had obviously missed the bus
home that day. He wouldn't be able to talk to him for a week. There was
obviously no point in going out to the Sheffield skatepark on Sunday, Louis
wouldn't be there. Harry enjoyed the vert ramp, but without Louis, it wouldn't
be as much fun.
***
The next day, Thursday, William came up to Harry at the lunch break. Harry and
the boys were hanging out with the girls once again; Melody made sure to sit on
the side opposite to him. But she still made eye contact, still responded when
he spoke. They were once again partners in Science, after Melody had swapped
with someone else for a few days. Harry was relieved. He genuinely loved Melody
as a friend and would hate to lose her.
But William. The first Harry knew of his presence was a tap on the shoulder. He
looked up. Oh.
"Can we talk?" said William, looking pleadingly at Harry.
With reluctance, Harry removed himself from the circle. He was still mad at
William.
"What do you want?" he said, when they were some distance from the group of
girls and boys.
William looked contrite. "Harry, I'm sorry about how I acted last week. Can you
come over this afternoon?"
"But you don't want me to come over anymore," said Harry, pissed off at
William's games.
"I do. I never meant never. It was just that one day. I was pissed. I'm sorry.
Please come over? It's been a week."
"Why should I?" said Harry, not intending to make this easy for William.
"Because..." William looked around, before whispering, "You want it just as
much as me."
"I don't. I can live without it."
"Harry, please. I need you. You've no idea how much."
"Let's get some things straight," said Harry. "I don't need you. I do it
because I want to, when I want to, without all this baggage. Is that clear?"
"Yes, Harry." William looked earnest. "I'm sorry for pushing you. It was wrong.
What you give me is enough. Please come over this afternoon."
Louis was grounded. Harry could come over. Still, he didn't want to make it
that easy for William. "You'll never ask me to have sex at school again?"
"I promise, never. That was wrong of me, to expect you to do that. I don't take
you for granted, honestly, Harry. I know how much you give to me."
"Then maybe I'll see you this afternoon," said Harry.
"Please. There's a TV & DVD set up in the guest room now. I asked my parents
for it. It will be fun. I've got some pornos, we can watch them."
"What kind of porn?" asked Harry.
"Straight... and gay porn," said William, blushing.
"Good," said Harry.
"Come over, we'll eat chips, watch a porno, and take it from there."
"Don't your friends wonder about what you're doing, locking yourself away in
the guest room?"
"They're not my friends," said William. "They're guys I hang out with. They
don't care if I'm there or not, as long as they get free snacks and get to play
games without parents to bother them."
It was sad in a way, Harry reflected, as he left William with a half-promise,
and rejoined his friends. William was the most popular guy in their year, and
yet he still obviously had an inferiority complex. Whether that was because he
was gay, Harry didn't know. Being gay in a straight world was enough to get
anybody down on themselves, though, Harry knew from experience.
He dithered about it all day, but that afternoon found himself going over to
William's house. As usual the large four-level house intimidated him, but he
walked in around the back door without being challenged, as always. He grabbed
a packet of burger rings from the crisps assortment spreak out on the table,
and a coke from the fridge. Where was William? He spotted him soon afterwards,
entering the room. William immediately made a beeline towards Harry.
"Harry," said William, looking relieved. He whispered, "Come on back to the
guest room."
Harry acquiesced. William motioned Harry ahead of him, then twisted the lock so
that they could have privacy.
"Look," he said, pointing to a cabinet across the room. A TV and a DVD player
had been set up in it.
Harry marvelled. "Didn't your parents wonder what it was for?" he asked.
"They thought the guest room needed one for a long time. I didn't even have to
persuade them, just suggest it."
"How often does the guest room get used?"
"Once a month or so. When they have relatives or business partners over. They
change the sheets before every visit. You don't have to worry about anything.
Here, let's watch some porn."
"Are you gay?" said Harry suddenly.
William, DVD in his hand, looked anywhere but at Harry. "Look, just because I
do this-"
"I'm gay."
"-with you... what? You're gay?"
"Yeah. I'll keep your secret if you'll keep mine. Don't be afraid to say so in
front of me," said Harry.
William still looked all about the room. "I don't know. I really don't. I get
off on guys right now, but who's to say there's not a perfect girl waiting for
me around the corner?"
"I had the perfect girl," said Harry. "It wasn't enough."
"Let's just watch a DVD, yeah?" said William. "I haven't watched any yet.
They're all new."
"How do you get access to pornos?"
"I've got an older cousin. He lets me buy them on his credit card. He takes a
cut, though, so it's not that cheap. Which would you rather, straight, or gay?"
"Gay," said Harry.
William loaded the DVD, then motioned Harry back onto the bed. They were side
by side, sitting up against the pillows, as the DVD began. It was from the
United States of America, featuring a bunch of college boys at a frat party.
There were females there, but it seemed they were not the purpose of the DVD.
One boy paired off with another in a bedroom. Meanwhile, a third guy was spying
on them through a hole in the wall, jacking off. It was cheesy, but the sex was
very real. Harry was enthralled. It was the first time he'd ever seen anal sex.
It didn't seem to hurt, like the rumors he'd heard suggested.
Beside him, William offered comments; "Oh, that's so hot; yeah, stick it in
him; how can that guy just stand to watch?" Harry was silent, though, letting
the images seep into him. He was hard, but didn't feel the urge to touch
himself. He enjoyed the feeling of his dick swelling without being touched.
When the two frat boys had both orgasmed, William paused the DVD. "Harry," he
said, touching Harry on the arm.
"Yeah?"
"You can't say that didn't make you horny."
"I'm turned on," Harry admitted.
William was being cautious, treating Harry with care. "Let me touch you?" he
asked.
"Let's get our trousers off," said Harry. He'd already taken his shoes off when
he got onto the bed. William needed no second invitation. They both tugged
their school trousers off, and both kicked their socks to the side of the bed.
William began pulling off his shirt, and Harry followed suit with his jumper
and shirt. Quickly, they were down to their underwear. Harry's bulged, as did
William's. William reached out to touch Harry through his underwear. Harry
hissed at the stimulation, mild as it was. He'd been hard for a while now.
"Harry, take them off," said William.
"If you take yours off."
William needed no second invitation. He whipped his underwear off, exposing his
engorged cock. Harry followed suit, displaying his own pretty decent cock.
"Harry, let me touch you," said William, reaching a hand out in anticipation.
"Okay," breathed Harry. William's hand wrapped around his dick and began
stroking. It sent shocks though him. He reached down to touch William's dick.
It responded to his grip, filling out more. They stroked each other off, until
they were close, sitting up against the pillows, when William said, "Can I kiss
you?"
Harry was being rocked with arousal, his body unable to keep still. He was open
to anything. "Yes," he said.
William immediately latched onto Harry's lips and pressed his tongue in. It was
abrupt, and strange at first, but quickly turned sexy and Harry wriggled under
the stimulation. It wasn't long before he pulled back from the kiss and said in
a strained voice, "I'm cumming," to William, who didn't leave off him in any
way. He enouraged Harry through his orgasm, through the white ropes landing on
his chest, then began panting heavily at Harry's touch.
"Oh, I'm so close," he breathed. "Keep kissing me." Harry obliged, twisting and
firming his grip on William's dick until, with a shout, William was cumming.
"Oh Harry, how I've missed you," groaned William.
"Circle jerks weren't enough?" said Harry.
"Nothing compares to touching you. Harry," and William sat up from where they'd
slouched on the pillows, pulling Harry with him. He held him close. "I want to
be your boyfriend. Your secret boyfriend. I want to be faithful to you, to let
no one come between us. It'll always be you and me."
"But I'm in love with someone else," admitted Harry.
"You're seeing someone else? Who?" demanded William.
"I'm not seeing him. He doesn't love me back, not in that way."
"So you've got no chance with him?"
"No."
"So be my boyfriend. My secret boyfriend," amended William.
Harry considered William's offer. "No one else will know?"
"No. It'll be a secret."
Louis already knew. So did Melody. But they wouldn't tell anyone else.
"It'll just mean we're exclusive to each other," added William. "You aren't
allowed to let anyone else touch you but me. Not even a girl."
"Like people are queuing up," said Harry.
"You're cute, Harry. And you've shown that you're loyal; you dated Melody for
years. Since you split with her, all the girls are talking about how you're
available. They think you'll be a catch."
Now that William mentioned it, he had noticed a definite increase in girls
giggling at him but simply hadn't paid it much attention. A couple had even
asked if he was going to date again, to which he'd been non-commital, even
though he didn't plan on dating any girl again. There was no backing away from
the truth; he definitely liked boys.
"We have to promise not to out each other," said Harry.
"I promise. It'll be a secret. No one will ever know. Cross my heart and hope
to die."
"Okay, I'll be your secret boyfriend," said Harry.
"Yes!" said William, clenching his fist, before diving on Harry to hug him.
"But no pressuring me for sex. If I say no, I mean no."
William kissed Harry sloppily, before saying, "Does that mean you don't want to
go again?"
"I'm just not as horny as you, William. You'll have to accept that."
"I know, I know, I won't pressure you. Do you want to keep watching the porno?"
"No, I want to play pool."
William sighed, but acquiesced.
***
The school was preparing for the athletics carnival. Everyone had had to try
out, even perennial losers like Harry. He came last, of course. He was taller
than some of the boys but they still beat him easily. Harry wished more than
ever Louis was at school. Louis was talented at running and Harry was going to
miss cheering him on.
He finally got to talk to Louis again the next Thursday. After school, he tried
Louis' personal phone and it worked.
"Hello," said Louis. "Is that you, Haz?"
"Yep. So you finally got your phone back?"
"I've got a billion messages to answer. I don't even know where to start. I'll
have to do a lot of texting, I don't get that much calling allowance."
Harry sighed. He felt warmed to hear Louis' voice for the first time in a week.
"What's up, monkey?" said Louis.
"Nothing much. I got tortured into doing track."
"Poor baby. Did you come last?"
"Yes."
"I came first in the time trials for my house,"said Louis. Harry could hear the
rumbling of skate wheels as Louis spoke. "I've improved since last year. A pity
I won't be facing Clinton from St Joseph's. I could give him a real challenge."
"So you have an interschool carnival?"
"Yeah. It's against other Sheffield high schools. Bigger than Donny's little
competition."
"Adam was looking for you yesterday," said Harry. "He came up to us."
"Did you explain I was grounded?"
"Yes. He was pissed, though. He said he'd bought all this extra, what he called
merchandise, and what was he going to do with it now? Darren told him to flush
it down the toilet."
"Darren would," said Louis.
"Adam said if you're not there the next Wednesday, the deal's off. How did you
manage to get the drugs to the Sixth Formers if you were grounded?"
"We had to do the transaction at school. They weren't happy, but there was
nothing I could do. They made me carry the risk all day, leave the drugs in my
locker, and they collected after school."
"So they do go to school with you," said Harry.
"Yeah. They were pleased at what I'd brought them, even though it was a mish-
mash. I'm allowed back down to the skatepark today. My grounding's over. That's
where I'm heading right now."
"To the Sheffield one?"
"Yeah."
"I miss you so much," said Harry.
"Don't get sappy on me."
"You'll be going down to the Sheffield skatepark on Sunday?"
"Of course. Now that I'm no longer grounded."
"I can't believe they took your phone away."
"I can't believe it, either," said Louis. "They only just gave it to me, then
it was gone. Like I said, the amount of messages I have to respond to. They
couldn't answer it themselves for some reason, to tell people not to phone. So
all these messages have piled up. People must think I've been ignoring them for
a week."
"I told Jason," said Harry. "So he knew."
"I've got Darren, I've got Leo, I've got all the skate boys. I've got Zayn and
Niall and Liam. Didn't you tell them? I've got Emily--I still didn't get a
chance to break off with her. I've got a couple of the footie lads, plus Jason,
to get back to. I'm going to be on the phone all night."
"Next time, leave early enough to catch your bus," said Harry.
"Thanks, Einstein, I've figured that out for myself. Look, I'm at the
skatepark. I'll talk to you later."
"Can I phone you tonight?"
There was a pause, and Louis said softly, "Always."
"Okay. Talk to you then. Bye."
"Bye." Louis hung up.
He sounded all right. But Harry detected a front of bravado. Underneath it all,
he didn't think Louis was as good as he was making out to be. The last week had
to have taken a toll on him, with him being housebound and banned from speaking
to his friends. But maybe he'd made a friend or two at school. Harry would have
to ask him about that tonight.
That evening, Louis called Zayn and Niall and Liam. They were all happy to hear
from him.
"When are you coming over next?" Harry could her Niall ask. "But I'm scared of
your dad, Louis. What if he grounds you again, just for having visitors?
Besides, we'd only get an hour or so, given the buses. How about Saturday,
though. You don't have football anymore. We could come over yours, or you could
come over here... yeah, you could? It'd be great to see you, mate, all the lads
have been missing you. Come over for lunch, I'm sure Mum won't mind. Wait a
minute." Niall shouted, "Mum! Can Louis come over for lunch on Saturday?"
"Of course!" Mum called back.
"You're on," Niall said into the phone. "Saturday. You've talked to Zayn, you
want to talk to Liam? He wants to talk to you."
Liam shot out of his seat at the words and went into the hallway.
"Yeah, here he is," said Niall. "See you Saturday, bro."
Liam took over as Niall bounced back into the main room, sitting in Liam's
vacated spot on the prime couch. "I won't keep you, Harry said you had lots of
phone calls to make," Harry heard Liam say. "Yes, I'm looking after all the
boys. Of course, Harry. He's doing fine. Well, he misses you, anyone can see
that. We're all there for him, it's more than you've got. Seriously, Louis, we
worry about you. Getting grounded for the past week--what have you been doing
all this time? Did you let your dad buy you an Xbox... no, so what have you
been doing? You're going to get your dad to buy you a guitar? Well, that's
something but we both know you're not very good at it. A chord book? Well, that
could make a difference, I suppose. Louis, we all love you, never forget that.
We wish you were back home. Maybe something will happen and you'll be allowed
back. I know it doesn't sound realistic, but you never know. Yeah, yeah, I'll
let you go. Bye, Lou. We all miss you."
Liam came back into the room. "All he does is hang out in his room all day. And
there's nothing in his room except a stereo, which he doesn't have anough CDs
for. He's been doing homework, but he's awfully bored, I can tell."
"Did I hear you say, Nialler, that Louis was coming over on Saturday?" asked
Zayn.
"Yeah,"said Niall. "He's coming over for lunch. At least he doesn't have to
answer to where he is on Saturday, otherwise I bet he wouldn't be allowed."
"Yeah, his family seems to have something against us," said Harry. "I got told
by Mrs Austin last week that my phone calls were delaying his adjustment into
his new home, or something."
"It's not fair that they expect him to cut off from his former life," said
Liam. "Everyone's entitled to keep up with their friends. He doesn't have any
friends in Sheffield. Obviously he's going to want to keep up with us."
"I told Mrs Austin I was his brother. She objected to that."
"But we've been brothers for years. How can she just expect us to turn our
backs like that?"
"All I know is, she doesn't like me phoning," said Harry.
"I notice you always phone him late at night, except for the past week," said
Zayn. "Are you going to do the same thing tonight?"
"Yes," said Harry. "I don't care what they think. I haven't slept as well
without talking to him."
True to his word, Harry phoned Louis on his personal phone before he went to
bed that night.
"Hello, monkey," whispered Louis. He whispered as always because he didn't want
anyone in the house to know he was talking on the phone.
"Have you made any friends at school yet?" asked Harry.
"No, I told you, I don't want to."
"But Louis, it's been another week. Aren't you lonely?"
"Yeah, but it's better than making friends and moving on again."
"Why would you move on?"
"When my dad figures out I'm not going to accept him, obviously he'll ask me to
move on."
"I don't think the courts would like that," said Harry. "He's put people
through an awful lot of trouble."
"He doesn't care about the courts," said Louis. "All he cares about is getting
what he wants. When I turn out to be not what he wants, he'll throw me out, I
know it. And because I'm in Sheffield, I'll probably be sent to another foster
family here, and not back to Ms Curtis."
"But there must be special circumstances that will let you get sent back here."
"Not the way it works, buddy."
"But Mum wants to adopt you. Surely that will make a difference."
"Maybe," said Louis, "but dad can kick me out and still refuse the adoption.
The law allows him to be a pig, and a pig he'll be."
"Louis," Harry sighed. "What can I do?"
"There's nothing you can do. The courts have had their say."
"The courts suck," said Harry.
"That they do. Still, I'll see you on Saturday, right?"
"Absolutely. Will your dad let you go, though?"
"I don't tell them what I'm doing on the weekends. Just that I'm going over to
a friend's. I've got my phone on me so they can monitor me, which they do."
"So the phone wasn't really a present, it was a monitoring device?"
"So it seems," said Louis. "I've only got limited calls on it before it stops
working until the next month."
Harry wanted to say all sorts of things. How he missed Louis, how he missed
sleeping with him, how he missed his hugs and his gestures of affection. All
the boys were affectionate with each other, but it wasn't the same without
Louis' affection. Louis' love affected him ten times as strongly. "I miss you,"
said Harry, the strongest thing he could say under the circumstances.
"I miss you too, baby."
"Imagine that I'm there, and hugging you."
"How?" said Louis.
"What I do, is I turn your pillow onto its side, then I imagine it's your
body," said Harry.
"I can't see how that could work. It's a pillow."
"Yours smells like you. I guess that's why it works for me."
"This pillow doesn't smell like you," said Louis. "It wouldn't be the same."
"I could give you Monkey."
"Harry, I'd need your clothes, your shampoo, every part of you. I need you.
Nothing's going to substitute for that."
This was Louis admitting to Harry that he needed Harry as much as Harry needed
him. Harry wasn't going to rub it in. "Just try it with the pillow. Try to
imagine it's me," he said.
Louis sighed. Harry could hear him shuffling around. Then Louis spoke again.
"I've got two pillows. I've kept one for my head, and one for you."
"That's what I do," said Harry. "I bring my own over for a pillow, and lay
yours down beside me. When I sniff it, it smells like you."
"None of my pillows smell like you."
"Maybe we could swap pillows. On Saturday, when you come around. You bring
yours, and I'll give you mine. And Monkey."
"What will you do without Monkey?"
"I've been weaning off him for a while. I don't think I need him anymore."
"Not even without me there?"
"Well, maybe a little bit. But I've got your whole bed to comfort me. You don't
have anything like that."
"I'll see you Saturday," whispered Louis.
"Bring your pillow," Harry reminded him.
"Okay. Bye, baby."
"Bye, Louis," said Harry. He pressed end on the cordless phone and took it back
up to the hall, before returning to his room. It felt weird to have a room to
himself. He ignored his own bed, as usual, and lay down in Louis'. Mum had
changed the sheets but he could still smell Louis in the blankets, and of
course, the pillow. He propped his own pillow up behind his head, and brought
Louis' pillow down to hug. It was the only way he could get to sleep.
Chapter End Notes
     There's a Part Three on its way imminently; give it a week. It will
     be Larry and it's nearly finished at 65,000 words. Hope you all
     enjoyed the journey so far!
End Notes
     I'm no expert on law, particularly British law. There's a few legal
     issues in this; please don't nit-pick me on them if I got them wrong
     because I did what I could for research and the story would never
     have been written otherwise.
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